JJ9

I drank again last night. I drank over a fifth of vodka (although I'm not sure exactly how much more because my husband was drinking with me and he drank some of the 2nd bottle). I acted like an A-hole to my husband, cracked up my phone screen and spent the entire day today in bed with the hangover from hell.

I am typing this out for a reminder to myself in the future. I have not even been able to sit up all day. Still now, at almost 10pm the next day, I am completely nauseous and have a splitting headache. I slept through waking my son up and he missed football this morning (probably for the best because I can guarantee I was still wasted at 8am and it would have been very dangerous to drive).

I am so disgusted with myself. I just honestly need to try harder. I read SR every day but I also need to change my life so that it is easier to stay sober. I am going to look for evening activities and volunteer opportunities. I am going to start exercising and truly commit to living sober and living the best life I can.

Thanks for reading and thanks for all of the inspiration you all provide every day. Before I found SR I really didn't think I could stop. Since I have been reading here I have made a ton of improvement but I really need to step it up so I don't have any more of these hideous hangovers and wasted days. I hate the regrets after a night of drinking.

1dayaddatime

I'm new here jj. Actually today is my first day here. Keep trying. Sounds like you have a good plan, now just put it in motion . You gave me a few good ideas as well. Thanks! Good luck!

2WheelsGood

I am by no means a therapist, and tomorrow will only be day 56 for me, but my last day sounded similar to what you describe. I had become a real jerk and I made a scene at my wife. It really woke me up.

My wife and I both quit on the same day, and we both work not to be enablers to each other now. It helps.

ccam1973

JJ, have you thought about a plan to help you stay sober. Ultimately you've got to want to be sober more than you want to drink. A plan will help for when your AV is trying to convince you that you deserve that drink. Plan for the expected and unexpected. You know your body and mind well enough to know what hurdles will be thrown at you to drink.

Bottom line is don't pick up that first drink. You are strong enough to make this change and you won't regret the decision to not drink, I promise.

It does get easier with time.

sleepie

Hi JJ9. That is a lot of vodka. I hope this will be your last hangover. It's good you made progress while here, stepping it up sounds like a great idea. I know that recovery days after drinking are just a waste. Many here find themselves energized and more productive after quitting, maybe that is something you can look forward to. Take care of you, you're worth it

Retread1959

I know the feeling and had a few days like that myself recently. I don't know if there's anything I could say that would help you get past this point. For me it seems to be a matter of finally being fully convinced that continuing this way is going to kill me AND that this is not what I want for my future. I do not want to die, I do not want to grow older with all the infirmities that go along with chronic drinking. Someone above said you have to want to quit more than you want to drink and I guess that might be true for me. I hope you can get to that place soon.

Dee74

Welcome jj9

If you're not sure what to do next or how to restart recovery, just ask - plenty of willing helping hands here

D

Soberwolf

Welcome jj nice to meret you

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-recovery.html

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html

NestWasEmpty

HI jj , Glad you came to SR . Never feel alone in the Crazy things you do while drinking . I don't "think" there is anyone that hasn't regretted things we have done . It's the morning after that was the hardest for me also .
Make you do stuff you would never think of doing , never mind going through with it whilst Sober You can do this & it will get better

jt1234

JJ9, don't forget how you felt yesterday. The hangover, the guilt of not taking your son to football. These are the kind of bad memories and moments that can drive you to stay sober and stick to your plan. My missteps while drinking have motivated me to become and stay sober. Good luck, and keep posting

Ruby2

JJ, thank you for your post because it's a vivid reminder to me.

I had to make a lot of changes in my life when I quit. I had to actively embrace sobriety. Maybe start by increasing your participation here, on SR. Forge some contacts. Join the August class for added support. You said you have seen improvement. What were you doing that led to those successes?

Be well. You can do this.

PurpleKnight

Sounds like you've hit the nail on the head, for me abstinence only got me soo far, a real change in my lifestyle and routines that's what made the difference.

Though I would throw into the equation of utilising your support BEFORE going for that drink, post a thread, get some feedback, a second opinion on things, I can guarantee that there will be plenty around these parts that will blow away the fairytale of that drink being a good idea when it's the worst.

Go at things again, you can do this!!

On The Road

Hi JJ. You can do this. You just have to make a commitment to yourself that you are going to change.

Please do whatever you have to to go to bed sober tonight. Repeat each day.

Rio97

Hey JJ, you're yesterday sounded like my yesterday. Glad you've made the decision to stop.

Retread1959

I hope you're feeling better today, JJ9!

Anna

Welcome, JJ.

I hope you feel better now and that you have a plan for staying sober.

LilyMarie

I hope you woke up this morning feeling infinitely better, JJ9!
It's a tough cycle to break. And it's annoying as hell to keep trying again and again and again. Good luck. You will get this.

JJ9

Thank you all so much! I appreciate every response greatly!



I feel so much better this morning, and I know this is how I want to feel every day!!