Hospital Again!
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Originally Posted by lynnmarie123 
Almost a week! That's awesome!
Don't be too hard on yourself with food yet. If a crisp or a chocolate keeps you from taking a drink, go for it. I did and gained 5 pounds in the first couple weeks but I didn't care. It got me through. I lost those 5 and another 10 and I have 8 months sobriety.
You can do this. Build your toolbox and work your plan. This site is amazing. Use it daily. It has been a huge help in educating me about alcolholism and sobriety. Coming here daily is part of my plan.
Continue posting and stay strong (or scared!)
Don't be too hard on yourself with food yet. If a crisp or a chocolate keeps you from taking a drink, go for it. I did and gained 5 pounds in the first couple weeks but I didn't care. It got me through. I lost those 5 and another 10 and I have 8 months sobriety.
You can do this. Build your toolbox and work your plan. This site is amazing. Use it daily. It has been a huge help in educating me about alcolholism and sobriety. Coming here daily is part of my plan.
Continue posting and stay strong (or scared!)
Trying to do too much too soon, might be setting myself up for failure on all fronts!
Eight months? that is fantastic lynnemarie.
I don't care how fat I get, like you said, that can be lost later.
I am still working on thinking up a plan...
I will stay scared, haha...I have that cal CT scan of my heart to come...whenever they send that appointment...but more than the fear of that..is the fear of being in that dark, drunken place I was this time last week
Thanyou for the advice
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Now I am feeling a little better, I deceided to be a bit more fierce. I got a doctors appointment..yey!!
You have to ring up 8.30 to get an appointment in the next couple of days. Only there are only a few slots, and the phones are usually constantly engaged until, when you get through, all the appointments are gone.
This morning I set the phone up so I just had to hit the ring button at exactly half 8 on the dot. After twice getting a "This surgery is closed" message, I just redailled and redialled..and I was answered...a miracle!
This is only meant for "urgent appointments" so I told her yes, it's urgent. And I got one for this afternoon.
Well I'm sick of saying "urmm..well not EXACTLY urgent" and having to wait a month.
I reckoned for once I'm going to stick up for myself.
It IS urgent. Although the doctor thinks drinking is a "moral matter"... its the medical profession not moral you have to go through get proper help here..so therefore for me it IS as urgent as someone with tonsilitis..which he would "accept" as urgent! Anyway..I don't need his help anymore, I am waiting for the recovery team to call. I just need his sick note to be able to go there..and to see what he says about those bloody deathly tablets.
Anyway, Im taking that letter with me I got from the hospital that says I have "active" high bp, and according to the CIWA ..I have "active alcohol dependance"
so whether he likes it or not..that is counted as a medical problem.
AND I have been unable to turn off the huge radiator in the kitchen when I put the heating on to warm the living room. I don't want that on, it costs a fortune, its a waste and the knob to turn it off had been painted over so was stuck on the "on" position. I told the landlord, and he does nothing.
So this morning..I hit it with my hammer and unstuck it myself! There, no more wasted money on heating a room Im not in!
You have to ring up 8.30 to get an appointment in the next couple of days. Only there are only a few slots, and the phones are usually constantly engaged until, when you get through, all the appointments are gone.
This morning I set the phone up so I just had to hit the ring button at exactly half 8 on the dot. After twice getting a "This surgery is closed" message, I just redailled and redialled..and I was answered...a miracle!
This is only meant for "urgent appointments" so I told her yes, it's urgent. And I got one for this afternoon.
Well I'm sick of saying "urmm..well not EXACTLY urgent" and having to wait a month.
I reckoned for once I'm going to stick up for myself.
It IS urgent. Although the doctor thinks drinking is a "moral matter"... its the medical profession not moral you have to go through get proper help here..so therefore for me it IS as urgent as someone with tonsilitis..which he would "accept" as urgent! Anyway..I don't need his help anymore, I am waiting for the recovery team to call. I just need his sick note to be able to go there..and to see what he says about those bloody deathly tablets.
Anyway, Im taking that letter with me I got from the hospital that says I have "active" high bp, and according to the CIWA ..I have "active alcohol dependance"
so whether he likes it or not..that is counted as a medical problem.
AND I have been unable to turn off the huge radiator in the kitchen when I put the heating on to warm the living room. I don't want that on, it costs a fortune, its a waste and the knob to turn it off had been painted over so was stuck on the "on" position. I told the landlord, and he does nothing.
So this morning..I hit it with my hammer and unstuck it myself! There, no more wasted money on heating a room Im not in!
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DO NOT attempt to quite smoking while also attempting alcohol...
plan the cig quit in maybe 6-8 weeks as that sounds like a recipe for failure on both fronts... I tried that before 7 days into withdrawals and it was all out panic and anxiety (which are par for the coarse with nicotine withdrawal) and although they say alch w/d last a few days it really lasts a few weeks... take one thing at a time fripfrop
plan the cig quit in maybe 6-8 weeks as that sounds like a recipe for failure on both fronts... I tried that before 7 days into withdrawals and it was all out panic and anxiety (which are par for the coarse with nicotine withdrawal) and although they say alch w/d last a few days it really lasts a few weeks... take one thing at a time fripfrop
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Ok SH, I don't want to rush things and fail at both!
I don't suppose another 6-8 more weeks of smoking is going to make much difference after 30 years!
I can well imagine it takes a few weeks to get over alcohol withdrawals, still only had one nights sleep since last Tuesday!
Thanks for the advice
I don't suppose another 6-8 more weeks of smoking is going to make much difference after 30 years!
I can well imagine it takes a few weeks to get over alcohol withdrawals, still only had one nights sleep since last Tuesday!
Thanks for the advice
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Originally Posted by Jojay
Hi Fripfrop.I've been following your story and really feel for you.You need an advocate to support you at the moment.You have far to much to cope with.Google an organisation named 'Christians against Poverty'~C.A.P.This is an English organisation and available to all,regardless of having a faith etc.They will be your voice when dealing with your catch 22 situations with The Department For Work and Pensions etc.They also nurture a person as a whole,for as long as you need.Much the same as AA indeed do.Take care and stay close to SR.
I don't know if I'm looking at the wrong thing...but thank you for sending it
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Originally Posted by fripfrop
Jojay I googled this, and in the uk it's a debt counceling service. I'm not in any debt ..it's just basic living expences Im struggling with.
I don't know if I'm looking at the wrong thing...but thank you for sending it
I don't know if I'm looking at the wrong thing...but thank you for sending it
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You are right! I have to keep reminding myself..I'm the new pro-active me now!
I would never accept any help in the past..look where that has taken me ha
I think it will take a lot of practice though haha
While I am waiting for that recovery team to get in touch (you can't contact them)
I am going to a nearby AA meeting tonight, I am going to a SMART meeting tomorrow afternoon, and I have my Alan Carrs Give up Drinking on my kindle.
And after trawling through all my boxes of books..I have found Trimpeys AVRT book I bought yonks ago.
I am also going to ask the doctor this afternoon about Campral, or something to guard against the OCD thinking that always kicks in when I have stopped drinking before.
Surely I must be able to patch something together for the outlines of a plan with that lot?
I would never accept any help in the past..look where that has taken me ha
I think it will take a lot of practice though haha
While I am waiting for that recovery team to get in touch (you can't contact them)
I am going to a nearby AA meeting tonight, I am going to a SMART meeting tomorrow afternoon, and I have my Alan Carrs Give up Drinking on my kindle.
And after trawling through all my boxes of books..I have found Trimpeys AVRT book I bought yonks ago.
I am also going to ask the doctor this afternoon about Campral, or something to guard against the OCD thinking that always kicks in when I have stopped drinking before.
Surely I must be able to patch something together for the outlines of a plan with that lot?
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Well, all thoughts of any kind of unhealthy treats are out after visit to doctor.
If he said once "Your cholestoral is so high you could have a heart attack"..he said it 10 times.
I have 6 weeks to try to lower it, or it's statins for me..if I don't have a heart attack first of course!
He stressed me out so much saying it, by the time he measured my heart rate, it was 103!! I knew it was high, cos I could feel it getting higher, the more he was pushing home the cholestoral point.
So another ECG at the surgery tomorrow.
Told him about the tablets making me feel ill, so he said take half a one..so I'm ok with that.
I didn't like the full one, cos it made me feel like I do when Im drunk!
Ill
I told him I couldn't sleep, and he said he wouldn't give me anything, not even for one night
Said it takes weeks for the alcohol to leave your body, cos it's in your fat cells and everywhere
Asked if I could buy some over the counter sleep aids..he said no, it puts your heart rate up because they are just old fashioned anti-histamines.
So..for the next 6 weeks, no saturated fat, no sugar, cut down on carbohydrates.
I'm having black-eyed bean and mung bean soup for tea..with a little potatoe and some spinach..yum..not!!
But at least he explained things better to me
If he said once "Your cholestoral is so high you could have a heart attack"..he said it 10 times.
I have 6 weeks to try to lower it, or it's statins for me..if I don't have a heart attack first of course!
He stressed me out so much saying it, by the time he measured my heart rate, it was 103!! I knew it was high, cos I could feel it getting higher, the more he was pushing home the cholestoral point.
So another ECG at the surgery tomorrow.
Told him about the tablets making me feel ill, so he said take half a one..so I'm ok with that.
I didn't like the full one, cos it made me feel like I do when Im drunk!
Ill
I told him I couldn't sleep, and he said he wouldn't give me anything, not even for one night
Said it takes weeks for the alcohol to leave your body, cos it's in your fat cells and everywhere
Asked if I could buy some over the counter sleep aids..he said no, it puts your heart rate up because they are just old fashioned anti-histamines.
So..for the next 6 weeks, no saturated fat, no sugar, cut down on carbohydrates.
I'm having black-eyed bean and mung bean soup for tea..with a little potatoe and some spinach..yum..not!!
But at least he explained things better to me
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Check out some of the recipe ideas on the Slimming world website. Very healthy, balanced but VERY tasty.
My partner has to take statins. Has taken them for years, as, after trying loads of things re diet (at the time he was vegetarian so quite healthy anyway) they realised that he has a condition whereby his body generates the cholesterol. Who'd have guessed that one?! Anyway. He's not keen on taking medication for the rest of his life, but the stations aren't debilitating in any way, so he's accepted that as a far better alterative than putting pressure on his other organs.
Sounds like the appointment, while not necessarily bringing good news, was more positive than the last one. I hope that was the case.
Good luck at your meeting tonight. Check in and let us know how it went ☺x
My partner has to take statins. Has taken them for years, as, after trying loads of things re diet (at the time he was vegetarian so quite healthy anyway) they realised that he has a condition whereby his body generates the cholesterol. Who'd have guessed that one?! Anyway. He's not keen on taking medication for the rest of his life, but the stations aren't debilitating in any way, so he's accepted that as a far better alterative than putting pressure on his other organs.
Sounds like the appointment, while not necessarily bringing good news, was more positive than the last one. I hope that was the case.
Good luck at your meeting tonight. Check in and let us know how it went ☺x
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Will do, thank you, leaving in a minute.
Yes, thats the kind of cholestarol that is high in all of our family, that produced by the liver, not dietry.
My mother is also very health conscious, never smoked, drank ate healthily lots of excercise and her level got up to 8.5 before she went on statins.
So although I don't have much hope of bringing mine down by diet..at least Ill get it down as far as I can, just to try to repair what damage I can elsewhere in my body.
Right I'm off..will give an update about the meeting either tonight or tomorrow
Yes, thats the kind of cholestarol that is high in all of our family, that produced by the liver, not dietry.
My mother is also very health conscious, never smoked, drank ate healthily lots of excercise and her level got up to 8.5 before she went on statins.
So although I don't have much hope of bringing mine down by diet..at least Ill get it down as far as I can, just to try to repair what damage I can elsewhere in my body.
Right I'm off..will give an update about the meeting either tonight or tomorrow
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Originally Posted by fripfrop
Jojay I googled this, and in the uk it's a debt counceling service. I'm not in any debt ..it's just basic living expences Im struggling with.
I don't know if I'm looking at the wrong thing...but thank you for sending it
I don't know if I'm looking at the wrong thing...but thank you for sending it
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I will give them a ring Jojay..cheers
Berrybean..when I get my money on Thursday..Im going to give some of those recipes on slimming world a go, looks like they beat mung bean soup anyday haha.
My mother has no bother with the statins either, like your partner, I don't know why I'm being stubborn about them..I think I read too much "conspiracy" junk on the internet haha.
They were made especially for people whose bodies produce too much cholestoral, which diet won't fix, I should just be grateful its not back in my grandparents day, they all died young (on both sides) of heart attacks, and nothing they could do about it then.
The AA meeting went fine last night. Going to a Smart one this afternoon.
The people there were not like the lot that were there years ago ..the chairperson wasn't drunk for a start haha
No, seriously, it's early days, no pressure from anyone to "get stuck into the program" yet. A couple of women gave me their number incase I wanted to talk.
The meetings have become much more structured than what they were before..then again the last time I went they had descended into anarchy where I am haha
They were very nice and welcoming, I enjoyed it. Will go again, although don't think theres a local one for a few more days.
Berrybean..when I get my money on Thursday..Im going to give some of those recipes on slimming world a go, looks like they beat mung bean soup anyday haha.
My mother has no bother with the statins either, like your partner, I don't know why I'm being stubborn about them..I think I read too much "conspiracy" junk on the internet haha.
They were made especially for people whose bodies produce too much cholestoral, which diet won't fix, I should just be grateful its not back in my grandparents day, they all died young (on both sides) of heart attacks, and nothing they could do about it then.
The AA meeting went fine last night. Going to a Smart one this afternoon.
The people there were not like the lot that were there years ago ..the chairperson wasn't drunk for a start haha
No, seriously, it's early days, no pressure from anyone to "get stuck into the program" yet. A couple of women gave me their number incase I wanted to talk.
The meetings have become much more structured than what they were before..then again the last time I went they had descended into anarchy where I am haha
They were very nice and welcoming, I enjoyed it. Will go again, although don't think theres a local one for a few more days.
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Sounds like youre doing well at the moment. Willingness and action combo should be powerful stuff. Will check back later. Just didn't want to read and run. At work getting ready for my amazing and interesting (but challenging ) new class to arrive. Gahhh! Lol
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Off to the doctors for another ECG
Before the last binge I went on, there was not all this immediate concern about my heart.
It just must show, that even a 6 day long binge can add a lot of damage to the damage that must have already been there, but not so obvious.
Imagine another 6 day constant vodka binge..I really do believe the doctors now when they say that it would be enough to finish me off!
Funnily enough..this has taken away all desire to drink ha
Before the last binge I went on, there was not all this immediate concern about my heart.
It just must show, that even a 6 day long binge can add a lot of damage to the damage that must have already been there, but not so obvious.
Imagine another 6 day constant vodka binge..I really do believe the doctors now when they say that it would be enough to finish me off!
Funnily enough..this has taken away all desire to drink ha
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Originally Posted by Berrybean
Sounds like youre doing well at the moment. Willingness and action combo should be powerful stuff. Will check back later. Just didn't want to read and run. At work getting ready for my amazing and interesting (but challenging ) new class to arrive. Gahhh! Lol
Have fun at work haha
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I will give that doctor 10 out of 10 for his observational skills..he said yesterday "And you are getting fat and need to lose some wieght"
I just went to put a jumper on I haven't worn in a while..and I think the washer has shrunk it!..not haha..can't even move my arms in it!
I have been so drunk/hungover..drunk/hungover for so long and just been wearing various baggy bits of rags, that I haven't even noticed half the stuff in my wardrobe doesn't fit!
I just went to put a jumper on I haven't worn in a while..and I think the washer has shrunk it!..not haha..can't even move my arms in it!
I have been so drunk/hungover..drunk/hungover for so long and just been wearing various baggy bits of rags, that I haven't even noticed half the stuff in my wardrobe doesn't fit!
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Been for another ECG..thats still ok, but think thats just to do with the rythmn of the heart.
It's the "how blocked are your arteries" test I am dreading..but no appointment for that yet. No word from recovery team either..but thats government funded..and waiting for that sort of thing can take forever, as anything that the government has a hand in. Unless you owe them money, then they get their bureaucratic crap together with the speed of light!
Been to my SMART meeting..loved it. Did a "cost benefit analyse" The whole group took part. Amazing what some people thought the "benefits" of drinking were..amazing how all the costs of everyone were basically the same!
Like both AA and SMART. Find AA meetings more emotional, and SMART more analytical. Perfect.
But found people at both meetings to be very warm and very open.
Am 24 hours into my imposed low fat cholestarol diet. I went for a nap earlier, and had a dream about a Greggs sausage roll..not even joking!
It was torture waiting for the bus outside of Greggs this morning, watching people coming out with all those pasties..I LUUURVE their cheese pasties..have about a years worth of saturated fat in the pastry though haha
Slept for 11 hours last night (yes AND a nap earlier!)
Had a brainwave, as everything I asked the doctor about that could help me to sleep he said "Itll put your heartrate up" I thought about those lethal betablockers!!
So I had a bath and took it then, last night. Went to sleep no problem.
And now Ive broken the hyper-can't-sleep cycle, I feel like I could go to bed now and sleep till morning.
But I'm babysitting tonight.
I bet they have left me some delicious pizza, and I can't have it
I swear to God I'm turning into Homer Simpson thinking about junk food all the time! What will I be like after a week?
I'll be mugging people coming out of Greggs for their pasties!
It's the "how blocked are your arteries" test I am dreading..but no appointment for that yet. No word from recovery team either..but thats government funded..and waiting for that sort of thing can take forever, as anything that the government has a hand in. Unless you owe them money, then they get their bureaucratic crap together with the speed of light!
Been to my SMART meeting..loved it. Did a "cost benefit analyse" The whole group took part. Amazing what some people thought the "benefits" of drinking were..amazing how all the costs of everyone were basically the same!
Like both AA and SMART. Find AA meetings more emotional, and SMART more analytical. Perfect.
But found people at both meetings to be very warm and very open.
Am 24 hours into my imposed low fat cholestarol diet. I went for a nap earlier, and had a dream about a Greggs sausage roll..not even joking!
It was torture waiting for the bus outside of Greggs this morning, watching people coming out with all those pasties..I LUUURVE their cheese pasties..have about a years worth of saturated fat in the pastry though haha
Slept for 11 hours last night (yes AND a nap earlier!)
Had a brainwave, as everything I asked the doctor about that could help me to sleep he said "Itll put your heartrate up" I thought about those lethal betablockers!!
So I had a bath and took it then, last night. Went to sleep no problem.
And now Ive broken the hyper-can't-sleep cycle, I feel like I could go to bed now and sleep till morning.
But I'm babysitting tonight.
I bet they have left me some delicious pizza, and I can't have it
I swear to God I'm turning into Homer Simpson thinking about junk food all the time! What will I be like after a week?
I'll be mugging people coming out of Greggs for their pasties!
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Im going to give an honest truth that i have learned.
When your DR says getting off your arse and work and you will feel better and or it will help; that is absolutely true. Getting some kind of activity like work, school, sports, outdoor hobbies rewlly helps your mental state. Sound like you are on unemployment benefits and those rules are strict. They dont want people collecting money for not woeking. But if you are not happy with your doctor it is time to get a new one...
When your DR says getting off your arse and work and you will feel better and or it will help; that is absolutely true. Getting some kind of activity like work, school, sports, outdoor hobbies rewlly helps your mental state. Sound like you are on unemployment benefits and those rules are strict. They dont want people collecting money for not woeking. But if you are not happy with your doctor it is time to get a new one...
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Slimming world have a great little Fakeaways recipe book that's worth getting your mitts on. May be worth browsing online to see if you can buy a copy that way.
Cheat pizza I do using the quorn fillets instead of bread base (or a wholemeal pitta) with spicy veggies and jalapeño and topped with half fat cheese, it's lovely (just spray the top of the low fat cheese with fry light or similar before you put it in the overnight as that stops it scorching ).
Well done on trying SMART as well. You're arse has well and truly been in gear this week. Top marks!! ��
Cheat pizza I do using the quorn fillets instead of bread base (or a wholemeal pitta) with spicy veggies and jalapeño and topped with half fat cheese, it's lovely (just spray the top of the low fat cheese with fry light or similar before you put it in the overnight as that stops it scorching ).
Well done on trying SMART as well. You're arse has well and truly been in gear this week. Top marks!! ��
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I appreciate the honest truth.
If I could that easily walk into a job I would. I have been looking for 3 years.
I have been for 15 interviews.
I have worked from being 15 to being 50, then made redundant
I have had to work for the dole money for 6 months...35 hours for £70 benefits
Plus 10 hours job search a week.
Now, depression and the drinking got out of hand, and I need to get better, not sit for 35 hours a week "jobsearching"..when I doubt I could even hold down a job at the minute.
It's not a case of "What, you have a job I could have, I don't want it"
It's a case of I am 53 now, was in a mess with depression and the drink, and couldn't get to the meetings that were keeping me well.
If I could that easily walk into a job I would. I have been looking for 3 years.
I have been for 15 interviews.
I have worked from being 15 to being 50, then made redundant
I have had to work for the dole money for 6 months...35 hours for £70 benefits
Plus 10 hours job search a week.
Now, depression and the drinking got out of hand, and I need to get better, not sit for 35 hours a week "jobsearching"..when I doubt I could even hold down a job at the minute.
It's not a case of "What, you have a job I could have, I don't want it"
It's a case of I am 53 now, was in a mess with depression and the drink, and couldn't get to the meetings that were keeping me well.
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