Dont know where to start
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: The Sooner State
Posts: 1,725
Originally Posted by Kjell 
Hi Brooks-
Do you think you're an alcoholic? Posting here is a GREAT first step btw.
Kjell
Do you think you're an alcoholic? Posting here is a GREAT first step btw.
Kjell
I know 100% in my heart I am. Sucks to admit but I know I am. I drink everynight and weekends are a blur. I drink until I pass out. Im fuzzy in the mornings and I skip events so that I can drink. But today is day 3 of no alcohol!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Pepperell MA
Posts: 10
I also had gastric bypass 6 years ago. I lost 140 lbs and traded one addiction for another (as many gastric bypass patients do) I wasn't a big drinker before the surgery and stayed away from it, per the surgeon's instructions, for 3 years. The very first time I tried wine after my surgery, I realized how easy it was to get buzzed and I was hooked. Within 6 months I was up to a large bottle of wine every night. I have been struggling for the past 6 months to quit. I went to my dr and got Antabuse, but with the absorption issues from the bypass, it didn't help. I have been going to AA and I am learning a lot. I get 2 weeks here, 30 days there but always pick up again. I am on day 16 right now and hopefully it will stick.
So as many others have suggested....speak to your dr and get a support system. My dh was/is a big drinker and we ended up seperating 4 months ago. His drinking was obviously a huge issue for me while I was trying so hard to quit.
Good Luck! You look fabulous in your profile pic btw. Beautiful! Congratulations on the weight loss. Just read your last post and wanted to share. I also live in a VERY small town and have lived here all my life. I was SO worried about walkign into that meeting! I run a home daycare and was thinking if people saw me, NO ONE would want me caring for their kids, right? It's completely NOT like that. It was rough at first. uncomfortable...I kept my eyes on the floor, sat in the back, left immediately after the meeting. Now, I look farward to going. I enjoy chatting with the friends I have met (or reconnected with). It is such a supportive, friendly, welcoming environment. I am so grateful to have my meetings now - just go and try it. Try a few. You'll be happy you did. And trust me that most people had the same thoughts about walking into their first meeting as you are having!
So as many others have suggested....speak to your dr and get a support system. My dh was/is a big drinker and we ended up seperating 4 months ago. His drinking was obviously a huge issue for me while I was trying so hard to quit.
Good Luck! You look fabulous in your profile pic btw. Beautiful! Congratulations on the weight loss. Just read your last post and wanted to share. I also live in a VERY small town and have lived here all my life. I was SO worried about walkign into that meeting! I run a home daycare and was thinking if people saw me, NO ONE would want me caring for their kids, right? It's completely NOT like that. It was rough at first. uncomfortable...I kept my eyes on the floor, sat in the back, left immediately after the meeting. Now, I look farward to going. I enjoy chatting with the friends I have met (or reconnected with). It is such a supportive, friendly, welcoming environment. I am so grateful to have my meetings now - just go and try it. Try a few. You'll be happy you did. And trust me that most people had the same thoughts about walking into their first meeting as you are having!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: CA
Posts: 268
Originally Posted by Saliena
Hey Brook,
I to had a gastric bypass ... 8 years ago. I lost alittle over 200 pounds and have been able to keep off the weight. But, I did replace one addiction for another. If you talk to your doctor he should be able to explain why drinking effects people who have had a gastric bypass so differently. It has to do with the fact that we don't have a stomach to process the liquior.
But, the best advice I can offer is if you truly want to stop drinking (and it sounds like you do) is to build up a support system of people around you. It is amazing how scared I was when I first did that... telling my doctor, telling my husband, telling my friends (or not telling them)... but, it was 100% needed for me to stay sober. I am only 50 days in but, life does get better. And, it does get easier.
Know you aren't the only one out there... if you want to talk feel free to IM me and I can send you my phone number. It is helpful to have people you can talk to. I remember my first week sober was HELL. I had to walk out of the grocery store at one point and just leave my cart there... because, I had such a need to want to buy wine. But, hey it worked!
Good luck!
Saliena
I to had a gastric bypass ... 8 years ago. I lost alittle over 200 pounds and have been able to keep off the weight. But, I did replace one addiction for another. If you talk to your doctor he should be able to explain why drinking effects people who have had a gastric bypass so differently. It has to do with the fact that we don't have a stomach to process the liquior.
But, the best advice I can offer is if you truly want to stop drinking (and it sounds like you do) is to build up a support system of people around you. It is amazing how scared I was when I first did that... telling my doctor, telling my husband, telling my friends (or not telling them)... but, it was 100% needed for me to stay sober. I am only 50 days in but, life does get better. And, it does get easier.
Know you aren't the only one out there... if you want to talk feel free to IM me and I can send you my phone number. It is helpful to have people you can talk to. I remember my first week sober was HELL. I had to walk out of the grocery store at one point and just leave my cart there... because, I had such a need to want to buy wine. But, hey it worked!
Good luck!
Saliena
I've done that with many different substances....drugs/alcohol/food - there has to be a core reason that we stuff our faces or ingest chemicals. I suppose we will continue doing it in one form or another until we can get to the bottom of it all.
Good luck and keep posting - great job!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: The Sooner State
Posts: 1,725
WHOA...Im tearing up now. Im glad you posted to me. I have felt like I was on a deserted island since Monday...I dont know. And yes..I will try a meeting. Thank you!
Originally Posted by jenn8671
I also had gastric bypass 6 years ago. I lost 140 lbs and traded one addiction for another (as many gastric bypass patients do) I wasn't a big drinker before the surgery and stayed away from it, per the surgeon's instructions, for 3 years. The very first time I tried wine after my surgery, I realized how easy it was to get buzzed and I was hooked. Within 6 months I was up to a large bottle of wine every night. I have been struggling for the past 6 months to quit. I went to my dr and got Antabuse, but with the absorption issues from the bypass, it didn't help. I have been going to AA and I am learning a lot. I get 2 weeks here, 30 days there but always pick up again. I am on day 16 right now and hopefully it will stick.
So as many others have suggested....speak to your dr and get a support system. My dh was/is a big drinker and we ended up seperating 4 months ago. His drinking was obviously a huge issue for me while I was trying so hard to quit.
Good Luck! You look fabulous in your profile pic btw. Beautiful! Congratulations on the weight loss. Just read your last post and wanted to share. I also live in a VERY small town and have lived here all my life. I was SO worried about walkign into that meeting! I run a home daycare and was thinking if people saw me, NO ONE would want me caring for their kids, right? It's completely NOT like that. It was rough at first. uncomfortable...I kept my eyes on the floor, sat in the back, left immediately after the meeting. Now, I look farward to going. I enjoy chatting with the friends I have met (or reconnected with). It is such a supportive, friendly, welcoming environment. I am so grateful to have my meetings now - just go and try it. Try a few. You'll be happy you did. And trust me that most people had the same thoughts about walking into their first meeting as you are having!
So as many others have suggested....speak to your dr and get a support system. My dh was/is a big drinker and we ended up seperating 4 months ago. His drinking was obviously a huge issue for me while I was trying so hard to quit.
Good Luck! You look fabulous in your profile pic btw. Beautiful! Congratulations on the weight loss. Just read your last post and wanted to share. I also live in a VERY small town and have lived here all my life. I was SO worried about walkign into that meeting! I run a home daycare and was thinking if people saw me, NO ONE would want me caring for their kids, right? It's completely NOT like that. It was rough at first. uncomfortable...I kept my eyes on the floor, sat in the back, left immediately after the meeting. Now, I look farward to going. I enjoy chatting with the friends I have met (or reconnected with). It is such a supportive, friendly, welcoming environment. I am so grateful to have my meetings now - just go and try it. Try a few. You'll be happy you did. And trust me that most people had the same thoughts about walking into their first meeting as you are having!
i've done my almost
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 1,934
Originally Posted by OklaBH
I know 100% in my heart I am. Sucks to admit but I know I am. I drink everynight and weekends are a blur. I drink until I pass out. Im fuzzy in the mornings and I skip events so that I can drink. But today is day 3 of no alcohol!
Blacking out, drinking when you really don't want to, being unable to control how much you drink and what you do while drunk are good indications you qualify for alcoholism.
AA saved my life. AA changed my life and removed the obession of drinking. It's been over a year since my last drink, but I'm not special. It can work for you too.
You never have to drink again.
How F$#KING cool is that?
Kjell
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: des moines ia
Posts: 362
OklaBH, There are a couple of funny truths in AA (yes you'll here a lot of laughter at meetings) 1. We'd walk down the sidewalk drunk as a skunk and not care who sees us, but our first AA meeting we park 2 blocks away and sneak down the alleys to get there. 2. If you like the people you drink with you'll like us, we're the same people ! The only difference is you remember the meetings. ; ) You might be amazed at the people you meet there ! your minister, the mayor, your mom's best friend. Some where you'll see a sign that says "Who you see here and whats said here STAYS here" It is honored by all !!
Ron
ps. Most meetings are held in church basements. Cant think of a safer place to have people see ya come and go.
Ron
ps. Most meetings are held in church basements. Cant think of a safer place to have people see ya come and go.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: The Sooner State
Posts: 1,725
Ok..you convinced me 
Im going to find a meeting to go to before I leave for work. This is day 4! That means 3 nights in a row without a nightcap...or as I call it a "night bucket" Im making plans for the weekend so I dont turn to drinking. Wish me luck. Any and all advice is much appreciated!
Im going to find a meeting to go to before I leave for work. This is day 4! That means 3 nights in a row without a nightcap...or as I call it a "night bucket" Im making plans for the weekend so I dont turn to drinking. Wish me luck. Any and all advice is much appreciated!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 788
Be sure to look for a sponsor. This is what I need, too. I have only been to one meeting, and you are inspiring me to go to another. I read the thread here on sponsors, and realized I don't need a soul mate...just someone to help me start working the steps. Congratulations on all your hard work. Good luck tonight!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: des moines ia
Posts: 362
Originally Posted by OklaBH
Ok..you convinced me
Im going to find a meeting to go to before I leave for work. This is day 4! That means 3 nights in a row without a nightcap...or as I call it a "night bucket" Im making plans for the weekend so I dont turn to drinking. Wish me luck. Any and all advice is much appreciated!
Im going to find a meeting to go to before I leave for work. This is day 4! That means 3 nights in a row without a nightcap...or as I call it a "night bucket" Im making plans for the weekend so I dont turn to drinking. Wish me luck. Any and all advice is much appreciated!
All the best,
Ron
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: des moines ia
Posts: 362
Relax on the sponsor. Feel free to announce to the group that your looking for a sponsor. It is up to you to chose your sponsor. Do not feel obligated to take the first person that offers. There is nothing wrong with suggesting you get together for coffee to get to know each other better first. A sponsor may fire a sponsee at any time, as a sponsee may fire a sponsor at any time with NO hard feelings. Some of us need a drill Sargent, some, an ear to listen and a hand to guide. You'll find all kinds in AA just like real life ; ) You WILL want to stick with a female. Inter-sex sponsor relationships are not a good idea. First, get yourself a Big Book and a meeting schedule. At some point you will meet someone at a meeting that you really click with. Make friends with that person, they don't have to be your sponsor. It's just as important that you have AA bud's that you can hang with outside AA.
Best of luck,
Ron
Best of luck,
Ron
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: The Sooner State
Posts: 1,725
Originally Posted by ronf
Relax on the sponsor. Feel free to announce to the group that your looking for a sponsor. It is up to you to chose your sponsor. Do not feel obligated to take the first person that offers. There is nothing wrong with suggesting you get together for coffee to get to know each other better first. A sponsor may fire a sponsee at any time, as a sponsee may fire a sponsor at any time with NO hard feelings. Some of us need a drill Sargent, some, an ear to listen and a hand to guide. You'll find all kinds in AA just like real life ; ) You WILL want to stick with a female. Inter-sex sponsor relationships are not a good idea. First, get yourself a Big Book and a meeting schedule. At some point you will meet someone at a meeting that you really click with. Make friends with that person, they don't have to be your sponsor. It's just as important that you have AA bud's that you can hang with outside AA.
Best of luck,
Ron
Best of luck,
Ron
Thank you Ron. I hope all these changes become 2nd nature soon. Today I am going to lunch with a friend. Usually we will have a beer or 2 before heading back to work. She will be shocked when I stick with my iced tea!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Mt Holly NJ
Posts: 1
Originally Posted by OklaBH
I havent had a drink since Sunday. I know to most that doesnt seem like a big deal. To me it is. Yesterday my husband called me at work and let me know about a very unexpected money problem. I thought "Im soooo drinking tonight" BUT I didnt. I am bored after work though. I find myself going to bed early so I dont have to deal with wanting a drink. Im really dreading the weekend. I never thought I would say that before. Please someone, tell me this gets somewhat easier.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: The Sooner State
Posts: 1,725
Originally Posted by ronf
SOOOOOO ? (Sorry to sound like a sponser) Did ya go to a meeting ? ;0
5 DAYS !!!!!! That inspires me more than 20 years ! LOVE IT
Nosey Ron
5 DAYS !!!!!! That inspires me more than 20 years ! LOVE IT
Nosey Ron
Hello nosey ron! LOL I am going to one tomorrow after work and there is another meeting I may check out at 10:00 am on sunday. Im pretty pumped. Thanks for checking on me! 5 days feels like I won at the Olympics! LOL:rotfxko
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Southern California
Posts: 4
Great job, OklaBH! I am starting on Day one again today after a pretty bad relapse over the last few days so it was very encouraging to read through this post and see how positive you were after each day (and everyone else too!!).
Just a few more hours and I will be on day 2! Yay!
Eric
Just a few more hours and I will be on day 2! Yay!
Eric
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: The Sooner State
Posts: 1,725
day 1 again
I caved and had a drink yesterday. 2 beers and 3 glasses of wine to be exact. I felt so good and was so proud. I dont know why I took a step backward. Im very disappointed in myself. My husband is a new construction foreman and was called out of town for 2 months for work. I was fine until he left.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: des moines ia
Posts: 362
Originally Posted by ronf
OklaBH, WELCOME. It does get easier, BUT each day is different, especially in the beginning. For me it was a slow transition from mostly bad days to mostly good. I found face to face support very important. That's where AA came in for me. I'm now in my 15th year and every bit of the struggle was worth it. I am happy, calm, and comfortable in my own skin. You'll read many different approaches to our common goal. The one thread that runs through them all is...NOBODY has done this alone. ASK for help, ASK for support. You'll be amazed at the number of truly wonderful people in this world.
All the best,
Ron
All the best,
Ron
So ya drank...BFD. That's normal for us ! No need to get wound up. It's when you DON'T drink that you get wound up.Winston Churchill always signed off his correspondence with FDR with..."KBO" stands for "keep buggering on". Soooo
KBO, Ron
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