james872

There are so many factors in this situation. You need to find the right course of action.

What I'm personally most concerned about is, if you go with your dad, how will you do regarding drinking? Is it safe?

Also, will you still be motivated to go to rehab after having given your dad the support he needs from you in this situation?

My response to your other thread about this was to immediately think "Rehab before all else". But if you're actually in the situation, it can be a little more complex.

What I'm expecting is that you would go through this situation and end up having an even deeper connection with your dad. And given the circumstances, you'd probably have even more appreciation for life, connections, loved ones and the true importance of those things.

If that were the case, it would help you greatly with rehab and getting sober. You have a much stronger worthwhile goal to move towards.

So as long as the drinking doesn't become a problem and you still go to rehab afterward, from where I'm sitting, going with your dad to support him would be the best course of actions.

But you know all the factors that are involved in this situation, so eventually you are the only person who can really make the decision. On here, we can only give advice based on our perception and knowledge of the situation.

I know you can do this.

Love and strength,

J.

Raider

Ladyblue thank you. And thank you all. I will call Dad after he gets home from church. I know he would want rehab for me. I just want to be there for him. And alcohol has taken that away for me. That brings tears to my eyes. What a bunch of crap this is.

Raider

Love James!

ScottFromWI

Just be 100 percent honest with him. Now is not the time to be hiding things to save face. And then be honest with yourself in making the decision..remembering what may transpire regarding your drinking while you are there.

Raider

I know ready, I'm scared

deeker

There u go, u just answered my question. We have to be healthy for ourselves first before we can be of any help to others. Make the calls asap and don't forget you wanted this tomorrow when you wake up and this addction is telling you that u r ok and don't need help Raider. It's a lie.

Raider 30 days in a rehab will go so fast and your dad will be fine. Please try to get a foundation in recovery. It's not your Dad who is dying, it is you if u keep on drinking. God Bless! This is not a game.

People die from this illness. Don't be another statistic. Do what you need to do. Just walk thru ur fear and do it. Ur Dad will be very sad if he lost his daughter.

jdooner

Stay strong, good luck - your life is about to get a lot better in a few short weeks! My bet is you will feel a massive relief being honest with your dad too...like the weight of the World has been lifted. Use this strength to continue into rehab. Harness the momentum Raider - this is it your big moment

Mizzuno

Raider- I think that this predicament is very hard. There are many things to factor in here and I know how you must feel pulled into two directions.
I am not sure what road you should take. I know that I would not want to regret not being there and then that regret can cause future issues. I also would not want to be active in my Alcoholism while trying to help out an Aunt and my father. So, it is a predicament for sure. Are you able to check into an outpatient facility while helping your father with your Aunt?
This suggestion may get a negative response, but I was considering all involved. Forgive me if I do not understand the whole situation.

Raider

You are all right. This alcohol is tricky. It makes me think things that aren't true. I can't get a grip. You guys are right.

jdooner

Mizzuno - try reading the thread to understand the situation. No offense but I think your comments are may cause more confusion even if with the best intentions. I would recommend reading Raider's past posts too.

Raider

Mizz no negative response here. I just need the rehab. I know this. I just know this. Ok why am I crying.

soberhawk

I think it is a good solution Raider, to call your father and have a honest talk about this. Honesty is fine gift to give to your loved ones.

I am sure your father will enjoy seeing you to get through rehab and become stronger and sober, in one sense you will be there for him – by doing that.

jaynie04

I didn't tell a lot of people where I went. I said I went to the Mayo Clinic in Arizona for chronic pain. I shared with my mother in law who lives in CA. She flew out to AZ for family week and took care of my daughter so my husband could spend days at the treatment center during family week. Her husband (my step father in law) passed away earlier this year. Including her in my recovery helped both of us. I know feeling included in something so private made her feel engaged, needed and helpful. She was all of those things.

When I asked for help and got honest about my struggle, I not only received a gift I gave a gift.

jaynie04

Because change is scary. But change means that you are taking action. It's like you have been filling an empty gas tank in your car, now it is full and you have the map in front of you. Turning the key in the ignition and pulling out of that station means that you are leaving the wreckage behind. My guess is that you will look back on the next couple of days as one of the most pivotal in your life, pretty awesome.

Raider

Thank you all so much. I feel more clear on my path. I know my Dad wants me sober more than anything else in this world. I know that. Just one of the reasons he is my rock.

phoebe64

I am late to this, Raider, but hope you get to rehab sooner rather than later.

Is/are there other family members who can step in to support your dad?

Raider

Rochele probably not. But I'll call him this afternoon and see what's up. But you're right I need rehab soon

Clemence

So many helpful posts here Raider. Good luck with your decision. There are a LOT of us rooting for you here x

Raider

Thank you. There are a bunch of awesome people here, that's for sure !!!

Raider

I just called my Dad and asked him if he was going to Ohio to see my aunt before she passed. He said he didn't know. I told him I would now follow through with my rehab plan. Of course, my Dad said go to REHAB! "Pam you need to go to rehab, I can make it back there alone." Wow, I am blessed with awesome parents. I swear, if they could, they would go to rehab for me. They have been so kind. Love you Mom and Dad!

Pam