hi please read
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 34
Hey Both Sams... You guys can absolutely do this.
Samwitch, congrats on day 2. Just keep telling yourself you are just giving yourself a break from having to worry about wine. The days will add up before you know it!
Samneed... the PPs are right, dump that box as soon as you can. It will make you feel empowered, I promise you. The day I decided I was done obsessing with wine I took 2 nearly full boxes of wine (one white and one red) and poured them down the drain. I can't tell you how strong I felt after doing that, and I think just that one action has helped me maintain. Realizing that I was strong enough to dump it all helped me realize I'd be strong enough to take my "break".
Samwitch, congrats on day 2. Just keep telling yourself you are just giving yourself a break from having to worry about wine. The days will add up before you know it!
Samneed... the PPs are right, dump that box as soon as you can. It will make you feel empowered, I promise you. The day I decided I was done obsessing with wine I took 2 nearly full boxes of wine (one white and one red) and poured them down the drain. I can't tell you how strong I felt after doing that, and I think just that one action has helped me maintain. Realizing that I was strong enough to dump it all helped me realize I'd be strong enough to take my "break".
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,550
Hi Samneedshelp:
I see you're in New York. Does that mean New York City? Well, anyway, in a large metropolitan area? If so, then there should be lots of different facilities, groups that can help you, whether AA or something else. You need the support of others. And you need the help of a doctor. If you don't want to go to your regular doctor about this, then try another doctor. Get a name from someone in AA or a similar group or from some agency. There are lots of options available to you. Trying to do it alone and trying to conceal it from those with whom live is very stressful and the stress is likely to make quitting all the harder. Right now you've got medical issues to deal with. Start with that. Get help with the medical stuff and go on from there getting help from a group of your choosing, whether AA or something else. Reach out. There are lots of hands out there ready to reach out for you.
W.
I see you're in New York. Does that mean New York City? Well, anyway, in a large metropolitan area? If so, then there should be lots of different facilities, groups that can help you, whether AA or something else. You need the support of others. And you need the help of a doctor. If you don't want to go to your regular doctor about this, then try another doctor. Get a name from someone in AA or a similar group or from some agency. There are lots of options available to you. Trying to do it alone and trying to conceal it from those with whom live is very stressful and the stress is likely to make quitting all the harder. Right now you've got medical issues to deal with. Start with that. Get help with the medical stuff and go on from there getting help from a group of your choosing, whether AA or something else. Reach out. There are lots of hands out there ready to reach out for you.
W.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: new york
Posts: 12
i'm in upstate ny, a rather small town. people here are telling me to see my doctor. i will not do that. nor will i join AA. i can't do those things. i have my reasons. the best i can say is i will quit when the box of wine is gone. i did plan to go out and buy more today, but i changed my mind and don't plan on buying any more. i consider that a start.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,454
Hi samneedshelp
I really recommend you see a Dr or at least go to the ER.
Not trying to scare you, but noone can predict what might or might not happen to you...lots of people are fine with detox...I wasn't tho - and I wish I'd seen a Dr.
We do have a thread that may give you a general idea tho -
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html
You'll find a lot of support here too
Welcome!
D
I really recommend you see a Dr or at least go to the ER.
Not trying to scare you, but noone can predict what might or might not happen to you...lots of people are fine with detox...I wasn't tho - and I wish I'd seen a Dr.
We do have a thread that may give you a general idea tho -
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html
You'll find a lot of support here too
Welcome!
D
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Glasgow Scotland
Posts: 32
Sam no one here can advise you medicaly as we are not doctors, Some people need help to stop some have managed with out but only you will experience what you will experience which could be easy or difficult. I drank about 2 bottles of wine a night three on a bad bad night. I also have a heart condition. Like you I didnt want to go to a doctor because of my job etc but that could have cost me my life many times............fortunatly I managed by with no real symptoms bar insomnia this time, but on past occasions I had shakes, sweats, palpatations, vomiting,and the rest I was really ill. I had auditory hallucinations and shivering. Iv had to ask myself what is more important my job or my life? In hind sight I think I was pretty dumb detoxing on my own as I didnt know what was around the corner. I hope you come up with the answer thats best for you. I wish you all the best Sam x x x x
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
Sam, You have the idea in your head to make a change; it comes from having made a decision to stop drinking. Whenever you stop drinking, it will be 'now', except it will be then (if you follow). You can choose to quit this instant, or not. Which of these options has a downside?
I made my choice on a Monday morning at 9:30. At 9:40, there was no more beer, vodka, or wine in the house. Done. There have been thoughts to drink again, but I know that is just the part of me that likes getting drunk, and I don't do that anymore.
AA is another popular avenue to follow. Whatever path you choose, stop delaying putting your fabulous decision to not drink anymore. Now is the only time to do it.
Good luck to the Sams, and stick around SR. It has been my inspiration.
I made my choice on a Monday morning at 9:30. At 9:40, there was no more beer, vodka, or wine in the house. Done. There have been thoughts to drink again, but I know that is just the part of me that likes getting drunk, and I don't do that anymore.
AA is another popular avenue to follow. Whatever path you choose, stop delaying putting your fabulous decision to not drink anymore. Now is the only time to do it.
Good luck to the Sams, and stick around SR. It has been my inspiration.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,454
Alcohol withdrawal can be life-threatening in some cases, Sam
I prefer not to push that angle - I figure you're scared enough, right?
It makes more sense for me to suggest that medical supervision is your best option - that way you're covered, no matter what might happen
D
I prefer not to push that angle - I figure you're scared enough, right?
It makes more sense for me to suggest that medical supervision is your best option - that way you're covered, no matter what might happen
D
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 200
Sam, I am new in recovery but I know we cannot do this alone. Why are you resistant to talk to your doctor or go to AA? I say toss the rest of the wine when you're ready to stop which sounds like NOW to me. If you keep it, you have a greater chance of obsessing over "one last drink" and your brain will convince you to go get more.
You don't have to do this alone. If you start having really uncomfortable w/d's, go to the hospital. We are only as sick as our secrets.
You don't have to do this alone. If you start having really uncomfortable w/d's, go to the hospital. We are only as sick as our secrets.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,550
Sam: You make it sound like it's so easy! All I can say is that I spent forty years saying just what you're saying now, "I'm going to quit when this one's gone. I really mean it this time!" And the trouble is that you really do mean it! That is your body, desperately concerned about maintaining its supply of alcohol, has temporarily taken over your conscious mental processes and is saying this to you, "Sam, you can quit, but quit tomorrow, not today. Today you can have that last drink. You need it to sleep since you've got to build your strength up." And guess what! Tomorrow will come and then there will be another tomorrow. I had forty years of "tomorrows" and I lived "one day at a time", one drinking day at a time. Each day utterly convinced that that day would be the end of my problem.
This is now a medical situation and you are self medicating- with alcohol. You say you have your "reasons" for not going to a doctor or seeking help from a group. I believe you. You do indeed have your "reasons". Your body does not want you to stop drinking because it had developed an addictive dependency which can ultimately kill you. If it does not kill you it will take away everything you hold dear. I too had my "reasons" for not seeking proper medical help, not seeking group support. All for forty years i had my "reasons". I hear you talking and I hear it loud and clear.
W.
This is now a medical situation and you are self medicating- with alcohol. You say you have your "reasons" for not going to a doctor or seeking help from a group. I believe you. You do indeed have your "reasons". Your body does not want you to stop drinking because it had developed an addictive dependency which can ultimately kill you. If it does not kill you it will take away everything you hold dear. I too had my "reasons" for not seeking proper medical help, not seeking group support. All for forty years i had my "reasons". I hear you talking and I hear it loud and clear.
W.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,550
Sam:
There are really two things going on here. The first is that many folks on this website have spoken in strong terms urging you to see a doctor. You say that you have "reasons" not to do so. You have been told that your life may be at risk. In addition, I'm sure you must realize that it's not simply a matter of your life but that you might also have a stroke, which could mean a lifetime of being disabled in some fashion. It is difficult to see any rational reason why a person would want to take this chance.
The second thing is your apparent developing addiction. If you don't quit drinking this could easily get worse, with devastating consequences to yourself and to others. You say you may be able to quit on your own. People have done that and you can seek help along those lines on this website. My own experience was that I could not do it on my own. I tried and failed over a period of forty years. Good luck on whatever you decide to do. Keep in touch. This is a good website and the folks here generally know what they are talking about.
W.
There are really two things going on here. The first is that many folks on this website have spoken in strong terms urging you to see a doctor. You say that you have "reasons" not to do so. You have been told that your life may be at risk. In addition, I'm sure you must realize that it's not simply a matter of your life but that you might also have a stroke, which could mean a lifetime of being disabled in some fashion. It is difficult to see any rational reason why a person would want to take this chance.
The second thing is your apparent developing addiction. If you don't quit drinking this could easily get worse, with devastating consequences to yourself and to others. You say you may be able to quit on your own. People have done that and you can seek help along those lines on this website. My own experience was that I could not do it on my own. I tried and failed over a period of forty years. Good luck on whatever you decide to do. Keep in touch. This is a good website and the folks here generally know what they are talking about.
W.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: new york
Posts: 12
i just don't know what i'm going to do today. i want to go buy more wine today and i just might do that. i'm scared to go cold turkey so i'm thinking i will begin to cut down and make a box of wine last a week and go from there. i'm such a mess and mad at myself for getting where i am now. sam
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,550
Sam: It's not just a matter of detoxing. You might possibly be able to do that by yourself, but at great risk. I believe that all of us are advising you strongly to get medical help. There must be some way of getting that without everyone knowing about your problem, which I gather, may be your concern. I believe that even in a small community you can get medical advice on a strictly confidential basis.
But the other problem is that even if you are successful in a "self detox", in the period after this you will be at maximum risk to resume all over again and if this happens you are likely to be even worse off since you will be so disappointed.
There is a way out. Get yourself some medical help on a confidential basis and then look for some group support or the support of someone who has managed to stay sober. Good luck.
W.
But the other problem is that even if you are successful in a "self detox", in the period after this you will be at maximum risk to resume all over again and if this happens you are likely to be even worse off since you will be so disappointed.
There is a way out. Get yourself some medical help on a confidential basis and then look for some group support or the support of someone who has managed to stay sober. Good luck.
W.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Florida
Posts: 34
Hi Sam... A 5L box of wine contains approximately 6.6 bottles of wine so if my math is correct sounds like you are drinking approximately a bottle to 1.5 bottles of wine per day? I just wanted you know that I was drinking as much or more (MUCH more on the weekend) than you and had no trouble with withdrawals at home. I totally agree with all of the PP posters about doing everything regarding getting off the sauce with medical help, but if you are dead set against it, I just wanted to let you know about my experience.
My first 3 days were pretty hard because I was filled with anxiety. I have suffered anxiety issues for 15 years or more. Even after 30+ days alcohol free, I still suffer major anxiety at times. I also had/have a hard time with sleep issues. I still find it very difficult to sleep through the night. I had some slight shaking hands and a general hangover feeling for the first few days but those things went away quickly and weren't too bad. I was still able to take care of my 3 year old, work and exercise. My daily life wasn't affected much.
I think what I am trying to tell you is please don't go out and get that new box of wine. If you are ready to quit, just start today. I have seen a lot of people use the fear of detox as a reason to keep drinking (myself included to some extent). Again, just try it. Just give yourself a break and see what happens.
My first 3 days were pretty hard because I was filled with anxiety. I have suffered anxiety issues for 15 years or more. Even after 30+ days alcohol free, I still suffer major anxiety at times. I also had/have a hard time with sleep issues. I still find it very difficult to sleep through the night. I had some slight shaking hands and a general hangover feeling for the first few days but those things went away quickly and weren't too bad. I was still able to take care of my 3 year old, work and exercise. My daily life wasn't affected much.
I think what I am trying to tell you is please don't go out and get that new box of wine. If you are ready to quit, just start today. I have seen a lot of people use the fear of detox as a reason to keep drinking (myself included to some extent). Again, just try it. Just give yourself a break and see what happens.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,550
I agree with this last post by Jelly. But I still say that it's far better to get medical help if at all possible. Again, I would think that this would be possible on a confidential basis, even if you have to go to a nearby town. I think you'd feel a lot better about yourself immediately if you talk to a doctor.
So the detox comes first and after the first three or four days things start to feel better. Meanwhile, watch TV, try to keep your mind off it, get some exercise if possible, avoid friends who drink, etc. etc. Then when you're feeling better, watch out! That's just when your body, starved of alcohol, is likely to ambush and blindside you. It's very, very helpful to have the companionship of some person who has been through all this, whether AA or some other approach, such as Rational Recovery (some folks recommend Jack Trimpey's book). Even those who reject AA often speak of the importance of having a definite program, or "Big Plan" as they call it. A lot of what I'm hearing from your posts sounds like what the Rational Recovery folks call the "Addictive Voice". They say you won't be able to quit until you do something about that Voice that is telling you to drink. Some say that they've been able to do just that. Myself, I found that I could not get long term sobriety without the help of some kind of group.
W.
So the detox comes first and after the first three or four days things start to feel better. Meanwhile, watch TV, try to keep your mind off it, get some exercise if possible, avoid friends who drink, etc. etc. Then when you're feeling better, watch out! That's just when your body, starved of alcohol, is likely to ambush and blindside you. It's very, very helpful to have the companionship of some person who has been through all this, whether AA or some other approach, such as Rational Recovery (some folks recommend Jack Trimpey's book). Even those who reject AA often speak of the importance of having a definite program, or "Big Plan" as they call it. A lot of what I'm hearing from your posts sounds like what the Rational Recovery folks call the "Addictive Voice". They say you won't be able to quit until you do something about that Voice that is telling you to drink. Some say that they've been able to do just that. Myself, I found that I could not get long term sobriety without the help of some kind of group.
W.
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