trachemys

geno, I sense that you are trying to fail. You want to pitch a drunk and blame it on whatever that was you said up there.

STOP NOW.

Just stop.

geno198

I will. And I didnt, blame on my wife, my decision, my fall,my responsibility. No one else's.

Nuudawn

So you discovered an obstacle to sobriety... your wife's drinking. Sounds like you have already come up with some ways to walk on through. Sometimes the path to sobriety is full of stumbles that we need to look at as learning experiences. When we face the situation again..what will we do differently? That's it..that's all.

Serenidad

I know how you feel Geno. I was in your shoes exactly 3 weeks ago and it sucked! A short 21 days later I can honestly say that things are MUCH better!

1. Anxiety is 80% better
2. Depression is 90% better
3. Shame & guilt is 95% better
4. Hopelessness & despair is 100% better
5. Physical withdrawal symptoms are 95% better
6. Cravings are 75% better (just mostly thoughts now)
7. Self-hatred is gone

All these improvements are in just 21 short days. It was very hard the first week but each day it gets easier and now that I'm starting to feel better I do NOT want to start over and go back thru that bell.

Things I do:
1. At least 5 AA meetings per week (sponsor, 12-steps, call & text new sober friends)
2. Pray daily to my higher power...God
3. LOTS of self-care. I make sure I'm not hungry, angry, lonely, tired or stressed
4. Exercise daily. (I've just walking my dog...helps a lot!)
5. I don't drink no matter what! There is NO good reason or excuse.
6. SR
7. I try not to take myself too seriously and be kind to myself...because we are not bad people, we are sick people with a chronic, progressive disease. The great news....It can be arrested if we just don't drink one day at a time.

I hope my post gives you some HOPE! You can do this!!!

Serenidad

P.S. my husband drinks too. Alcohol is everywhere. I can't move to a deserted island so I am learning to deal with it. Alcohol is poison to me.

U can do it!

ScottFromWI

So make a pact with yourself to do whatever it takes to make sure it never happens again. Go to meetings. Spend lots of time here. Read up on AVRT. Visit a counselor. See your doctor. Read up on other methods I forgot to mention.

No one is destined to keep drinking, although it might seem that way at times. The bottom line though is that Sobriety 100% possible if you want it to be.

Serenidad

P.S.S. my husband doesn't drink in our home. That would be way too hard for me! I asked him not to so he doesn't. He's a "normal" drinker. Will your wife support that?

geno198

Maybe we have talked about it.

Serenidad

Do u think she would support that?

brynn

Geno....I want to clarify that I know moving out isn't feasible for everyone. My partner is an alcoholic and was not willing to keep a dry house and has shown no interest in stopping his drinking...in fact he was actually sabotaging my sobriety and I had no choice but to get out.
Please be honest with your wife and tell her you need her support in this. I think it would be very very difficult to maintain sobriety while watching your drinking partner indulge every night. Give her a chance to help you with this.

Mountainmanbob

Yes, I remember those days
after dancing yet once again
with the liquid devil
don't give up
keep trying to stay sober
MM