too scared to face people
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Middelton, Idaho
Posts: 64
too scared to face people
It's been three days since my "blow out" binge drinking, attempted suicide. I'm am hearing bits and pieces of my behavior from Sunday night and all I want to do is hide under the covers and stay there. So ashamed and embarrassed, not to mention sore ( busted up my ankle during the binge). The roughest part of all of this, is that I pulled all this crap in the place I work. (I'm a bartender). So, not only do I have to face the people I love, I have to go to work and face all my customers. I can't begin to tell you how much this sucks
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: New Hampshire
Posts: 377
I made a total fool of myself during my 1 night relapse a few weeks ago also. I ended up crawling home in the street from my neighbors house, fell on my front step and was full of bruises and scratches. My shoulder STILL hurts. I took pictures of these injuries to remind me of what drinking does to me.
My sponsor told me to put down the 2x4 I was beating myself with and start fresh. You can do the same!!!
My sponsor told me to put down the 2x4 I was beating myself with and start fresh. You can do the same!!!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Ma
Posts: 3,553
People do and say stupid things while they're drunk.
It always seems worse before you face the folks that were present.
You're just having anxiety cause you can't remember everything.
It will pass the longer you stay away from drinking.
The worst thing I ever did was start drinking to forget what I did while drinking.
Vicious,and I mean vicious cycle.
It always seems worse before you face the folks that were present.
You're just having anxiety cause you can't remember everything.
It will pass the longer you stay away from drinking.
The worst thing I ever did was start drinking to forget what I did while drinking.
Vicious,and I mean vicious cycle.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: UK (England)
Posts: 2,782
Similar things happened to me so many times when i was drinking. All you can do is face it and keep moving forward. People make mistakes. Hopefully you wont have to face anything like this again. Best wishes.
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: North East, US
Posts: 2,310
Cc sorry for your situation. I think the best approach is to let go of the embarrassment! Take the "**** happens" approach if people try and bust on you. Honesty always works to. Hard to berate someone when they say, " hey back off I have a problem and I'm addressing it, not your concern.... It's mine!"
I hope you really are ok! And that you stick with your sobriety! Welcome and congrats on 3 days.
I hope you really are ok! And that you stick with your sobriety! Welcome and congrats on 3 days.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Middelton, Idaho
Posts: 64
I am so grateful I found this forum. Thank you all. I am headed across the street to my best friend who was the recipient of my suicide texts (that I don't remember)....I asked him for a few minutes. Will let you know how it went...I'm already crying and I haven't even got up off my *** yet.....ugh.....here I go!
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: North East, US
Posts: 2,310
Good luck if this is your best friend then it's ok to open up be vulnerable and say I need help and support. We're all here for you!
Give yourself this gift of forgiveness learn and move onward and upward!
if this is your best friend then it's ok to open up be vulnerable and say I need help and support. We're all here for you! Give yourself this gift of forgiveness learn and move onward and upward!
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,599
And, remember you never have to go through this again. You can begin today showing your friends, family and co-workers that you are changing. Try to focus on what you can do to change this situation, rather than the guilt and shame.
Let us know how the meeting with your friend turned out.
Let us know how the meeting with your friend turned out.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,253
To begin building a strong solid foundation
in recovery we have to begin learning about
our addictions and it's affects on our own
bodies and those around us.
Then there are tools to use and incoperate
in our everyday lives to help us stay sober
or clean each day.
Learning to stay and remain sober or clean
requires making changes in our lives. Change
isn't always easy but is very necessary if we
want to achieve long term sobriety.
Change may have to come with changing
people, places and things that we would
normally drink or drug over. Even if it's
bartending. That career or job has so much
temptation with all the liquor or in other
words, poison to kill anyone addicted to
it.
Change or move away from the source that
would keep us into our addiction would be
a good way to begin building our solid foundation
in recovery to live upon for yrs. to come.
in recovery we have to begin learning about
our addictions and it's affects on our own
bodies and those around us.
Then there are tools to use and incoperate
in our everyday lives to help us stay sober
or clean each day.
Learning to stay and remain sober or clean
requires making changes in our lives. Change
isn't always easy but is very necessary if we
want to achieve long term sobriety.
Change may have to come with changing
people, places and things that we would
normally drink or drug over. Even if it's
bartending. That career or job has so much
temptation with all the liquor or in other
words, poison to kill anyone addicted to
it.
Change or move away from the source that
would keep us into our addiction would be
a good way to begin building our solid foundation
in recovery to live upon for yrs. to come.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Middelton, Idaho
Posts: 64
Made my amends with my best friend. He's the best. I love him so much and he was so receptive and forgiving, as I knew he would be. Now, onto the rest of the people who were involved.....ugh
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Chicago
Posts: 101
Hi cc, thanks for sharing, I too made a complete fool out of myself and was VERY inappropriate around a coworker. As painful as it was to go back to work I've tried to use it as a constant reminder that I can never drink again. I still have so much embarrassment and shame but I promise you it will get easier with time. Sharing here with us also helps remind us all why we decided to stop drinking, so your terrible night can be turned into a positive as long as you try to stop too.
Good luck making amends, and remember to make amends with yourself too. We've all been there & beating yourself up doesn't do any good. It will get better.
Good luck making amends, and remember to make amends with yourself too. We've all been there & beating yourself up doesn't do any good. It will get better.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Chattanooga TN
Posts: 596
Count me on the list of folks who had to wake up and face the drunk music from the previous night... Jeebus, what heavy drinking will do to your mind ugh.
Just hang tough and get thru it. I know how embarrassing and stressful it is to face this stuff but it will pass, and you can begin living without waking up to this sort of stuff ever again, if you want.
Just to share, mine was the worst facebook post in history about someone at work. Everyone at work is on my friends list of course lol. It has been weeks and I am still reeling from that one, but all I can do is not to ever let it happen again.
Just hang tough and get thru it. I know how embarrassing and stressful it is to face this stuff but it will pass, and you can begin living without waking up to this sort of stuff ever again, if you want.
Just to share, mine was the worst facebook post in history about someone at work. Everyone at work is on my friends list of course lol. It has been weeks and I am still reeling from that one, but all I can do is not to ever let it happen again.
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