Day number two
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 263
Originally Posted by Hopefulme 
Thanks for the encouragement! This Wednesday will be one week! You??
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Vancouver BC
Posts: 144
Originally Posted by Hopefulme
Thanks, FeelingGreat. Everything went well. It was tempting when he asked me if i wanted wine, but when I reluctantly said no, he decided not to have his beer :-)
I am proud of your husband too for not having the beer. Hopefully he'll understand that in your current, fragile state that just by the simple action of him not drinking around you will greatly help you.
Congrats on the great work!!!
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Brit in Canada
Posts: 173
Originally Posted by Hopefulme
His case of beer is almost gone, so I hope he doesn't buy anymore.
Oh and if you OH offers you wine again, I'd ask him not to offer again (ever)... Just my opinion.
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 366
Hopeful,
I can really relate to your story. I'm on day 8 now. Since I joined SR (in Dec) and started to curtail my drinking, I've been able to string together a sober week or two at a time without too much effort. But now I'm committed to stringing together a lifetime of sober days.
I'm going out of town with Hubby this week and it's gonna be tricky to not drink while at the hotel and going out to dinners. I'm so impressed that you did so well when faced with the same thing. Your are going to be my inspiration.
I know what you mean about the doing housework. I got in the habit of drinking a glass or two of wine when I would do the housework. It got to the point, where I felt I couldn't do the housework without drinking. When those thoughts cross my mind now, I just excuse myself from doing ANYTHING - and come here, or read about recovery, etc . . . I'd rather be sober with a dirty house then drunk with a clean house.
I hope your hubby stops drinking at home. That would be too hard for me, I think. If you find yourself overcome with the need to pour his beer down your throat - pour it down the drain instead. I'm sure your hubby will understand.
I can really relate to your story. I'm on day 8 now. Since I joined SR (in Dec) and started to curtail my drinking, I've been able to string together a sober week or two at a time without too much effort. But now I'm committed to stringing together a lifetime of sober days.
I'm going out of town with Hubby this week and it's gonna be tricky to not drink while at the hotel and going out to dinners. I'm so impressed that you did so well when faced with the same thing. Your are going to be my inspiration.
I know what you mean about the doing housework. I got in the habit of drinking a glass or two of wine when I would do the housework. It got to the point, where I felt I couldn't do the housework without drinking. When those thoughts cross my mind now, I just excuse myself from doing ANYTHING - and come here, or read about recovery, etc . . . I'd rather be sober with a dirty house then drunk with a clean house.
I hope your hubby stops drinking at home. That would be too hard for me, I think. If you find yourself overcome with the need to pour his beer down your throat - pour it down the drain instead. I'm sure your hubby will understand.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 90
RaggedyMan, day number 6 and still dry :-) Looks like he hasn't bought any beer so far and he drank whatever was left lastnight while I was visiting my dad at Hospice. I think he got the message, but yes if he offers me wine again, I'm gona remind him of all the great (not!) times we shared with our fifth wheel, Merlot.
You keep up the good work too :-)
You keep up the good work too :-)
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 90
Milly4me-congrats on making it over the one-week hump! I know you will make it a lifetime. It will be a challenge this weekend, but you can do it! Just think about the morning after. Not having cottonmouth is a wonderful feeling ;-> I wish we can just enjoy a glass of wine with dinner or whatever, because that's romantic, but it does not stop there for me. A glass turns into an entire bottle. For our one-year anniversary, we got a hotel in the city, had plans to go dance the night away. We started drinking in the hotel room, and even though I only had maybe 2 glasses, had a pretty good buzz going. Next thing you know, we were arguing, and to make a long story short, we didn't stay at the hotel that night.
I can write a series of books about my life and how alcohol almost destroyed my life.
I was lol-ing when you said you just excuse yourself when those thoughts cross your mind! Good plan :-) All those triggers... Atleast for now, we gota do what we gota do, right?
Anyway, keep it up Milly4me!
I can write a series of books about my life and how alcohol almost destroyed my life.
I was lol-ing when you said you just excuse yourself when those thoughts cross your mind! Good plan :-) All those triggers... Atleast for now, we gota do what we gota do, right?
Anyway, keep it up Milly4me!
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Brit in Canada
Posts: 173
Originally Posted by Hopefulme
RaggedyMan, day number 6 and still dry :-) Looks like he hasn't bought any beer so far and he drank whatever was left lastnight while I was visiting my dad at Hospice. I think he got the message, but yes if he offers me wine again, I'm gona remind him of all the great (not!) times we shared with our fifth wheel, Merlot.
You keep up the good work too :-)
You keep up the good work too :-)
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 339
Sobriety will help you handle situations that used to baffle us. Great work with one week. It can be a roller coaster in the beginning so hang in there. I am sure you know that drinking will only make the domestic issues worse.
I read a couple of your earlier posts. Gosh I remember so many evenings that my wife and I planned to have a nice "date night" only to end up getting drunk and into a fight. I do not miss that one bit.
I read a couple of your earlier posts. Gosh I remember so many evenings that my wife and I planned to have a nice "date night" only to end up getting drunk and into a fight. I do not miss that one bit.
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 90
I know, and should be able to have that reminder that alcohol only destroys front and center of my mind. More than any of the other triggers; i.e. boredom and loneliness, problems with the OH would send me on a bender. I'm so glad and thankful that you responded so quickly and reminded me that I need to keep a clear head. If I can get away, I'm going to have an intense workout on my Crosstrainer. Thanks again!
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 339
Who is this crosstrainer person 
I still have bad days and still have disagreements with my wife but I deal with it so much better. There are actual reasons not just drunken crap I made up. We go to bed with it settled if we disagree.
One other thing that helped me in early sobriety was to have a gratitude list. All the things I am thankful for that I still have and will get to keep by staying sober. I looked at it several times. I still have those things and more.
I still have bad days and still have disagreements with my wife but I deal with it so much better. There are actual reasons not just drunken crap I made up. We go to bed with it settled if we disagree.
One other thing that helped me in early sobriety was to have a gratitude list. All the things I am thankful for that I still have and will get to keep by staying sober. I looked at it several times. I still have those things and more.
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 90
Tough day today...dealing with so much right now. My dad's cancer, marital problems, finances. I came soooo close to picking up a bottle of wine, and I probably would have if my teenage son wasn't with me. I kept telling myself that if I take home the wine and take out that cork, it's all over for me. Tomorrow
I have plans to stay busy.Tonight so that I wouldn't get bored or stressed, I baked a pumpkin roll for everyone to have for breakfast. Gona TRY to wake up early and workout. I'm so glad I get to wake up to a hangover free morning!
I have plans to stay busy.Tonight so that I wouldn't get bored or stressed, I baked a pumpkin roll for everyone to have for breakfast. Gona TRY to wake up early and workout. I'm so glad I get to wake up to a hangover free morning!
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: The South Pacific
Posts: 306
The mornings have been so huge for me...
I know that having a beer would prolly feel really nice about now, but it's the not stopping at a beer that is what gets me. I have a pretty astounding track record that proves I can't just have one. I think I may even be undefeated.
I just have to think of how miserable it makes me feel, and just last Saturday--I had to hit the john at a bar to throw up--and then sat down like nothing happened and finished my (full) pint. Thinking about that tonight, I really can't believe I did that. Well, I did...and I'd more than likely do it again if I let myself down that road again.
I am enjoying restful sleep, and nice mornings too much.
Good on ya for making the right call! I'll bet those pumpkin rolls are going to taste even sweeter!
I know that having a beer would prolly feel really nice about now, but it's the not stopping at a beer that is what gets me. I have a pretty astounding track record that proves I can't just have one. I think I may even be undefeated.
I just have to think of how miserable it makes me feel, and just last Saturday--I had to hit the john at a bar to throw up--and then sat down like nothing happened and finished my (full) pint. Thinking about that tonight, I really can't believe I did that. Well, I did...and I'd more than likely do it again if I let myself down that road again.
I am enjoying restful sleep, and nice mornings too much.
Good on ya for making the right call! I'll bet those pumpkin rolls are going to taste even sweeter!
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 90
Yes the rolls were yummy, and yet another good thing about not drinking is that I didn't eat the entire thing, lol! I hope that by being on SR, you don't have to beat yourself up about the past (throwing up in the restroom) because most of us have been there, done that. What matters is we have to remember those bad experiences so that we can learn from them, and never repeat it for the rest of our lives. When I tried to quit in the past without a support system, I felt like the only person who struggled with this problem. That guilt and shame is one of the many reasons (not excuses) that I couldn't stop the insanity.
Hang in there and let's welcome another happy morning :-D
Hang in there and let's welcome another happy morning :-D
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