Heading into Sober Living facility in 24 hours Keep me in prayers
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Join Date: May 2015
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Thank You Solarion! It is so scary. I hope this experience makes me a stronger man.
Originally Posted by Solarion 
Sounds like a brave but smart thing to do, given the situation you described. Wishing you the best!
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True! And I think being around the dog every day will allow me to get over a very unnecessary fear. At first, I think I will be scared but as time goes on I will have to adjust...
Originally Posted by biminiblue
Oh, my goodness.. I love dogs.
They wouldn't have a mean dog at a sober living place.
More importantly, dogs are mirrors. They will reflect back to you whatever emotion you are aiming at them. Aim love and acceptance, that's what you'll be getting in return. Aim fear, and they will react with either fear or avoidance or dominance - none of which you want.
Love and acceptance.
That's actually a good approach to everyone, you get back what you put out with most people and dogs. Only the very disturbed will reply to love with fear or aggression. I'm talking people now.
They absolutely would not have a disturbed dog at sober living. Assume he/she will be a kind soul - because that is what he/she will definitely be!
They wouldn't have a mean dog at a sober living place.
More importantly, dogs are mirrors. They will reflect back to you whatever emotion you are aiming at them. Aim love and acceptance, that's what you'll be getting in return. Aim fear, and they will react with either fear or avoidance or dominance - none of which you want.
Love and acceptance.
That's actually a good approach to everyone, you get back what you put out with most people and dogs. Only the very disturbed will reply to love with fear or aggression. I'm talking people now.
They absolutely would not have a disturbed dog at sober living. Assume he/she will be a kind soul - because that is what he/she will definitely be!
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Thank You Fly N Buy! I have to put everything in my life on hold and simply leave NY. I hope the AA community in the sober living community I am going to gives me the strength I need to simply LIVE. I hope God protects me and faith always stays with me. I will miss my mom & niece dearly but if I want to make something of my life I have to do this. I am terrified beyond words but my heart tells me "Skywalker, you have to do this in order to be a good father one day and a good son, uncle, brother) This may limit me on how fast I get my masters/advanced degrees BUT it enables me to make sure the rest of my 20's and all my 30's do not include alchhol or drugs. Who knows I might find a new passion when I am there?
And guys this might turn out to be a place that is not good for me but I have to faith that it will turn out positive. I have seen individuals on there facebook page finish the program and are now self-sufficient and going after their dreams and staying sober in their new location. If they can do it I hope I can do it.
And guys this might turn out to be a place that is not good for me but I have to faith that it will turn out positive. I have seen individuals on there facebook page finish the program and are now self-sufficient and going after their dreams and staying sober in their new location. If they can do it I hope I can do it.
Originally Posted by Fly N Buy
That's awesome - good for you on taking the action. SL can be life changing experience. Can't wait for an update.........
peace
peace
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Thank You Dharma I hope it is a welcoming environment
Originally Posted by Dharma33
That is wonderful, Skywalker!!! You should be very proud of your decision to do whatever it takes!
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Attachment 28638
Trudgin
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 6,348
Originally Posted by skywalker91
Thank You Fly N Buy! I have to put everything in my life on hold and simply leave NY. I hope the AA community in the sober living community I am going to gives me the strength I need to simply LIVE. I hope God protects me and faith always stays with me. I will miss my mom & niece dearly but if I want to make something of my life I have to do this. I am terrified beyond words but my heart tells me "Skywalker, you have to do this in order to be a good father one day and a good son, uncle, brother) This may limit me on how fast I get my masters/advanced degrees BUT it enables me to make sure the rest of my 20's and all my 30's do not include alchhol or drugs. Who knows I might find a new passion when I am there?
And guys this might turn out to be a place that is not good for me but I have to faith that it will turn out positive. I have seen individuals on there facebook page finish the program and are now self-sufficient and going after their dreams and staying sober in their new location. If they can do it I hope I can do it.
And guys this might turn out to be a place that is not good for me but I have to faith that it will turn out positive. I have seen individuals on there facebook page finish the program and are now self-sufficient and going after their dreams and staying sober in their new location. If they can do it I hope I can do it.
When we learn to live in faith and not in fear the outcome is certain. Some say we cannot do both at the same time, my experience is true. But, it takes work for people like us~!
When I set my expectations aside and simply do the best I can with what's right in front of me life is pretty easy. When I set expectations high and have this "vision" I am typically disappointed.
By no means should this be taken as - gee, whatever happens, happens - certainly not. For me it means I take the action in faith and leave the results up to the God of my understanding. In that regard there can be no failure.
Fellowships are great and I certainly love the different groups I attend and am engaged in - the unity is indeed powerful! However, when I draw on my HP, and understand that even in my weakness - with my infirmities - He will never foresake me - then I have all the strength I need freely given to me, by grace. He knows every hair on your head.......
Strong thoughts and prayesr for His will to satisfy your needs, friend
peace
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Amazing and beautifully put. I LOVE THIS. This put everything into perspective for me. I wish you the best Fly N Buy.
Originally Posted by Fly N Buy
Skywalker,
When we learn to live in faith and not in fear the outcome is certain. Some say we cannot do both at the same time, my experience is true. But, it takes work for people like us~!
When I set my expectations aside and simply do the best I can with what's right in front of me life is pretty easy. When I set expectations high and have this "vision" I am typically disappointed.
By no means should this be taken as - gee, whatever happens, happens - certainly not. For me it means I take the action in faith and leave the results up to the God of my understanding. In that regard there can be no failure.
Fellowships are great and I certainly love the different groups I attend and am engaged in - the unity is indeed powerful! However, when I draw on my HP, and understand that even in my weakness - with my infirmities - He will never foresake me - then I have all the strength I need freely given to me, by grace. He knows every hair on your head.......
Strong thoughts and prayesr for His will to satisfy your needs, friend
peace
When we learn to live in faith and not in fear the outcome is certain. Some say we cannot do both at the same time, my experience is true. But, it takes work for people like us~!
When I set my expectations aside and simply do the best I can with what's right in front of me life is pretty easy. When I set expectations high and have this "vision" I am typically disappointed.
By no means should this be taken as - gee, whatever happens, happens - certainly not. For me it means I take the action in faith and leave the results up to the God of my understanding. In that regard there can be no failure.
Fellowships are great and I certainly love the different groups I attend and am engaged in - the unity is indeed powerful! However, when I draw on my HP, and understand that even in my weakness - with my infirmities - He will never foresake me - then I have all the strength I need freely given to me, by grace. He knows every hair on your head.......
Strong thoughts and prayesr for His will to satisfy your needs, friend
peace
You can have reasons, or you can have results, but you can't have both.
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Syracuse, NY
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Skywalker, if you are able to tell us about your experience, your story will encourage others who may be considering this step.
I'm sure that once you're there, you will be warmly welcomed and greatly relieved to be "safe" from the negative influences you had before.
I'm sure that once you're there, you will be warmly welcomed and greatly relieved to be "safe" from the negative influences you had before.
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I have missed you all so much. It's been intense. So I went to the sober living in California. It turned out to be a facility with not much structure. We were allowed to have our phones and computer. The staff was not there 24/7. Moreover, my roommate had just relapsed right before I arrived. I gave it almost 2 weeks until yes I relapsed in the one place I thought would never use. It was a big blow to everything. If you guys recall I was sober 8 months prior and relapsed in NY then spent a good chunk of my savings to go back to LA where I had a bunch of AA buddies only to relapse when I got there 
I even checked out another sober living facility while I was out there and it turned out to have 3 large dogs ( phobia). I reconnected with a good chunk of my AA buddies that I spent almost 2 years missing. There was also a guy I met in AA back when I was in LA that I tried to reconnect with. He seemed very busy and it broke my heart that he didn't really make as much of an effort to meet me as I did. I booked my ticket back to NY and my first weekend back here I used again. Then, I checked out an AA meeting out in Manhattan. I felt great. Then as I was planning to go to a second meeting yesterday my old using buddy texted me and I ended up using instead. I humiliated myself yesterday. I don't know how I returned into the vicious cycle. What I did learn finally is that a geographic doesn't necessarily fix everything. I also learned that I have to stop blaming others and that this is ultimately my choice. I know myself and going to a meeting on my own just isn't something that I have the strength for right now. I feel like I will use if I do go outside. I realized that I want to stay home for at least a full 30 days before I even begin to try meetings again. I know AA isn't the only way to stay sober but I will try it out again when I have more clean time. As far as staying home it will work because my mom is home everyday as my dad has Parkinson's and she is the caretaker. And if she does go out she is happy to take me with her. Also, I reconnected with my cousins that have been extremely supportive as soon as I got back to NY. I have been feeling like garbage and have utterly reached the point where I don't want to use ever again. Going to LA and ending up in a sober living that caused more problems than solutions taught me that I can't keep running away. Help will be there if I want it. And the drugs and alcohol will be there if I want it. WHEREVER I go. I think finding a therapist is pivotal for me so I will look into that as well. However as of now I will stay home and aim to get to 30 days. I've missed SR and will start writing here again. Can you guys please recommend how to pass time in the early days of sobriety? I decided to hold off on returning to work and school right now until I get to a decent amount of time clean. Keep in prayers you guys.
Also I don't want my experience in this sober living I went stop anyone from going to one. I have been to an amazing sober living once out in LA which is why I wanted to return to LA. Unfortunately this sober living was just not a match for me due to the lack of structure and the one I attended before is just too darn expensive.
I even checked out another sober living facility while I was out there and it turned out to have 3 large dogs ( phobia). I reconnected with a good chunk of my AA buddies that I spent almost 2 years missing. There was also a guy I met in AA back when I was in LA that I tried to reconnect with. He seemed very busy and it broke my heart that he didn't really make as much of an effort to meet me as I did. I booked my ticket back to NY and my first weekend back here I used again. Then, I checked out an AA meeting out in Manhattan. I felt great. Then as I was planning to go to a second meeting yesterday my old using buddy texted me and I ended up using instead. I humiliated myself yesterday. I don't know how I returned into the vicious cycle. What I did learn finally is that a geographic doesn't necessarily fix everything. I also learned that I have to stop blaming others and that this is ultimately my choice. I know myself and going to a meeting on my own just isn't something that I have the strength for right now. I feel like I will use if I do go outside. I realized that I want to stay home for at least a full 30 days before I even begin to try meetings again. I know AA isn't the only way to stay sober but I will try it out again when I have more clean time. As far as staying home it will work because my mom is home everyday as my dad has Parkinson's and she is the caretaker. And if she does go out she is happy to take me with her. Also, I reconnected with my cousins that have been extremely supportive as soon as I got back to NY. I have been feeling like garbage and have utterly reached the point where I don't want to use ever again. Going to LA and ending up in a sober living that caused more problems than solutions taught me that I can't keep running away. Help will be there if I want it. And the drugs and alcohol will be there if I want it. WHEREVER I go. I think finding a therapist is pivotal for me so I will look into that as well. However as of now I will stay home and aim to get to 30 days. I've missed SR and will start writing here again. Can you guys please recommend how to pass time in the early days of sobriety? I decided to hold off on returning to work and school right now until I get to a decent amount of time clean. Keep in prayers you guys.Also I don't want my experience in this sober living I went stop anyone from going to one. I have been to an amazing sober living once out in LA which is why I wanted to return to LA. Unfortunately this sober living was just not a match for me due to the lack of structure and the one I attended before is just too darn expensive.
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