Does Anyone Ever Recall And Cringe?

Old 04-21-2015, 02:19 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
MatildaRose's Avatar
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Yep....NEVER take a drink again!
Originally Posted by Opivotal View Post
I had the exact same thoughts on day 3, GirlGoneBad.

I think we all have. All I could do was stay sober and rebuild my life.

Make my apologies and NEVER take another drink. Live a life I wasn't ashamed of. This happened with time and sobriety.
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Old 04-21-2015, 03:58 PM
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Originally Posted by MIRecovery View Post
What I tell myself is, I'm not that person anymore and I never will be again as long as I stay sober
I could not agree more. I am a new version of myself but sober, happier, more confident, the list could go on...
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Old 04-21-2015, 04:04 PM
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Sure. I think we all do this.

Time is a healer though And knowing I never have to repeat those kinds of things!

Shame and guilt lessen over time. I focus on what I need to do today. And after a while, those awful memories do fade.

Hang in there
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Old 04-21-2015, 04:08 PM
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I did that GGB - but I had to stop torturing myself. It was leading me back to drinking to stop the memories. Those drunk, stupid people that we become when we drink are not the real us. It literally turned me into the opposite of what I really am. As MIRecovery said - that will never be us again, as long as we're sober. It's the only way to stay safe. Don't worry, the bad memories will fade with time. You have more important things to think about now.
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Old 04-21-2015, 04:27 PM
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I suffered from that for both drunk and sober moments. Sometimes, when I am walking down the street, I would have an embarrassing flashback and cringe (to the bemusement of other folks). I rarely have that nowadays. As the other wise posters above have said, it is the past when I was under the grip of alcohol. By that I mean the obvious shameful acts whilst drinking but also the low self-esteem and paranoia that alcoholism induced. That is no longer the case (fingers triple crossed).

As long as I stay sober, have positive intentions and actions I wont suffer from that anymore. By committing to this, I can let the past go and be free of those negative emotions.
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Old 04-21-2015, 05:39 PM
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Oh god yes. It's awful. But, I can say that the first weekend I was sober and I woke up on Monday having not regretted anything was the most amazing feeling. Every time a regretful thought pops into my mind, I remember that feeling and I feel so much better. Now my anxiety comes from "what if I drink and do something I regret again?" That pressure is currently overwhelming.
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Old 04-21-2015, 06:25 PM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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It is the times I straight up embarrassed myself that hurt the most. Loved ones have forgiven me. In my journey over the past few weeks trying to quit binge drinking I have found that forgiveness for others I feel wronged me has helped me a lot. Let go of hatred and regret. It is in the past. Find one person a day to be kind to for no reason. You got this!

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Old 04-21-2015, 11:03 PM
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Great question. When I was newly sober I was awash in shame and regrets. Ten months in I don't really think about my past blackout episodes.

Actually, people are pretty quick to forgive if you are sober for a good length of time. Memories are pretty short as long as long as they NEVER see you drink again. Most people know who we are deep down and like us when we are sober. It might sound like Pollyanna, but believe me, I have done the most vile and destructive things in blackouts.

If I were to drink again, ever, all those memories would be fresh with me and everyone else. (insert toilet flushing sound effect).
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Old 04-22-2015, 12:13 AM
  # 29 (permalink)  
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I really like this thread. I'm on day three and it's great to know we all share similar experiences :-)
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Old 04-22-2015, 03:58 AM
  # 30 (permalink)  
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I love the saying, "there are two days you cannot change, "yesterday and tomorrow."

I live with the consequences of those actions so I don't feel as guilty about them today.

12 step work helped some of it-others, it took time.
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