The job hunt
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 1,552
The job hunt
When did I become so unhirable? Even in the depths of my addiction and alcoholism I was able to get a job and hold a job. A real job. I called on an application I put in to a local supermarket. I was told I'm "not what they are looking for". It's a supermarket. I'm living, breathing and able to work. What the hell are they looking for? This whole thing sends my head to bad places. I wind up feeling hurt and worthless. I take the rejection very personally. I am such a total alcoholic. Now. I found a place that's hiring and it is pretty awesome of a job. I put the application in today. Let's call it a very fitting job. Please keep your fingers crossed that something happens with it. I really want this job!!!
Jennifer
Jennifer
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
We alcoholics are sensitive people. It takes some of us a long time to outgrow that serious handicap.
Ya know, it could be the supermarket thought you were overqualified, which is what I'm thinking.
It could be that God has something better in store for ya.
Ya know, it could be the supermarket thought you were overqualified, which is what I'm thinking.
It could be that God has something better in store for ya.
Re-Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 7,909
Much like our getting sober, finding a job gets easier the more work we put into it. Paper your town with applications and something will happen.
I would guess "you're not what we're looking for" is just short hand for they're not really hiring right now. Because of possible discrimination lawsuits, etc, most places will accept applications every day of the year even if they have no openings. Don't take it personally if you don't get hired--just keep applying at other places.
Hang in there, Jennifer, the right job will find you if you keep looking. You're in my thoughts and prayers.
I would guess "you're not what we're looking for" is just short hand for they're not really hiring right now. Because of possible discrimination lawsuits, etc, most places will accept applications every day of the year even if they have no openings. Don't take it personally if you don't get hired--just keep applying at other places.
Hang in there, Jennifer, the right job will find you if you keep looking. You're in my thoughts and prayers.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 1,355
Very possible you were overqualified. Its a word job seekers hate but its a word that employers have to live by. This employer (supermarket) is going to spend a lot of time and resources on training you etc. And if they think that this is just a gap filler for you, then they might not think it is worth their time and money to go through all that for you to leave in a few months when a batter job comes around.
its a word as a potential employee that we hate. Because we may know that is what we are looking for, and we may know that we wont be job seeking (or who knows maybe you will be)...
Hope that helps.
its a word as a potential employee that we hate. Because we may know that is what we are looking for, and we may know that we wont be job seeking (or who knows maybe you will be)...
Hope that helps.
Hang on!
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: Ohio
Posts: 181
jryan has a point. You may very well be overqualified. Or they aren't really hiring right now.
My employer has literally dozens of openings listed on their web site. Many of these have been open since last winter. They really aren't too serious about filling these positions for some, and the others they are holding out for the absolutely best candidate on the planet with 3 PhDs willing to work for minimum wage. Or something. I see this as 'make work' for HR or managers trying to keep their headcount up without the impact on their budget of actually paying someone.
Don't take it personally. They don't know you.
My employer has literally dozens of openings listed on their web site. Many of these have been open since last winter. They really aren't too serious about filling these positions for some, and the others they are holding out for the absolutely best candidate on the planet with 3 PhDs willing to work for minimum wage. Or something. I see this as 'make work' for HR or managers trying to keep their headcount up without the impact on their budget of actually paying someone.
Don't take it personally. They don't know you.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 9,029
My thoughts are with you. I haven't tried the job pool for a long time and partially because I'm very afraid of what I will hear. You will do well. Just keep your head up. You are so totally employable. You're smart, funny, compassionate and thoughtful.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 4,251
Jennifer, I follow all of your posts because you are such an inspiration for me. You were new just about the same time as me and I followed your struggles, sow I see you succeeding and I am so happy for you.
I have been out of the US for a while, but from what I hear from friends there is still a big economic crisis. It is terrible but it is what it is. I am so sorry for you because I know you need work but you can't take it personally. There just aren't that many jobs to go around.
I wish you the best of luck though. I know you will find something. Keep at it, try not to take it personally.
I have been out of the US for a while, but from what I hear from friends there is still a big economic crisis. It is terrible but it is what it is. I am so sorry for you because I know you need work but you can't take it personally. There just aren't that many jobs to go around.
I wish you the best of luck though. I know you will find something. Keep at it, try not to take it personally.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Central America/Florida USA
Posts: 4,064
Good luck, Jennifer!
I remember when I got sober, I was looking for work. Applied for a job at the airport baggage claim and was turned down. Also tried for a job as a midnight shift motel clerk and was turned down for that, too. In hindsight, I'm glad I stuck with it and found something that was a perfect fit! You will too! There are lots of "perfect jobs" out there and I'm sure you'll find one of them. Keep it up!
I remember when I got sober, I was looking for work. Applied for a job at the airport baggage claim and was turned down. Also tried for a job as a midnight shift motel clerk and was turned down for that, too. In hindsight, I'm glad I stuck with it and found something that was a perfect fit! You will too! There are lots of "perfect jobs" out there and I'm sure you'll find one of them. Keep it up!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
I'm not really superstitious, but I do believe pretty strongly that most everything happens for a reason. Like someone else said, you may have been overqualified and would have simply been bored at this job, or more realistically, there is a much better opportunity lying right around the corner, you just don't know it yet.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 360
This is largely the experience of most people. I've looked at jobs that seemed so perfect, only to never hear back. I once had a phone interview with a very small company. The CEO called me and seemed to really like what I had to say and said he'd let me know the next steps. I followed up, contacted him a couple of times... Nothing. Never heard back from him, he ignored me and I had to move on. I even knew someone who worked there, whom I had gone to school with, he was an admin there... It seriously seemed like a done deal, I even told my family that I was going to get it... Nothing, it completely fell apart. Never heard back from the guy.
Someone I know, who's identity I will keep confidential was once rejected from a fast food job. This is someone who had years of previous experience in another restaurant. The hiring manager insulted their appearance and accused them of lying about their past experience... Fast forward to now, and that person has been sponsored to work overseas in a foreign country, in a position that is leagues above any food service or retail job, think about that!
No one wants to get rejected for a job, and I think that most people probably keep their feelings on the matter private, and so it's easy to feel like you're being singled out as an undesirable for some reason. Not true.
You can feel sad and upset about it, that is not really in your control. What is in your control is having those nasty conversations in your head. You can choose to have dialogues with yourself that you are worthless, and you can choose not to have those conversations too. In the past I've brought myself to tears thinking like that... It just feeds the feeling and makes it stronger, and it goes in a loop endlessly.
Someone I know, who's identity I will keep confidential was once rejected from a fast food job. This is someone who had years of previous experience in another restaurant. The hiring manager insulted their appearance and accused them of lying about their past experience... Fast forward to now, and that person has been sponsored to work overseas in a foreign country, in a position that is leagues above any food service or retail job, think about that!
No one wants to get rejected for a job, and I think that most people probably keep their feelings on the matter private, and so it's easy to feel like you're being singled out as an undesirable for some reason. Not true.
You can feel sad and upset about it, that is not really in your control. What is in your control is having those nasty conversations in your head. You can choose to have dialogues with yourself that you are worthless, and you can choose not to have those conversations too. In the past I've brought myself to tears thinking like that... It just feeds the feeling and makes it stronger, and it goes in a loop endlessly.
Originally Posted by countrygirl2014 
When did I become so unhirable? Even in the depths of my addiction and alcoholism I was able to get a job and hold a job. A real job. I called on an application I put in to a local supermarket. I was told I'm "not what they are looking for". It's a supermarket. I'm living, breathing and able to work. What the hell are they looking for? This whole thing sends my head to bad places. I wind up feeling hurt and worthless. I take the rejection very personally. I am such a total alcoholic. Now. I found a place that's hiring and it is pretty awesome of a job. I put the application in today. Let's call it a very fitting job. Please keep your fingers crossed that something happens with it. I really want this job!!!
Jennifer
Jennifer
Marchia in Aeternum
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Georgia
Posts: 11,094
It's cold out there, CG! Hard market for us jobseekers.
My dad and I talk about this since we've both owned companies. HR has to keep doing something to keep their jobs but the company can't afford to hire because of the economy.
I'll give you an example: My employer's purchasing agent just left. The president decided to do the work himself instead of hiring.
You need to make HUNDREDS of applications. Send out HUNDREDS of resumes. Take short-term, part-time work to keep money coming in and show that you're not lazy. I was working four part-time, as-needed gigs last year. It impressed people.
Still, they aren't hiring unless they find the perfect person for their plans. And they don't return emails, calls, or letters. It's cold out there.
My dad and I talk about this since we've both owned companies. HR has to keep doing something to keep their jobs but the company can't afford to hire because of the economy.
I'll give you an example: My employer's purchasing agent just left. The president decided to do the work himself instead of hiring.
You need to make HUNDREDS of applications. Send out HUNDREDS of resumes. Take short-term, part-time work to keep money coming in and show that you're not lazy. I was working four part-time, as-needed gigs last year. It impressed people.
Still, they aren't hiring unless they find the perfect person for their plans. And they don't return emails, calls, or letters. It's cold out there.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: SoCal, California
Posts: 990
I'll be out there looking too. My job is leaving me.
It can be a long haul sometimes but I hope you'll get enough strength to keep at it every day until something comes through.
You've got it in you to see this through.
It can be a long haul sometimes but I hope you'll get enough strength to keep at it every day until something comes through.
You've got it in you to see this through.
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