totalchange

I understand how hard it is. You are going about it in a healthy way for yourself by reaching out, that in itself is a big step!!!

totalchange

The people here are great. i will keep you in my prayers

Dee74

hey lastchance

I'm sorry for your pain but I'm really glad you're reaching out to us.

I lost not one but two fiancees, at least partially to my love of the drink.

How I coped was to get drunk and out of control for a year or so each time; pestered the life out of the people I loved; made a real nuisance of myself; and was incredibly lucky not to be served with court orders....

I was not a well boy then and I generally made things much much worse for me and for them.

What I should have done was focus on me.

There was a problem in me that needed fixing - it was more than just alcoholism - alcoholism was just the visible tip of the iceberg.

I needed to be sober to start that work tho - and so do you.

I know it hurts, I know it consumes your thoughts, and I know it sucks....but you can't change yesterday.

It just is.

The good news is that tomorrow can be something quite spectacular...if you're willing to have the faith that working on yourself and staying sober will pay off.

When I arrived at SR, guys here said trust me - this is the right road...I was sure I believed it, but I went along, I had faith...and they were right

I also know it's hard to have any esteem or regard for yourself right now.

Thats natural too - but ignore that best you can - it's another part/effect of the addiction.

You'll find that perspective will shift in time

lean on the folks here, and whatever other support you have next week. It may be rough in parts, but you'll make it - I have confidence in you,,,if I did it, you can

D

vatutin11

Hi Last Chance.

Well done on staying sober. It has been an immensely tough period for you and you've stayed sober throughout.

A few years ago I cheated on my ex, due to binge drinking which I use to cover my anxiety. We had been together 3 years at the time. I went into AA back then, mainly to show her I was trying to fix it. Lasted 9 months sober. A year after this I was back drinking again and not developing as a person and my gf broke up with me (not just because of the drinking, mainly the personal problems that drinking helped me to deal with when I'd go out).

No-one can say what will happen here. However, after 3 months of working on myself, I managed to win my girlfriend back. I needed to go through that 3 months to discover a lot about myself. I became a lot stronger as a result. This is a great opportunity, and you are going the right way about it by staying sober and working on yourself. You need this time to learn. Falling back into old habits like clinginess will keep the old you hanging around, the one who needs to drink.