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Old 04-23-2015, 05:03 PM
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Struggling

I have never been on a forum before, but I have nobody to talk to about
what I am going through. I have been sneaking alcohol again, and the other night I came home drunk, and made a fool of myself. Not to mention was really horrible to my boyfriend. He has never struggled with addiction, and he doesn't understand it. I used to be a drug addict, but after many years was able to quit, but alcohol always seems to defeat me. The past few days my anxiety has been through the roof and after looking up options I have decided to ask about the shot that makes you sick if you drink. I can not go to rehab or anything, because I have a child to take care of, but I need help. Has anyone ever tried this medicine? Any advice is appreciated.
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Old 04-23-2015, 05:10 PM
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Welcome amanda! You will find a ton of support and info here.

Sounds like you are referring to antabuse, a pill that causes sickness if one drinks alcohol after taking it. I have not used it, but I am sure there are others here who have experience with it.

If rehab is not an option, have you looked into outpatient detox followed by outpatient therapy programs?
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Old 04-23-2015, 05:33 PM
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Welcome Amanda--I'm glad you found us. You will find a lot of support here. I don't know anything about the shot but wish you luck in your efforts to get sober.
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Old 04-23-2015, 05:45 PM
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Welcome to the family! I don't know if antabuse comes in the form of a shot. All I've ever heard of is pills you take.

You've come to a very supportive place. I hope we can help you get sober for good.
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Old 04-23-2015, 06:03 PM
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hi amandamarie
You;ll find a lot of support here. I hope you'll stick around

Why not go see your Dr and talk over your options?

D
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Old 04-23-2015, 06:14 PM
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Welcome and I hope you talk to your dr about your concerns.
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Old 04-23-2015, 06:21 PM
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Thanks everybody for the support. I have an appointment on May 6th with a doctor, but that feels so far away right now. I have been so anxious today that my chest hurts, and I feel like I am gonna have a nervous breakdown. I have tried to quit so many times I fear this is my last chance. Not just with quitting but with keeping my family. In one night I managed to let everyone down again, and this time I am not sure if they will forgive especially my boyfriend. I feel like I am losing everything.
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Old 04-23-2015, 06:31 PM
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Great to meet you amanda - I'm so sorry for what you're going through. Believe me, you are in good company & we all understand.

I felt the same way when I finally came to SR & sought help to quit. I had spent years trying to control the amounts, and that never worked. It was hard to admit that every time I drank bad & unpredictable things happened. I was heading towards danger and self-destruction. Stopping all together was the only way to stay safe, & it was so wonderful to get free of it. You can do this.
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Old 04-23-2015, 06:33 PM
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why not join our Class of April support thread amanda?
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rt-2-a-19.html

Post in there as much as you want, but especially if you're feeling vulnerable

Anxiety is normal for all of us. Try not to freak yourself out too much. It will get better.

D
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Old 04-23-2015, 06:37 PM
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After Sunday night I have accepted I can not just drink a little. Like you said bad things always happen. I grew up with an alcoholic father, and I want more for my child. I hate myself when I drink. I thought I could quit on my own, because I have quit herion, coke, and weed, but alcohol seems to have a greater hold on me I guess. I worry I will end up how I was years ago homeless and alone.
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Old 04-23-2015, 06:39 PM
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Hi...I was much like you...only I did lose everything. Write down everything you feel right now. Everything. Then look back on it when you want to drink. I leaned heavily on this site and am doing outpatient treatment. You can do this.
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Old 04-23-2015, 06:39 PM
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I am looking at it now. Thank you very much.
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Old 04-23-2015, 08:34 PM
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I tried a medicine like Antabuse a couple of years ago. It helped for a while, but it is by no means an airtight measure. For me, it made me think twice when I had cravings, which is good, but after the first withdrawals you'll need a stronger plan for handling those cravings. When your motivation wears off after the first few weeks or months it's all too easy to quit medication, although I guess if you get shots, it might take longer for them to wear off.

A medicine like that makes drinking not an option, but you're gonna need a lot of other options to spend your time on, to build your life. There's much info here on making a sober plan. Try to take the time to make one while you await your doctors appointment. Write down what you'll do when you're bored, lonely, anxious or in crisis. Don't forget thinking of new ways to experience and celebrate happy moments.

https://store.samhsa.gov/shin/conten...0/SMA-3720.pdf

Welcome and please keep us posted on your journey!
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Old 04-24-2015, 12:01 PM
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Thank you for your input. I am currently looking for a job to fill my day while my daughter is in school, and looking into finding meetings locally but since I do not drive this may be hard to do. I was hoping the medicine helped the craving as well. It is disappointing to find that it doesn't. I also have a mental health appt. to deal with my anxiety, O.C.D, and P.T.S.D in hopes that solving some of thise issues will help me to feel like I do not need to drink.
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Old 04-24-2015, 12:12 PM
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Hi Amanda! I'm new too. First post. Vivitrol is the shot. It blocks the "high" Naltrexone is the pill that blocks the high. Disulfiram is the pill that makes you sick. I tried Naltrexone for a couple days. So easy to quit taking it. Also, for all of the above, you are supposed to be sober for a week before you start! That in itself is hard to do. If you get the shot I'd get some counseling. I'd like to try the shot but am afraid I'd go crazy with the AV (alcoholic voice in your head) and not being able to drink. Drinking on Antabuse I hear can kill you. Welcome to you and welcome to me! Keep posting. It's like going to an AA meeting from home. I hate to talk in meetings so I love this site.
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Old 04-24-2015, 12:42 PM
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Welcome to the Forum Amanda!!
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Old 04-24-2015, 12:44 PM
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Disfilfrum is Antabuse. I should also say that I have no medical background. It's just stuff I've looked into also. Also something else caught my attention. I'm on personal data so not reading back a lot. It seems you said you itch like crazy. I recently read about the liver. Not to scare you but maybe it might wake you up...,and me. I'm afraid my organs are in trouble. Itching is a sign of liver problems. Red blotchy palms are also. I've had the palms.
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Old 04-24-2015, 12:59 PM
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Welcome AmandaMarie
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Old 04-24-2015, 05:40 PM
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Sounds as though you are on the right track Amanda, you have a plan and understand that stopping means addressing the reasons, not the substance.There's a difference between not being able to drink and craving a drink
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Old 04-24-2015, 05:53 PM
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I am not sure if this is helpful but there is antiBuse and there is naltrexone. the later is supposed to take away the positive outcome we want from drinking. Google the Sinclair method ? I hope you find something g that works for yiu. Congrats on reaching out for help that is a big deal and you deserve all the success In the world!
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