I can't do this anymore - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
Go Back   SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information >
Register Blogs FAQ Members List Calendar Arcade Mark Forums Read





Reply
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 08-31-2012, 07:39 AM   #1 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 22

I can't do this anymore


It's been 30 years of "social drinking" that went overboard now and then. Inside, I have always felt like the "overboards" really weren't ok, and I have felt torn because our culture laughs about drinking too much, talks about drinking all the time and makes it seem "normal."

I started running last year. Something about my metabolism must have changed -- I feel like physically/biologically I have a different reaction to alcohol now. Last March, after drinking Sangria with my husband, I became belligerent and very argumentative. I had never been like that. I was never one whose personality changed after drinking.

I decided to see if I could simply limit my alcohol. So I started drinking one weekend a month rather than every weekend. I started feeling much better, more at peace and a lot healthier.

Yesterday for the first time in years I purposefully went to the store to buy alcohol with the intent of using it for stress relief. My husband was out for the evening dealing with family matters, and I sat at home alone and downed nearly two bottles of wine.

Why? WHY did I do that? I don't even remember half of the evening, but I am ashamed, embarrassed, humiliated, angry and fed up.

I am SO over this, but I need help/support in stopping. I came online to seek support because I do not have the option of attending live in-person meetings in my community due to the fact that it is a small community and EVERYONE talks -- nothing is sacred, nothing is secret. Believe me, I have heard numerous names from others about "who I saw at an AA meeting!" I cannot go that route.

Help!
Jasmine1313 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Jasmine1313 For This Useful Post:
cocopuff3315 (10-29-2013), least (09-05-2012), RevivingOphelia (09-05-2012)
Old 08-31-2012, 07:47 AM   #2 (permalink)
Administrator
 
Anna's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 52,253
There are many ways to stop drinking, so just take a look around and you'll see lots of success stories.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html

The changes you've seen could be due, simply, to the progression of the disease. Alcoholism is a progressive disease and it will worsen until you stop drinking. Know that you can do this and find healthy ways to live.
__________________
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.

Marianne Williamson
Anna is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Anna For This Useful Post:
Dee74 (08-31-2012), RobbyRobot (08-31-2012)
Old 08-31-2012, 07:49 AM   #3 (permalink)
Canine Welfare Advocate
 
doggonecarl's Avatar
 

Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,320
Blog Entries: 22
Welcome to SR.

There are a lot of paths to the top of the mountain...there is more than one way to recover from alcoholism, if that's what you think your problem is.

Let me ask you, why would you be ashamed of being seen at an AA meeting, seeking to recover from an affliction not of your making?

Yet no one is ashamed to be seen at a bar...I just don't get it.
doggonecarl is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to doggonecarl For This Useful Post:
2granddaughters (08-31-2012), Sapling (09-05-2012)
Old 08-31-2012, 07:54 AM   #4 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by doggonecarl View Post
Welcome to SR.

There are a lot of paths to the top of the mountain...there is more than one way to recover from alcoholism, if that's what you think your problem is.

Let me ask you, why would you be ashamed of being seen at an AA meeting, seeking to recover from an affliction not of your making?

Yet no one is ashamed to be seen at a bar...I just don't get it.
Well, I guess it's not called AA for nothing, but in my town, believe me, nothing is anonymous. Ashamed isn't the word. I just don't want people in my personal business. I might feel funny being seen at a bar, though
Jasmine1313 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-31-2012, 07:57 AM   #5 (permalink)
Canine Welfare Advocate
 
doggonecarl's Avatar
 

Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,320
Blog Entries: 22
The good news is, as Anna points out, there are other recovery methods.

Sometimes it's the struggle that determines the solution, and the lengths we will go to seek it.

Good luck. And again, welcome. SR has been my number one life line to a sober life.
doggonecarl is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to doggonecarl For This Useful Post:
Jasmine1313 (08-31-2012), least (09-05-2012), Quinne (09-05-2012)
Old 08-31-2012, 08:09 AM   #6 (permalink)
Member
 
Saliena's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 521
Welcome to SR!!! Yes there are many ways to get sober! I have tried them all... AA was the one that finally worked for me. But, I can understand your hesistation. Take your time check out the site. Check out the other ways. There is no one right way... the only right way to stop drinking is to start. We all need help with the stopping.
Saliena is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Saliena For This Useful Post:
jaz06 (08-31-2012), Sapling (08-31-2012), tomsteve (08-31-2012)
Old 08-31-2012, 08:18 AM   #7 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 9,003
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jasmine1313 View Post
Believe me, I have heard numerous names from others about "who I saw at an AA meeting!"
Are they getting sober? I didn't really care who saw me at an AA meeting...I was only there to save my life...If they want to knock me for that...Have at it!.....Like what was said...There are others ways...Find one that works for you.
Sapling is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Sapling For This Useful Post:
doggonecarl (08-31-2012), tomsteve (08-31-2012)
Old 08-31-2012, 08:32 AM   #8 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Canada. About as far south as you can get
Posts: 4,768
Jasmine1313, please Google and read AA's "The Doctors Opinion", "How It Works" and "The Promises of Alcoholics Anonymous". See if they pertain to you.
Alcoholism is a progressive disease. When you get to the AA meetings you will find that out.

In our AA group is ministers, priests, lawyers, doctors and the Chief-of-police. The Chief's son spoke at the open meeting last night.

If you were dying of heart failure and the very Dr who could save you was a Republican and not a Democrat would you refuse his services ??

Many here will say that there are different ways to sobriety. If you are an alcoholic as described in the AA documents there is only one way. It's your call.

I believe you are realizing this isn't a game. All the best.

Bob R
2granddaughters is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to 2granddaughters For This Useful Post:
Sapling (08-31-2012), tomsteve (08-31-2012)
Old 08-31-2012, 08:34 AM   #9 (permalink)
Member
 
tomsteve's Avatar
 

Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,286
there are many different routes to recovery.
in my case, i didnt care who saw me fall off a bar stool and act like an idiot so i didnt care who saw me at an AA meeting and who knew. it was better for them to see i was doin something about my problem with alcohol.
__________________
all big book quotes from 1st edition
tomsteve is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to tomsteve For This Useful Post:
2granddaughters (08-31-2012), Sapling (08-31-2012)
Old 08-31-2012, 03:42 PM   #10 (permalink)
Administrator
 
Dee74's Avatar
 

Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 180,538
Blog Entries: 1
Welcome Jasmine

Please do look at the link Anna posted - I think there's more than enough approaches there to suit anyone.

Many methods now have online options...some, like Rational Recovery, have no meetings at all.

I recommend you visit the Secular Connections forum if you think you may benefit from a non 12 step approach, like RR or SMART etc.

D
__________________
Dee74 is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Dee74 For This Useful Post:
RobbyRobot (08-31-2012)
Old 09-05-2012, 04:42 AM   #11 (permalink)
Member
 
ashbyee's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Texas
Posts: 64
Jasmine1313- welcome you have come to the right place. You will find a tremendous amount of support and a wealth of knowledge here at SR.
Ashbyee
ashbyee is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-05-2012, 06:08 AM   #12 (permalink)
sobriety date 5-2-12
 
aeo1313's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 903
Welcome...do some reading on these boards, read the Big Book, read other books...etc. I started out in AA, but after a few months decided it wasn't the best route for me and I've been using more AVRT principles. You can get sober- you just need to want to.
aeo1313 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 12:07 AM.