GhostFace

I've lost alot of friends due to my sobriety and only have one that encourages me and supports what im doing. My workouts are great and people are noticing the changes in my body. It feels great and i love the confidence it give me. I walk with my head high and chest out. The last few workouts i had to force myself and in one session i got a bad anxiety attack due to my grandmothers death but i managed to get through.

Yesterday i had anxiety but i told myself that i will not let anxiety get the best of me and forced myself to the gym. I almost broke down yesterday and just wanted to quit everything but now i see that God is putting me through these tough times to force me to grow as a person and to step out of my comfort zone.

GhostFace

She is the one that brought up all the family thing. I'm still surprised at how fast she was moving. Within days she wanted to meet my family, told me how good of a guy i am and that she enjoys my company. I'm an emotional mess right now and need to think more logically instead of handling situation emotionally.

GhostFace

Update: Thank you all for your support. I was very active in this forum in my early recovery stages and thought that i had everything under control. The urges to drink do not come up as they did when i first started this Journey but that thought does pop up that one day i could drink moderately. I know its false and need to be careful. The lady that Im talking to right now does drink and is impressed that I don't. She actually finds it attractive.

Im 6 month's sober, lost my Grandmother and started dating a beautiful, intelligent women. My concern is, is it to early to start a relationship? She's 39 and i just turned 30 and she has done alot for herself as far as career, traveling, been through two divorce and still going strong. My story is different. For the past 15 years I was abusing drugs, alcohol and i had made a tremoundos change in the last 6 months. She does not know that. All she see is a handsome, family oriented young man that works hard and is providing for his family. She also said that she sees that im sad and hurt from whats going on.

My question is: Is it too early to start dating? I meet her before my grandma passed away and comfort me in time of need but slowly i feel that she is departing from me. I dont know if its me or her but im going through the motions.

SoberLeigh

(((GhostFace)))); I am so sorry about your grandmother.

My only advice about your new relationship is to take it very slow; get to really know each other before you give your beautiful heart away.

kittycat3

You are the only person who could answer that, but I can say to go slow and don't rush, you've been through a lot and need to put yourself first!

Meraviglioso

Hey GF, just wanted to check in, how are you feeling?

maimaitreya

Take everything slow. Do not project into the future with fantasies of possible future outcomes. Stay in the moment and enjoy each moment. Only you know what is right for you. Patience and sobriety first are our priority today.

GhostFace

This week was a sure way to test my sobriety. Everywhere i went there was alcohol and almost gave in to relapse. The only thing that held me back was my will power, but i did put myself into some tempting situations like going to a club on Friday.

I guess im just trying to keep my mind occupied. It so much that i could do since my license is still suspended and my only means of entertainment is the gym.

Me and my female friend are taking it one day at a time. She has two kids and alot of responsibility. Me on the other hand, im single, going through a transformation and braking destructive habits that i picked up in the last 15 years. I need to focus on me and always make myself a priority.

It sucks that she invited me to her friends house that is 1 hour away from were i live and i had to declined due to my license but she knows and understands my situation. I don't know what Im getting myself into but i will take it slow, work with her on my terms and not let her brake my routine.

Thank you !

firstymer

Rf

Dee74

Hey GF

Glad you got through - but my advice is not to put yourself in testing situations if you can help it.

If you're still thinking about this in terms of willpower there's going to be times when you're tired, sick, angry, bored or whatever - and those are the kind of times that can break our will.

How are you coming along with accepting you're an alcoholic and you can't drink if you want a different kind of life?

I think that's the real key to lasting recovery?

D

Babescake

I agree with what Dee posted above me. I also think you need to take this relationship slow. Not just for you, but for the children of the woman you met. They don't deserve to be around someone that drinks. I'm stating this as someone with a child, and trying to get sober myself. It's hard enough for kids to see their parents in relationships outside of their mom/dad. Don't bring your issues into the mix. I know you won't do it purposely, but just like alcohol, it could sneak in easily. It is great you have a good length of sobriety time laid out already. I just hope you can make it continue. Though I give you applause, you made it through some hard times so that was a good test. Keep working and I'm sure you can serve as a great role model in the future. Adding kids is always a complicated mixture.

GhostFace

You are absolutely right. I've gain so much positive from not drinking that i cant turn back to the bottle. I know that if i take that first drink im going to fall harder than ever. Im going through some life changing experience right now and also went on a date six months into my sobriety. I havent dated in over 5 years, so thats a big plus that someone would find the sober side of me interesting.

I just need to focus on myself a bit more before i commit to someone. I ve been through so much this past week and somehow i manage to keep it moving. Something is telling me that i am stronger than i think.

Im going to take it slow and not let my emotion get the best of me. Think more logically and see where things are going.