So this is how terrible I am
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Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 770
Hi everyone!
Sorry for having been so difficult. But I'm doing better now. Yesterday I did what I thought was impossible. I threw the rest of my beer out and went to bed.
I slept well too.
I know the question about my plan will come up. Well, I had 5 weeks sober last year until I slipped up at New Year's Eve. I drank a little bit of champagne thinking it couldn't hurt. It did, as I have demonstrated clearly last month.
Whenever I just don't think about drinking that much, I tend to stay sober much more easily. So an intensive plan might be counter-productive. Alcohol is on my mind all the time then. When I just move on, with a couple of safety measures in place, I can let it go.
So the "plan" is: not drinking and moving on. Living life. Making it a good life. Focusing on that.
The 5 weeks DID end in a relapse though. So there the idea that one drink can't hurt is in the trash can. Had I done that the first time, I would have about 9 weeks sober now.
The second place that needs a safety measure is the first 3 weeks. That's where it was the most difficult for me. After that it got a lot easier. The safety measure for that is to post here if it's difficult BEFORE I drink.
The third place that needs a safety measure is past 5 weeks, which is an unknown for me. I don't know what to expect. Being careful and mindful is the plan for that.
Actually, being mindful is part of my whole sobriety. Even in the 5 weeks, unexpected things can happen. Things I can't predict. I'm going to cultivate a healthy, balanced state of being mindful and careful, which is relaxed. I know that if I make it intense and/or stressful, I will start over-focusing on alcohol again, which will make the state counter-productive.
So that's it. Thank you all for your help, especially since it took so long and I was very difficult.
There's one other thing I want to ask about but it fits best in in a separate thread, so you'll see it there.
Sorry for having been so difficult. But I'm doing better now. Yesterday I did what I thought was impossible. I threw the rest of my beer out and went to bed.
I slept well too.
I know the question about my plan will come up. Well, I had 5 weeks sober last year until I slipped up at New Year's Eve. I drank a little bit of champagne thinking it couldn't hurt. It did, as I have demonstrated clearly last month.
Whenever I just don't think about drinking that much, I tend to stay sober much more easily. So an intensive plan might be counter-productive. Alcohol is on my mind all the time then. When I just move on, with a couple of safety measures in place, I can let it go.
So the "plan" is: not drinking and moving on. Living life. Making it a good life. Focusing on that.
The 5 weeks DID end in a relapse though. So there the idea that one drink can't hurt is in the trash can. Had I done that the first time, I would have about 9 weeks sober now.
The second place that needs a safety measure is the first 3 weeks. That's where it was the most difficult for me. After that it got a lot easier. The safety measure for that is to post here if it's difficult BEFORE I drink.
The third place that needs a safety measure is past 5 weeks, which is an unknown for me. I don't know what to expect. Being careful and mindful is the plan for that.
Actually, being mindful is part of my whole sobriety. Even in the 5 weeks, unexpected things can happen. Things I can't predict. I'm going to cultivate a healthy, balanced state of being mindful and careful, which is relaxed. I know that if I make it intense and/or stressful, I will start over-focusing on alcohol again, which will make the state counter-productive.
So that's it. Thank you all for your help, especially since it took so long and I was very difficult.
There's one other thing I want to ask about but it fits best in in a separate thread, so you'll see it there.
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