Allyson S.

Hi All-

I am new to this site and not sure how to get started. I am trying to get of pot and painkillers. My head hurts so bad right now and I am all foggy. I have been smoking pot for almost 25 years and I am now finally sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. I have never thought of pot as a real drug. My parents always smoked and its always been in my house...it's like water. But now I can't stop and I feel like crap! Any help or words of wisdom will be helpfull. I want to go to an NA meeting but I don't want to feel lijke an outsider because its just pot...

Thanks!

Dan

Some of the greatest longtimers and my best teachers in NA are potheads! Never touched anything else. There is a chair for everyone in the rooms. The newcomer is always the most important person at a meeting. They don't care what you used or how much. Just that you want to stop using.
www.na.org
Stick around. Gang's gonna want to say hi! Welcome Allyson!

Paulie

Allyson -

Welcome and ditto to Dan. Go to a meeting today if you can, you will not be alone, I promise.

It gets better.

Chy

Hi and welcome!

You'll find a great deal of support here! Glad you found us.

mnj1024

Hi allyson, welcome! my name is mike and I'm and addict. I think it's great that you are taking steps to learn about yourself. Only you can decide if you are an addict or not it sounds like you've begun doing that. I too felt like an outsider at first, but for me when I stopped comparing my problems or my drugs of choice with others and started relating to people's feelings about themselves and why they used the drugs they did, I started to feel a lot more comfortable. We all couldn't stop on our own and felt like crap. I came to realize that it doesn't matter what we were using but most importantly why we were using, and we all have a lot to share and learn from each other in that aspect. I know this is scarey facing our fears, but I think you'll find if you let go of your fears and give this NA thing a try you will be welcomed with open arms. You have deffinately come to the right place just wait and see. good luck to you and I hope you stick around. believe me it's worth it.

hugs, mike

True Blue

Hello Allyson & Welcome to SR, you will find a lot of support & healing here. I know I sure did. Just to let you know it can be done, and the fog goes away. 229 days clean after 30 years of pot, pills, anything I could get my hands on to block my feelings. Today I am a miracle, and so are you. Get to that meeting.

Allyson S.

thanks everyone for the responses...I am looking for a meeting but there is not much around. I took my last hit on Monday night. I can't stop shaking. I also stopped smoking butts then too. I feel like I could throw up and I ahve a headache from hell... I am at work and all I want to do is go home and sleep the rest of the weekend away even though it's only Wed. The thing that scares me about meetings is having to be responsible to someone else. I was in another 12 step group for awhile and had a sponsor. I stopped going after I had to call her everyday. I hated that. I know there is no quick fix but I want the pain to go away...If I can't find a meeting I will at least do some reading from the big Book and just take a few deep breaths and hope it will get easier. I wish somewone would put me in a straight jacket trow me in a padded room and stand over me until I am all better...

Dan

Here. I borrowed it from a friend! Don't give up. Your body needs time to ajust and detox.

Allyson S.

what is the image of???

Allyson S.

how long does the detox take?

Dan

Person in a straight jacket. Just humor Allyson. I read your last post. You can stay clean.

Paulie

WOW I would think there would be alot of meetings in a city like Boston, don't know exactly where you are located.

You might want to just try stopping one thing at a time, first post then the cigs. It is suggested only 1 thing at a time is easier and I agree with that completely. I quit cigs after3 years sober I think.

Listen, being accountable is huge for an addict. That is why you did not like having to call a sponsor in the past.

The only thing I can suggest is what was told to me. Do what you don't want to do, what can it hurt? It may just help you get sober. I have learned in recovery to follow by example. If people that I meet are sober, living a happy life, learning to be accountable to themselves first and others in life. Learning to not only enjoy life but live life on lifes terms, I am going to do what they do.

Keep it up, you will be okay I promise.

Dan

Everyone is different Allyson. Your body will need the time to cleanse itself. But you do need to surround yourself with others like you. A meeting went a long way for me to ease my fears of withdrawals.

Allyson S.

duh!! Told ya I was feeling foggy...

thanks!!!

Dan

Cool! Laughing is good. I'm sure you can find a meet in Boston too!

amandaleepiscea

Hi Allyson!
My name is Amanda and I am an addict. I don't get to come on here as often as I like, and I am kind of new to this online addition/enhancement to my recovery, but I have been clean for almost 2 1/2 years now - which is a miracle in itself - and I love having this available to me when I am at work too.

I understand your feeling funny that you "only" used pot. And you have gotten so many suggestions here already - I agree completely with what has been shared... including the part about taking it easy on yourself about the cigarette smoking. I am not there yet and I hope to find the willingness one day, but I am so happy to be able to say that days have passed in a row and I didn't have to get high. So - if the cigarettes are a trigger for you with regard to making you crave the pot even more, maybe you are doing a good thing, but try not to beat yourself up too hard in this process. take it easy.

I wanted to mention to you that in NA we encourage people to try their best to identify rather than compare. Meaning specifically that when we go to meetings and we listen to people share, we try to focus on the things that make us ALIKE rather than the things that differentiate us from one another. It is often hard to do, but what I found as a useful tool in the beginning was to "challenge" myself to find at LEAST one thing I could relate to from each and every person that shared at each meeting I went to. Slowly but surely it became habit and I find that I really DO belong. The ONLY requirement for membership is the DESIRE to stop using... check that out - it is from NA literature and it doesn't even add the word DRUGS on the end of there, so that means plain old honest to goodnes USING in any form that makes your life feel unmanageable. I have friends that embrace NA and are recovering who never even used specifically SUBSTANCES, but altered their minds through other kinds of behaviors... we all are members when we SAY we are members!

I was surprised too to hear you say that you couldn't find a lot of meetings and you are in Boston? Wow! I hope you are able to get to one because I think it would be womderful for you! You sound like you are ready to begin admitting... then comes the accepting. Go slow and ask for help. You will be ok as long as you don't try to do this alone!

love and light, amandalee

Allyson S.

Ok so maybe there weren't any meetings in my livingroom at the best time that is most convienient to me...I went back to the New England meeting site and made myself a list of places in the area by work as well as places not too far from home. There is a daily meeting at 12n not too far from my office...I will think about trying it. I am scared ******** to go...I guess that's part of admitting to having a problem with weed. It's most scarry b/c it's become a huge part of my identity. I have been a stoner my whole life...pot has been there longer then everyone else...but I am getting to the point where it has to go away. I can't imagine not ever smoking again. I know...one day at a time...I'll probably have to go to bed right when I get home from work and get this day behind me...

Thanks you are all very kind!!!

In memory of miracle

Welcome to SR Allyson.Im Trish and I am an addict.I am pullin for ya!

mackat

Heh Allyson
I'm an addict. I do NA. Remember that post 'bout the strait jacket and someone standing over ya? Sounds like one of my early sponsors!! There is a chair in NA with your name on it. Just like this forum, you need not be alone in this.
mackat

ted

HEY ALLYSON,WELCOME!ted HERE ADDICT/ALCOHOLIC.THE PLUS FOR YOU IS POT IS YOUR ONLY DRUG.I'M JUST SAYING IT COULD GET ALOT WORSE IF WE DON'T SEEK SOMEKIND OF HELP.VERY PROGRESSIVE DISEASE!GIVE IT A SHOT,SEE WHAT HAPPINS.I NEVER GOT STONED AT A MEETING!STAY STRONG ted :thumb