Wanting a Change
And
you know what ...
This site ... The encouragement ... the threads ... the real people ...
Is what I use when that little demon sits on my shoulder ... waving a post-it-note
With a phone number on it ....
I used to flick him off ... he had a freakin' ladder ...
climbed right back up.
Well ... he still climbs ....
and my body still throws him that !@*!%$ ladder.
But as my husband has said (imagine a big burly southern gentleman)
"Baby, next time he is on our shoulder ... we are breakin' out the BIG BELT ! !"
Come on Day 5.
I gotcha !!!
you know what ...
This site ... The encouragement ... the threads ... the real people ...
Is what I use when that little demon sits on my shoulder ... waving a post-it-note
With a phone number on it ....
I used to flick him off ... he had a freakin' ladder ...
climbed right back up.
Well ... he still climbs ....
and my body still throws him that !@*!%$ ladder.
But as my husband has said (imagine a big burly southern gentleman)
"Baby, next time he is on our shoulder ... we are breakin' out the BIG BELT ! !"
Come on Day 5.
I gotcha !!!
Firstly jeni
thanks for that post. it really helped me with my 'husband' situation at the moment. Made me feel hope. xx
Butterfly, you are coming on in leaps and bounds. The sleepless nights will have been worth all you will achieve. I'll bet that once your body adjusts a bit more, you will sleep for England!
We are all in this boat together and together we will beat our demons.
big hugs
Gxx
thanks for that post. it really helped me with my 'husband' situation at the moment. Made me feel hope. xx
Butterfly, you are coming on in leaps and bounds. The sleepless nights will have been worth all you will achieve. I'll bet that once your body adjusts a bit more, you will sleep for England!
We are all in this boat together and together we will beat our demons.
big hugs
Gxx
Almost through day 5 together.
Weird how we are almost having to "re-learn" each other.
Over and over, we are saying "what was that expression for?" or "why did you look at me like that?"
The haze is lifting. Slowly.
A new page has been turned ...
Oh please let the hell we are going through now be worth the joy that we will find together at the end of this journey.
I am scared to feel again.
But I'm ready to feel again.
Body cramps and spasms are easing ... now the emotions are kicking back in after years of numbing them.
***holding on for the next phase of this ride***
Weird how we are almost having to "re-learn" each other.
Over and over, we are saying "what was that expression for?" or "why did you look at me like that?"
The haze is lifting. Slowly.
A new page has been turned ...
Oh please let the hell we are going through now be worth the joy that we will find together at the end of this journey.
I am scared to feel again.
But I'm ready to feel again.
Body cramps and spasms are easing ... now the emotions are kicking back in after years of numbing them.
***holding on for the next phase of this ride***
Day 6 .... almost over.
Still clean.
Still re-learning life.
This is getting easier.
Hubby and I are going out to a nice dinner to celebrate Day 7 ...or week one!
WoooHoo!
3 days ago I wanted to die ....
Now I can't wait to live!!
Still clean.
Still re-learning life.
This is getting easier.
Hubby and I are going out to a nice dinner to celebrate Day 7 ...or week one!
WoooHoo!
3 days ago I wanted to die ....
Now I can't wait to live!!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 3
Wanting a change, finding Friday night hard...
This is day 8 for me of sobriety -- seven days ago I asked my MD for an Antabuse Rx, and starting taking it, so....even if I wanted (based on my own paranoia and sensitivity to prescriptions), I wouldn't be drinking for 14 days.
I can't help thinking of that -- the 14 days.
My drinking was not out of control in a Great Big Public Way, but privately, at home, my consumption in the late evenings was at a level I felt pretty uncomfortable with. So, of course, I'd ponder this...and have another drink.
I know, I *asked* for the prescription, and in some sense, I'm waiting to feel proud and happy with myself. Right now, I feel like a child -- in some odd way I'd identified drinking with being an adult. Nothing like being a child on a Friday night.
I realize this isn't the most sparkly upbeat "let me introduce myself" post -- I'd read sober recovery forums for about a year, in truth. I know that I'll wake up tomorrow feeling alert, not hungover, and that I'll definitely remember every email I'll send tonight. But geez, Friday nights are difficult.
Thank you for listening (er, reading).
I can't help thinking of that -- the 14 days.
My drinking was not out of control in a Great Big Public Way, but privately, at home, my consumption in the late evenings was at a level I felt pretty uncomfortable with. So, of course, I'd ponder this...and have another drink.
I know, I *asked* for the prescription, and in some sense, I'm waiting to feel proud and happy with myself. Right now, I feel like a child -- in some odd way I'd identified drinking with being an adult. Nothing like being a child on a Friday night.
I realize this isn't the most sparkly upbeat "let me introduce myself" post -- I'd read sober recovery forums for about a year, in truth. I know that I'll wake up tomorrow feeling alert, not hungover, and that I'll definitely remember every email I'll send tonight. But geez, Friday nights are difficult.
Thank you for listening (er, reading).
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Missouri
Posts: 44
Butterfly, you are amazing!! You really have had it hard and you have kept going forward! What a miracle!! Going to the grocery store?! You are a super-hero in my eyes!! I just got in the car and went to Michaels Craft Store today. egh. That place is a nightmare even without WD and I don't think I will ever go in there again!! But I know what you mean. But you did it! Next week you will be doing even bigger stuff. Focus on doing some things you don't want to do, but think you will survive doing, and allow yourself times when it's ok to just be whooped, because you have done SO MUCH!! Thats where i'm at right now. I'm so glad to hear you are doing so well. Hang in there!!
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)