R3COV3RY

Hi everyone,

So as I mentioned in another post I was charged with a DUI on Wednesday night and I've never felt so ashamed and awful in my entire life. I recently graduated college with a degree in civil engineering and I've been looking for a job for about a month now. I had a couple of interviews and I felt on top of the world. Everything changed Wednesday night. Now I'm facing losing my driver's license for two years and a blemish on my record that I'm sure some employers won't overlook. I'm trying to stay positive by looking at alternatives with public transportation and everything, but it just looks very grim. I'm feeling very scared about the future with a wife that has a new baby on the way. I came to the conclusion that I have a drinking problem and Thursday morning I decided I'm done with alcohol for good. It's never gotten me anywhere good and I'm done with it. I just hope it's not too late....can anyone tell me their stories of life after a DUI and drivers license suspension? Thanks everyone for your support

Taking5

Unless you were also in an accident while drunk, and assuming this is your first offense, there is no way you are going to lose your license for 2 years. Your gonna get a lot of fines, have to go to AA, and your suspension will probably be 90-180 days. And you can usually get a restricted license, which is back and forth from home, grocery store and church only, during most of that period.

You'll get past this. If you start going to AA now and documenting it, it may help in court.

R3COV3RY

Well, the problem is that Utah has recently introduced VERY strict DUI laws. First, I did cause an accident and someone said they were hurt (although later found out it is only minor bruising) but I was charged with DUI with bodily injury - class A misdemeanor. I also refused the breathalyzer because a lawyer friend of mine years back advised me to do this if I was pulled over and thought I would blow over the limit. Well, the laws have changed since then and now they throw the book at you for refusing the test. The DMV automatically suspends your license for 2 years for refusal to blow and then you have to have an interlocking ignition device for 3 years for refusal to blow (although I think the 2 years your license is suspended counts for 2 of them). From what I've been told, a restricted (hardship) license is almost never granted because the requirements are so stiff. I'm 26 and I have a blemish-free record, I'm in the military reserves, and I just graduated college near the top of my class so I have that going for me, but even in the best-case scenario here I'm still looking at some serious damage

Anna

Hi and Welcome,

I'm sorry for your situation, but you know it could have been a lot worse. Someone could have been badly injured or killed, so be thankful that everyone is safe. I just read a post on another thread which said 'Acceptance is the key, after that everything is easy'. This is the situation that you are in now, so accept it and figure out how to move forward.

I'm glad that you are stopping drinking. That's a really good decision and it's never to later to begin recovery.

DaveO

I had 2 Dui's in a 2 year period

The best advice I can give you is to listen, and do everything your lawyer tells you.

I hope you have quit drinking, and have found AA or another approved recovery program by your state.

Do not wait for a court to tell you what you will do, you need to start the process now with your sobriety.

Impurrfect

My only DUI was a year before you were born, but it remains on my record. I was given a restricted license, paid off the fine early and was released from probation.

Unfortunately, I didn't learn my lesson and I went from alcohol to opiates to crack until I got into recovery a little over 4-1/2 years ago.

I'm not saying this to discourage you. I say it because you have a precious gift in your reach (though I KNOW it doesn't seem like it). You can give yourself the gift of recovery, your child can grow up never seeing you drunk.

The consequences we bring on ourselves are tough...still dealing with mine (lost a few jobs and a nursing career along the way), but I wouldn't take all the money in the world for what I've learned, and the person I've become in recovery.

I agree on the AA meetings, just from what I know of DUI issues. Most courts want documented proof (have to get a paper signed) and it's better to start before they tell you. If AA doesn't work for you, personally I'd still go (to satisfy the court) but also seek out support that DOES work for you. SR is a great place for support, as are counselors knowledgeable about addiction, and other programs.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

Sparkydog

You made a mistake, you will get through it. Alot of people make this same mistake.

Lily

I had a DUI in 1987 in San Diego. I had a restricted license for a year and paid many fines, and had to do community service.

If you have learned from this, then the payment involved is a major inconvenince, but nothing more. Every single time you get bummed and fearful over it, remember what you have learned.

Don't let the devil steal your joy, what with a wife and a baby on the way? You will get through this, I was 23 and I remember much unnessary anxiety over it.

Dano1975

I got a DUI 7 months ago and my incident involved an accident that totaled my vehicle and the SUV I rear-ended. Luckily only I received minor injuries, the people in the other car were unhurt, just shaken up. I know how you're feeling right now, it will get better. I have my license back and am almost done with all the hoop jumping. I'm also 132 days sober with the help of AA and a great sponsor. You can't change what's happened, move forward. I recommend you get a good lawyer, even if you need to borrow money to do so, its worth it. Work the program, pay the fines, do the community service etc. put this behind you and embrace a positive sober future with your family. Good luck.

R3COV3RY

Thank you all so much for your kind words and your wisdom. Right now it's hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel but I'm glad to know that it's there. I hired an attorney the next morning even though it's financially tough, but I know that the courts are usually out for blood when you aren't represented. I just hope they can help me work out some kind of deal.

I'm glad to hear so many of you have experienced similar things and successfully made it through. I'm on day three of sobriety and it's tough but I'm making it. I made a promise to my wife and unborn son that I will never drink again and I absolutely mean that. I know it's going to be tough, but I think with the help of my family, God, and support groups like this I will be able to make good on my promise. I'm also going to look into some local AA meetings. I'm sure they will help and it can't be a bad thing form the courts' perspective. Thanks to all of you who are willing to share your experiences which provide that strength for others such as myself.

simplenoteasy

R3cov3ry-Sorry, you got into this. I went through a similar issue many years ago. I refused the test and lost my license for 1 year. I had to take the bus to my new job - I had just graduated - for 20 miles one way for a year. I know, sounds like a old man story and in a way it is. But I got through it. Wish you the best.

R3COV3RY

simplenoteasy - thank you for sharing this with me. It makes it so much easier knowing that people have been in a similar situation and made it through. I've been reading posts on here a lot this weekend and I'm starting to feel OK about things. Like Anna said, all I can do is accept what has happened an move forward. I actually got a full night's sleep last night! YAY

blackstrat6

I know a member here who killed their best friend drinking and driving..... Seems to me that is a much higher price than any fine. Try to look at the bright side and to deal with it one day at a time just like you would alcoholism or any other of lifes problems.
Glad you are ok and congrats on your baby!

stugotz

There is plenty of "life" after a DUI. Just not the on you expected. Just sayin...

ACT10Npack

If your not applying for a driving job then you should be okay. You will be surprise as how many people have a DUI. Just learn from it and do what you have to do to get pass it. Lots of fines, lose of licence (can get a restrict licence), DUI school (easy and test is not graded), community service and probation. You will have to stay off the alcohol and drugs when on probation. A lot of places don't test for alcohol, weird but true.

I'm still going threw my second DUI now. :-(

R3COV3RY

Thanks for the advice. Unfortunately, most civil engineering jobs require a drivers license because there are lots of visits to the site of the project and things like that so I think I'm screwed there. I'm not sure what other type of job I could get that would pay similar money either....that's what's giving me a lot of anxiety right now. I'm done with alcohol and I've never had a problem with drugs so hopefully that works in my favor.

Good luck with your 2nd DUI. I hope everything works out for you!

FoundmySelf

You know there is a lot of life after a DUI for you that is.

I am gonna give you a bit of tough love, and my opinion might not be real popular but so be it. I lost my 6 week old daughter and my husband to a drunk driver. There life ended

So although what lies ahead for you might not be ideal, you are alive and so is everyone else. You need to buck up now and accept that this is what lies ahead. Once you accept it and stop feeling sorry for yourself you will be able to find the courage to move forward with what needs to be done.

I wish you well on this journey. I will keep you close in my thoughts and hope that things work out for the best for you and your new little family

VolcomStone51

R3cov3ry - Well I can definitely give you a first hand experience for a DUI with a slight accident and in your professional field. I got a DUI on August 25th, 2010 and it was one of the worst experiences that I have ever had. I am an Environmental Engineer doing environmental consulting work and I had a job at the time and am still working for the same company. I was VERY shaken up when this happened, but it will pass. My best advice, which is what a few people have already said, is to just obtain a good lawyer and do what they say. In my opinion, and I believe you have already decided this, you should probably quit drinking, at least for now. The problems drinking can bring in addition to this situation cause me intense anxiety. I drank a month after the accident because the situation was just so much to handle and it made me mentally crazy! I made a personal choice to seek professional help at an inpatient treatment center, but that was what I needed for myself. I had a lot of questions/concerns about what I was going to do with my life, especially without drinking for almost 4 months (one month at inpatient and 3 months at a halfway house) until I drank again on February 6th and 7th, 2011. Since that day I have realized what I need to do with my life and have not taken a drink since. I am sharing this because this is what I found out was the most important thing about obtaining a DUI....facing what the reality was in regards to my drinking.

-Now for your general question as to what happened and whatnot concerning the DUI....my state, the wonderful state of Wisconsin, has very lax DUI laws but with a small accident it was still pretty intense. I received a 6 month suspension, but I was able to obtain an occupational license during this period (someone already explained what that is above and I'm sure you have already done the research), I had to go through 4 months of treatment for my substance abuse program mandated by the state (I did one month of inpatient and 3 months at a halfway house), and I had to install an IID in my car (zero tolerance) for one full year once I obtained my occupational license. Today, I am happier than I have been in a very long time and I get to remove the IID from my vehicle on NOVEMBER 3rd (next Thursday)!! As you can tell I am excited for this so that I can put this behind me and move on with my new sober life. If you have any further questions for me regarding this or how I dealt with my company, please let me know and feel free to PM me if you do not wish to put it all out there on a thread. Good luck to you, and although things look bleak, what doesn't kill us only makes us stronger.

R3COV3RY

Foundmyself - Thank you for the tough love. It's the kind that helps us grow the most. I'm so sorry about your loss.... I worry about my family on the road constantly and I'm so ashamed of myself and so upset with myself that I actually let myself do that. I would be an absolute wreck for the rest of my life if my drinking ever seriously hurt or killed someone. All the more reason I've decided to stop completely.

Volcom - glad to hear you were able to keep your job and manage to keep things together while you were sorting out the aftermath of the DUI. I wish I could say Utah is like Wisconsin with it's DUI laws, but unfortunately for me, it isn't. Utah recently passed more legislation making it one of the toughest states in the country on DUI offenders. I read into hardship licenses and it looks like they are basically impossible to get. Also, since I refused to take the breathalyzer I'm facing an automatic 3 years of having an IID on my car I'm not sure, but I think the 2 year suspension is part of that time, so by the time I get my license back I'll have the IID on there for a year. Hopefully it's not in addition to the suspension time :S. But as another member said, it's time to stop feeling bad for myself and start moving forward. That's what I plan to do. I'm quitting drinking altogether and living completely sober. I think it's going to be next to impossible to find an engineering job that doesn't require me to drive (as I'm sure you know) but I'll keep looking until something pans out. Hopefully I can find an employer who is sympathetic and willing to cut me a break.

Thanks again to everyone for the kind words and advice.

VolcomStone51

Good luck with the DUI situation and with finding a job. The DUI situation will just happen how it is supposed to happen, and as long as you do quit drinking and follow the courts and you lawyers advice you will be fine. As for the job, I'm sure you area a very intelligent person, and that has not changed. You just need to keep working at aquiring a job with confidence!! There are plenty of jobs out there that are predominantly design and will not require driving, but yes I do know that many civil/environmental engineering job require their employees to drive. I'm sure you will find an employer that will work with you, and I'm sure afer this humbling experience you will be a very hard working and loyal employee. This is what happened to me, not that I wasn't a good employee before, but after my employer worked with me and knew what I needed to do, my work ethic and work product is better than it has ever been before. Good Luck!!