Looking for hope
Looking for hope
Hi everyone - I have lurked on here off an on for a couple years, really. Decided to join and become a part of the family.
I am in my 40's, a single mom, a professional, and a Christian. I've tried to quit twice before and only lasted 8-10 days. I have hit rock bottoms and it didn't stop me. I cant believe I have let this go on. I am so full of regret and shame and loneliness.
But I am done, done, done. This is my first day with zero, but have been detoxing for 3 days as I only had little bits the last 2 days. I am a wreck physically and emotionally.
I have been listening and reading a lot these last couple days about recovery and am not sure what to use yet.
I hear so many stories of relapses and right now I am just so fearful of that. I don't want to take it one day at a time - I want to be done.
I just cant stop crying tonight....
Thanks for reading.
I am in my 40's, a single mom, a professional, and a Christian. I've tried to quit twice before and only lasted 8-10 days. I have hit rock bottoms and it didn't stop me. I cant believe I have let this go on. I am so full of regret and shame and loneliness.
But I am done, done, done. This is my first day with zero, but have been detoxing for 3 days as I only had little bits the last 2 days. I am a wreck physically and emotionally.
I have been listening and reading a lot these last couple days about recovery and am not sure what to use yet.
I hear so many stories of relapses and right now I am just so fearful of that. I don't want to take it one day at a time - I want to be done.
I just cant stop crying tonight....
Thanks for reading.
It's natural to feel all kinds of emotions right now.
Just remember this: You can do this. Done, done, done is the starting place for a renewed life.
Hang in there. Stay close. Don't drink. You're going to be OK.
Just remember this: You can do this. Done, done, done is the starting place for a renewed life.
Hang in there. Stay close. Don't drink. You're going to be OK.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 1,462
Julia,
I found hope here on SR. So many people just like us that stay sober. Everyone understands exactly what it's like to be like "us". Welcome you will find so much information to help. It really gets better with out drinking. Good to meet you
I found hope here on SR. So many people just like us that stay sober. Everyone understands exactly what it's like to be like "us". Welcome you will find so much information to help. It really gets better with out drinking. Good to meet you
Hi Julia
My hope began again when I found this place. So many stories I related to, so much understanding, and so many success stories.
SR help[ed me believe it might be possible for me to leave drinking behind.
And it was possible - nearly 10 years now
I'm so glad you've joined us
D
My hope began again when I found this place. So many stories I related to, so much understanding, and so many success stories.
SR help[ed me believe it might be possible for me to leave drinking behind.
And it was possible - nearly 10 years now
I'm so glad you've joined us
D
Why most people fail is they aren't willing to do what is necessary. Alcoholism, shame, pride and guilt keeps them in the endless loop of trying to do it on there own and failing.
I can't think of one thing I wanted to do to get sober. I didn't want to go to a doctor, I didn't want to go to IOP, I didn't d want to tell family members (they already knew), I didn't want to go to AA, six days a week,I didn't want a sponsor, and I didn't want to work the steps and even today seven years sober there are still things I don't want to do.
You know what? I did them and I do them because nothing is more important than my sobriety. I do them in good times and bad. If you know anything of my story I had some very bad times but I made it through them sober which is a testament to my willingness to do what I had to.
There is an incredible sober life out there just waiting for anyone that really really wants it. Will power is helpful but willingness is the key
I can't think of one thing I wanted to do to get sober. I didn't want to go to a doctor, I didn't want to go to IOP, I didn't d want to tell family members (they already knew), I didn't want to go to AA, six days a week,I didn't want a sponsor, and I didn't want to work the steps and even today seven years sober there are still things I don't want to do.
You know what? I did them and I do them because nothing is more important than my sobriety. I do them in good times and bad. If you know anything of my story I had some very bad times but I made it through them sober which is a testament to my willingness to do what I had to.
There is an incredible sober life out there just waiting for anyone that really really wants it. Will power is helpful but willingness is the key
There's no doubt you can do this, Julia. I drank 30 yrs. & now have over 8 sober. Being here at SR eased my mind & helped calm my anxiety. It was so good to know others who understood & cared. Congratulations on making this big change in your life - you're never alone.
hi Julia,
'Hope' is the thing with feathers-
That perches in the soul
......
well, that's Emily Dickinson .
you've got it, that perching feathered thing in your soul.
it's what made you show up here.
I don't want to take it one day at a time - I want to be done.
yes. i get it. i wanted to be done forever, and i needed to know that is possible. and it is. but you can't be done tomorrow without taking today as the day you have today.
i can reasonably expect long-term sobriety by doing the things i do today. and then tomorrow.
great to hear of your decision and congratulations on showing up here. since you've lurked for a good long time, you will have an idea of the different ways people are moving ahead.
you might also have noticed some posters who have what you're looking for. this might be a good indicator for your own path forward.
feed that feathered hope some nutrition-packed action-grain and it will get stronger.
stick around.
'Hope' is the thing with feathers-
That perches in the soul
......
well, that's Emily Dickinson .
you've got it, that perching feathered thing in your soul.
it's what made you show up here.
I don't want to take it one day at a time - I want to be done.
yes. i get it. i wanted to be done forever, and i needed to know that is possible. and it is. but you can't be done tomorrow without taking today as the day you have today.
i can reasonably expect long-term sobriety by doing the things i do today. and then tomorrow.
great to hear of your decision and congratulations on showing up here. since you've lurked for a good long time, you will have an idea of the different ways people are moving ahead.
you might also have noticed some posters who have what you're looking for. this might be a good indicator for your own path forward.
feed that feathered hope some nutrition-packed action-grain and it will get stronger.
stick around.
Welcome, Julia!
I am sorry you are feeling so down.
But just remember there is help and support here for you! You truly are not alone. Just keep posting, posting, posting.
If others can get through this than you certainly can too!
I am sorry you are feeling so down.
But just remember there is help and support here for you! You truly are not alone. Just keep posting, posting, posting.
If others can get through this than you certainly can too!
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