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Old 05-20-2013, 04:40 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Finally At Peace


Today is my 5th week of sobriety and it is hard to describe the feelings. For one it seems a lot longer than that and I just feel so peaceful. My family is proud of me, but most of all I am proud of myself. Thank you everyone on SR for the support. This is my daily must read page.

When I read each post I feel a personal connection. To the newbies like myself who are going through withdrawal and conflict and to those with long-term sobriety who I wish to emulate. Each one of you have a played a positive part in a persons life and choices.

Something I have never revealed. My Father-in-law was a member of AA with over 40 yrs. He lived with my husband and I. He went to meetings daily and saved many lives. On Thanksgiving Day, 2011 he was killed in a car accident at age 80. His funeral was so full of members from AA who talked about his contribution and help with their sobriety. He was truly loved by all.

The sad thing is, he died with the guilt of knowing he could not help me. Yes, he tried hard over the years by taking me to meetings, bringing me reading material and talking about the steps. I was in the midst of an alcoholic haze and could not see the way out. I even left my family that Thanksgiving to go with a friend out of town so I could drink and not be hassled. I was not even home when the police came to the door to notify us that he was life flighted to the hospital.

In addition to that, my only brother and only living relative, committed suicide in January, 2011 - 10 months before Grandpoo died. He was an alcoholic. Shot himself in the head because his wife wanted a divorce. Was found in a hotel room with a half empty gallon of Whiskey beside the bed.

Well I will end this story by saying - my sobriety today is dedicated to Grandpoo and Mike. I will continue to battle this disease and win for myself. But today I am thankful and wish that the two people I loved so much could see me now.


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Old 05-20-2013, 05:43 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Bestwishes on your 5th week L or D

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The cards of life won't break my hand, so let's pull on the freedom bell and ring.
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Old 05-20-2013, 05:52 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Good luck & stay strong
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Old 05-20-2013, 05:59 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Thank you for the words of encouragement. Tomorrow is a big day - I go to the Doctor for a re-check on my liver and bloodwork. Hopefully all will come back normal. Thanks again.
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Old 05-20-2013, 06:08 AM   #5 (permalink)
now's the time
 
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I'm so sorry for your losses. You are doing your father-in-law and brother proud.
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Old 05-20-2013, 07:13 AM   #6 (permalink)
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What a sad thing to read. But so happy to read of your sobriety, you have every right to be proud of yourself!!
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Old 05-20-2013, 07:21 AM   #7 (permalink)
Learning to live again
 
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LiveorDie - I believe that they both know and are overjoyed that you've made this huge change in your life.

I did the same sort of shameful things you did - but we have to forgive ourselves. I'm sure you never intended to cause pain or hurt. Alcohol turned me into an uncaring, selfish person - but that's not the real me. Thankfully we never have to return to that awful, dark time in our lives.

Wonderful job on attaining 5 weeks. It'll keep getting even better. Proud of you!
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Old 05-20-2013, 07:27 AM   #8 (permalink)
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When sober each day we celebrate the gift of life
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Old 05-20-2013, 10:57 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Commitment to AA, like your FIL, will save your life (ODAAT) for decades as it has done mine.

All the best.

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Old 05-20-2013, 11:09 AM   #10 (permalink)
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This is inspiring and well put! That "peaceful" feeling is what will keep motivated this time!
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