The Stare Down.... dun dun dun!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,238
In order to remain sober after entering
recovery 25 yrs. ago and completing a
28 day rehab stay and 6 week outpatient
aftercare program, and all that was taught
to me, I had to surrender any and all ideas
or thoughts that I could ever drink successfully
in my life again.
Today, I still firmly believe that I can
never drink successfully and continue
to live a healthy, happy, honest life
incorporating a program of recovery
in all my affairs.
Incorperating a recovery program to
ones life is a wonderful, awesome gift
and effective treatment for a treatable
disease, illness and addiction .
recovery 25 yrs. ago and completing a
28 day rehab stay and 6 week outpatient
aftercare program, and all that was taught
to me, I had to surrender any and all ideas
or thoughts that I could ever drink successfully
in my life again.
Today, I still firmly believe that I can
never drink successfully and continue
to live a healthy, happy, honest life
incorporating a program of recovery
in all my affairs.
Incorperating a recovery program to
ones life is a wonderful, awesome gift
and effective treatment for a treatable
disease, illness and addiction .
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Midwest USA
Posts: 630
Originally Posted by vendetta 
I know I need to go dump it. But I cant. I don't even wanna go look at it. I wish I wouldn't have even brought it home. I just got so down today I felt like I had to have it.
Stay out of the garage tonight & return in the morning when you are stronger!
Behold the power of NO
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: WA
Posts: 7,764
Originally Posted by Upwardspiral
Maybe a friend would be delighted to come by your house and take off your hands?
Do you have any non alcoholic friends you could invite over for pizza or to watch a movie and then just give him/her the alcohol when they leave?
Even better if someone who knows you quit?
Having someone you could talk to about today's and your trouble in person would probably also help you a lot.
I would also suggest that you look into your recovery plan and see where you can tighten up things up or if you need to add something (whether it is face to face support or meditation or whatever else) because this is an awfully close call.
Good going on reaching out to us btw
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 226
It's soo hard. I want it bad. Ive been under so much stress. They are offering all these job opportunities to me at work to make alot more money, but I would have to move away. My parents are at the age where they need me to do more and more. I've had to stop hanging out with all my friends cause we worked hard and played hard and it always starts in a bar. I've been going to church and my values have changed. All of a sudden I want to settle down and have a family. I've realized I can't drink alcohol anymore and be healthy. Its like my world has changed and i have to relearn everything. I dont know how to live this new life. Now I'm at home all the time and I know if I just give in and grab that bottle the feelings of depression and being lost will go away. At least for awhile. And that sounds better then being this miserable.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
I know if I just give in and grab that bottle the feelings of depression and being lost will go away.
Putting the bottle in the garage or waiting for friends to drop by is just a sneaky way for your addiction to keep that bottle in play.
Pour it out, Vendetta.
D
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 4,860
Originally Posted by vendetta
I know I need to go dump it. But I cant.
The problem with having it in your proximity is that you know it's there and that leads to thinking about it. Read all of the posts people have made with wisdom to support you.
Don't you think they're on to something here, Vendetta?
Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Salina, KS
Posts: 49
Originally Posted by vendetta
This voice keeps telling me go ahead. You will at least feel better for a little while.
It still amazes me the power that a bottle of liquid can have over me.
It still amazes me the power that a bottle of liquid can have over me.
We are here, so deep down there is a big part of us that wants to quit and become clean and sober.
This is day two for me too, and we did the right thing in coming here to vent our feelings and reading the post of encouragement of people who have overcome their addictions. You and I can be in that wonderful place a couple of years from now, of helping newcomers the way we are being helped now in our early days of coming off.
Happy Holidays.
Behold the power of NO
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: WA
Posts: 7,764
Getting good opportunities at work, wanting to settle down and have a family, being concerned about your parents aging instead of where the next party is at it's all part of growing up and some of the blessings of sobriety.
It sure beats being sick in your own puke and worrying that you might have said something and lost your job or that you are too hangover to go help your dad clean his gutters.
I post the daily readings on a small forum as a service and here is an extract from today's NA reading: Just for Today. Maybe it will help you a bit.
It sure beats being sick in your own puke and worrying that you might have said something and lost your job or that you are too hangover to go help your dad clean his gutters.
I post the daily readings on a small forum as a service and here is an extract from today's NA reading: Just for Today. Maybe it will help you a bit.
Life is a series of changes, both large and small. Although we may know and accept this fact intellectually, chances are that our initial emotional reaction to change is fear. For some reason, we assume that each and every change is going to hurt, causing us to be miserable.
If we look back on the changes that have happened in our lives, we'll find that most of them have been for the best. We were probably very frightened at the prospect of life without drugs, yet it's the best thing that's ever happened to us. Perhaps we've lost a job that we thought we'd die without, but later on we found greater challenge and personal fulfillment in a new career. As we venture forth in our recovery, we're likely to experience more changes. We will outgrow old situations and become ready for new ones.
With all sorts of changes taking place, it's only natural to grab hold of something, anything familiar and try to hold on. Solace can be found in a Power greater than ourselves. The more we allow changes to happen at the direction of our Higher Power, the more we'll trust that those changes are for the best. Faith will replace fear, and we'll know in our hearts that all will be well.
If we look back on the changes that have happened in our lives, we'll find that most of them have been for the best. We were probably very frightened at the prospect of life without drugs, yet it's the best thing that's ever happened to us. Perhaps we've lost a job that we thought we'd die without, but later on we found greater challenge and personal fulfillment in a new career. As we venture forth in our recovery, we're likely to experience more changes. We will outgrow old situations and become ready for new ones.
With all sorts of changes taking place, it's only natural to grab hold of something, anything familiar and try to hold on. Solace can be found in a Power greater than ourselves. The more we allow changes to happen at the direction of our Higher Power, the more we'll trust that those changes are for the best. Faith will replace fear, and we'll know in our hearts that all will be well.
EndGame
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 4,677
Originally Posted by vendetta
I know I need to go dump it. But I cant. I don't even wanna go look at it.
I wish I wouldn't have even brought it home.
EndGame
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 4,677
Originally Posted by vendetta
I failed I went out in the garage and drank it. It feels awesome. It's like it all went away.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
Originally Posted by vendetta
I failed I went out in the garage and drank it. It feels awesome. It's like it all went away.
Nothing ever 'went away' for me - the best I could hope for was to push stuff to the side - and even that stopped working for me eventually.
Have you thought anymore about counselling or at least finding more support than SR?
D
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 114
You seem to have put a somewhat comedic tone in your thread title and posts but there's nothing funny at all about you drinking that bottle. Go ahead and make jokes if it helps you cope but this is life & death. Hopefully you've now realized what happens when you bring alcohol into your house and take steps to avoid that next time! Because we all want you to stick around. We're all in this fight together
Member
Join Date: Dec 2015
Posts: 309
Hi vendetta
There is so much support on this thread for you and it's a shame you ended up drinking.
Alcohol was a temporary solution for me...very temporary...before I sobered up and had even more stuff to deal with because it meant the next day I was hungover and back on day one.
I hope you can get some sleep and in the morning it might be an idea to check the house and give away any other alcohol.
There is so much support on this thread for you and it's a shame you ended up drinking.
Alcohol was a temporary solution for me...very temporary...before I sobered up and had even more stuff to deal with because it meant the next day I was hungover and back on day one.
I hope you can get some sleep and in the morning it might be an idea to check the house and give away any other alcohol.
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