aborkie

I understand the difficulty in trying to quit drinking, as I failed countless times over many years. However, as I near 60 days and reflect on this problem I had in my life, all I had to do was stop something. In other words, it took no action on my part. So when we think of all the problems that occur in our lives, most require serious action, but this does not. Then why is it so hard?

Windancer

Hi aborkie. Im not sure I understand the post...? Are you saying that once a decision is made, something is not that hard ie. drinking?
I don't agree with "it took no action on my part" as making a decision and sticking to it IS an action....

Windancer

Also, alcohol is addictive, physically AND emotionally. So that makes it extremely difficult for many people, despite the true and intense desire to quit.

biminiblue

I think what was meant is that it takes action TO drink.

Like you have to pick up a bottle, can, or glass and physically pour it into your body.

Inaction, in this case, is what is needed.

tomsteve

getting sober for me required serious action. I had a lot o fthings I needed to change and it all required action on some level.
getting sober was the hardest thing I have ever done.

Windancer

I see what you mean. For me, it was much much harder to NOT take that action then to take it.

Eddiebuckle

I think the logic here is flawed. For me, drinking was how I coped with the imperfections in myself and the world around me. The action required of me to successfully quit was to find an alternative to the oblivion that alcohol offered. To someone who is not an alcoholic, that wouldn't sound like much, but for me, it was the hardest thing I have ever done.

biminiblue

Well, yes.

I remember a past boyfriend telling me he had slept with his ex-wife while he was living with me. He said, "It just happened."

You can imagine my take on that turn of phrase.

GracieLou

Because we have a tendency to think. It is human.

We think ourselves right back to drinking. We play games in our own heads. I won't, I will, I won't, I will, I won't, I will.

It would be nice to just crawl in our brains and hit the off switch, but we can't. We justify, we rationalize, we lie to ourselves, we convince ourselves we really don't have a problem, or we have one but it not that bad or it is that bad but we are not hurting others. Round and round it goes.

The process of rationalizing and justifying has to stop. The obsession has to be overcome and the only way I was able to do that was to work the steps of AA. There are other recovery programs as well.

Just stopping indicates that we can use will power. I had no such will power over alcohol. I never did because I am an alcoholic. I have no off switch. It is broken or I never had one.

I used alcohol to escape, without it there is no escape but I have learned I don't need an escape. I can live life without one.

Acceptance that life is what it is. Live it on life's terms, not mine. My terms mean I run away and hide from it. My terms means I am right and you are wrong. My terms means that people should change so I don't have to feel angry or frustrated with them.

That is not life. I have to change and bend, not the world around me.

aborkie

Maybe I didn't phrase it right. I shattered my ankle once which was HUGE problem in my life. I also lost a job. These were big problems in my life that required action; rehab on my ankle, many job interviews and job searches et.,

Alcohol was a big problem in my life also, but all I had to do was stop something (drinking) and it was fixed.

Windancer

Hey, so you were referring to my post about inaction?
Sorry to hear about the boyfriend. That must have really hurt.

ImperfectlyMe

Not drinking was the hardest concept to follow through on, despite its apparent simplicity.

LBrain

I think the OP was using a tongue-in-cheek metaphor.

Windancer

Oh...got ya now Biminiblue!

soberjuly

Well actually I think it does require serious action because alcohol is very damaging to the body. Why is it hard? because I believe the brain gets seriously addicted to it. Stopping an addiction is hard. After awhile the drinking becomes less enjoyable and more of a need.

PurpleKnight

Habits can become the way of life, for me the habit of drinking was just so difficult to short circuit, I'd stop by the liquor store after work, drink every evening, drink at sports events, concerts, birthdays, weddings, funerals, New Years.

Habit and routine was the enemy when I tried to quit, and then when we try to eliminate drinking, we find we're then bored as we then have so much time on our hands, and are uncomfortable in our own company!!

aborkie

Is drinking a need or a choice?

GracieLou

Both.

Before I was sober, it was a need.

In the beginning I needed it to cope with life. I needed it to take me away from my problems.

Once I took a drink I could not stop so again, I needed it to continue the release. I was not capable of stopping, the craving felt just like a need. I had to have it. I did not know how to live without it.

Now I practice the AA program, completed the steps, had a spiritual awakening and learned to deal with life on life’s terms and I have no desire to drink. I live a happy and sober life.

If I drank now, it would be a choice.

sugarbear1

drinking = relief. badly needed relief.

it wasn't about action or inaction. it was necessary.

aborkie

Solving my problem was easier than I thought, which leads me to believe that I never needed alcohol, I just chose it. Quitting nicotine has been a much harder. I feel like my body needs nicotine, but my body does not want any part of alcohol. I just forced it down my throat for years.