Grendhar

Thanks Dee,

I'll join that.

Melki, I can see the progression in the sense that I find the amount I usually drink becoming not enough and on occasion I'll risk everything to drive for more..

Pondlady

It really helped me to do something completely different. I also took a lot of long walks to burn off anxiety and get out of the house.

melki

Yup. Sounds very, very familiar...

tomsteve

welp, instead of lookin at day 2 or 3 how bout just lookin at today. dont drink today.
in high school my nickname was shyboy. unless i was atta party drinkin.
gettin into aa and working the steps i learned i wasnt shy. i was living in fear-fear of what others thought of me. pretty crazy that my opinion of what others thought of me was negative and yet in reality others really didnt think of me that often.
it took me quite a bit of courage to open up and talk in meetings. quite a bit of courage to work the steps. that courage to face my fears was well worth it. only good things happened.

PurpleKnight

Welcome to the Forum Brandon!!

BixBees505

I think this is key in the early days. For me, 3rd/4th day was impossible for awhile. It took me several runs at it to get past that first hurdle, because I really didn't want to stop that much. When I became serious, I was able to get past day 4 finally, and then found day 7 to be a problem. Got past that and found that Mondays still kicked my rear end. Now I can get past Mondays, too.

Once I was serious, in each case it was a matter of planning for the next "bad day" while I was in a "good (sober) day".

Grendhar

Bixbees I can relate to what you said. I think I haven't been taking it seriously. When I get up to that 2 and a half days I convince myself that the drinking is innocent somehow.

Drunk driving, neglecting family, neglecting responsibilities, drinking to excess alone day in day out, fall asleep.. repeat next day... not innocent.

This is officially day 1 .. I need to remember my reasons for quitting .. every day .. or I'll disappear into my miserable drinking life again.

AnvilheadII

it is essential that you bolt all doors shut to the idea of being able to drink again successfully. not in 3 days, not in 30, not in 300. and the best and "easiest" way to do that is ONE DAY AT A TIME. just for today i will not drink NO MATTER WHAT. make that commitment to yourself each morning and then as often thru the day as needed.

you've never given yourself enough time to really know what SOBER feels like. so now, in this season of GIVING, give yourself that gift. but know that sober doesn't happen on it's own......we DO have things to do. each of us need to find a program of recovery that works for us and that we can work successfully. be open to ALL options.

Anna

Yes, you have to fight through those thoughts. Of course, the goal of the addiction is to convince you that drinking is fine and safe. You know it isn't, so try to dismiss the thoughts. I used to get stuck on Day 3 too, but the good news is that once I got to Day 4, things got a bit easier.

BixBees505

Grendhar, we all really understand where you are.

Day 1 resolve is strong, but also fraught with unstable emotion. I hope you spend some time today building a plan for staying sober, and become familiar with a set of tools.

Staying stopped is not one thing, it is many things, the increasingly skillful application of what you know about about yourself to the goal of living sober. You can definitely do this.

There are a LOT of tools discussed in the stickies at the top of the Newcomer's forum. Also excellent links to helpful ideas for building a plan.

Please stick around and tell us how you are doing. Post before you drink.

biminiblue

Grendhar, stay here every day.

This place will ruin drinking for ya. Reading the horrible stories, the ruined health and families and losing jobs, homes, life itself. . .it's pretty humbling.

I post every day on the 24 Hour Connections thread, pledging to stay sober today. It's working nearly two years on. Here's the link, won't you join us every day? Just post and read - there is a whole list of those who pledge posted daily on the thread. Use that list as your support group! In early days when I would start obsessing about a drink, I would mentally try to recite as many user names as I could remember and then say, "They would all tell me not to do it!"

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...part-90-a.html

Grendhar

I'm going to go read the links you mentioned bixbees.

Also thinking of giving A.A another try, tomsteve had some good things to say. Also I read some things in the secular connections forum that might help me not have such an issue with the god thing in A.A.

Grendhar

Saw this signature over in the secular forum. I don't think it is exactly this simple but it's still a powerful reminder of what not to do today.

"The only way to stop the cycle is by not drinking - at all. Period."

BixBees505

Excellent, Grendhar. AA successfully encompasses the widest possible points of view. Don't let anything keep you from getting sufficient support. On the other hand, AA is not the only program. Use everything at your disposal...your only goal is to not drink today. Today it is not necessary to fully evolve a unified theory of everything. And tomorrow, rinse and repeat. You need to get past this first hurdle, and then you will see how to take the next hurdle.

MIRecovery

No one said that getting sober was something you would like or that you wouldn't feel uncomfortable. AA does not say you need to believe in God. You only need to believe in something greater than yourself.

I had to get desperate enough that I was willing to do anything to get sober and be willing to listen to what people who had years of sobriety said.

When I did sobriety my way I had a 100% failure rate

SWH1959

Hi Leviathan

I am 4 days sober and you say how I feel
Its good to hear people voice whats in me.
One day at a time got me drunk and I am usingthen same way to get clean . One day at a time
Steve

Nonsensical

How do you know? You've never been sober. The effects of the alcohol aren't out of your system after 2.5 days. The buzz is gone, but the residual effects are still there.

Go 100 days and see how that feels. You might like it more than you realize.

Best of Luck on Your Journey.

carriek

You are just like me...I can't make it more than two days consistently.....I choose to drink although it makes me miserable and am so very tired of living this way. I do not believe in a "God" or higher power that can help me through this, but do believe the support that AA offers can be helpful. There is also SMART recovery which I am looking into and liking the idea of. It's learning why you drink and empowers you with tools to rationalize that it is bad for you and you can deal with your feelings of loneliness, sadness, hurt, etc. in a healthy, non-destructive way. I am not one to give advice as today is only my day one, but feeling hopeful that life can be better! I am hoping for you that you find that too and keep posting. It's helpful to know there are others that have common problems and beliefs

Dee74

Welcome back Carrie

D

Grendhar

Made it through day 1. Tired and know there is no chance I am going anyplace tonight.

Tomorrow will be tough. I've been desiring a drink today but my girlfriend doesn't like me drinking .. definitely helped she was with me. Tomorrow she works and I'll be alone.