sleepie

That's great Vicious. Cool that you have a partner as well. Good for you

ViciousCycle

This is my second go-around with this quitting thing, Sleepie. I mean major go around. I have had hundreds of little tries.
We had a great group, class of January in 2009 and we kind of grew up together. So I have a few tools in the toolbox from that year, ya know? It sure helps this time around.

Keep plugging away and drawing info and stuff from the people here, it helps to help each other!

Stay strong today!

slipperyknot

Okee dokee... Day 4 here. Loved reading the posts. I was looking for a dec. 2010 group. Vicious - great idea on going home early from the parties. This is looking like a REALLY tough month for this but I have plans, only going to mandatory parties, only for a short time and staying away from most of my friends since they are all super heavy drinkers.

I don't have cravings, not yet anyways. I can't stop thinking about what a horrible ugly mess I woke up in at a friends house this weekend, then I go back over all the other times in the last 6 months I have blacked out, more then I can count, hit my head, bruises everywhere. I can not stop thinking about how horrible it is to innocently, or so I think, start drinking and it never, ever ends well. I know I have the tapes, waking up on the floor, waking up in a pee soaked mattress, seeing my friends look at me different and not knowing what I did because I blacked out. No one will tell me I have a drinking problem but now they don't have to. I know it in my bones, it sits on my shoulders and I am looking it in the eyes. I'm worried, not sure what the challenges are going to be but I have my clear head, my open heart and I am watching for that drinking brain, keeping an eye on the tricks.

This will be my first Christmas in 26 years that I will be sober, make cookies, laugh with family, play games and be present and I can not wait. It is going to be hard, I am going to be tough and I am looking forward to going through it all with you guys.

GirlFromCO

Day 8 here and feeling grateful for SR and sobriety. I'm about to have some coffee and head out on a long walk with the pup. Yesterday I did a lot of things on my to-do list and by the end of the evening I felt like I deserved a glass of wine for all that hard effort- what a joke. What I REALLY deserved was a nice hot bath and a good night's rest, not another miserable hangover. I hope all of us can stay strong today. Sleepie, you are in my thoughts

sleepie

Thank you Girl from CO

northland

sitting on day 3. feels so much longer than that for some reason. I'm already having those thoughts invade my mind convincing me it's okay to drink. I'll be damned, such a vicious cycle.

I drink, because I'm unhappy
I'm unhappy, because I drink




*thanks fat *******, for those words of wisdom. He was addicted to eating, but it's all the same

slipperyknot

[QUOTE=Yesterday I did a lot of things on my to-do list and by the end of the evening I felt like I deserved a glass of wine for all that hard effort- what a joke. What I REALLY deserved was a nice hot bath and a good night's rest, not another miserable hangover. [/QUOTE]

Thanks for this, I know at the end of the day I love a glass of wine, I feel like I deserve it. I am going to use the bath trick and see if I can exchange the wine for taking better care of me. Good luck everyone whose posting.

Dee74

Welcome back bjork, sleepie and BoozeFree.

D

ViciousCycle

Knot & GFC, you have such a positive attitude in this statement. It is so full of hope, opt for that bath. Just for tonight and see how this affects your mood in the morning. I bet you will feel so proud! I know it is hard, but you CAN. The first step is always the hardest. For me anyway. Then when I do it I wonder why it took me so long. Crazy.

Hence my name Northland. It truly is. But it can be broken. If I can do it, anyone can as I do not see myself as a hugely brave or strong person. I am very compulsive. This was very hard for me. I shut myself off from anyone for 3 days....it's what I needed as a kick start.

How's it going Booze Free ? Where are all our other peeps?

fdsajkll

day 1. crap.

MsCooterBrown

Day 1. *CLAPPING* not crap.

Dee74

Welcome back to you too fdsajkll
All of you guys who stumbled? what do you think you can add to what you've been doing?

D

sleepie

I'm all out of ideas. I already want another drink.

fdsajkll

when will i learn. Drinking makes me too sad. 13 days and now back to sad, depressed and anxious.... ugh so mad at myself....

Dee74

I found this article recently - it was pretty much what I did.

Surfing the Urge: Dealing with Cravings
Overcoming Life's Obstacles: Urge Surfing to beat addictions and cravings

We all face the same wall at some stage...we can do what we've always done - which we know leads nowhere...or we can put our faith in trying something new...

D

northland

I just read the first 2 paragraphs, and it sounds interesting already.

northland

I know I have a huge desire to stop drinking. It seems that each time I relapse, I learn something new. I have began to identify what really pushes me to the point of drinking, and a lot of the stuff I have learned has come from this site. I feel confident that one day things will stick, because my desire to stop drinking is growing each day, even if I have setbacks (relapses) . Honestly, the past handful of relapses have actually helped me, now that I really think about it. I'm a beginner at living a sober life, and it is hard to give up on what I know best (drinking).

northland

okay I read the article on surfing. This is all stuff I am aware of, and am usually aware of during the early times in sobriety (less than 2 weeks). But after x amount of time, I feel really good, and when the cravings come on say day 15, it's like I am a robot and my thoughts just lead me to drinking. The drinking voice takes over, and no other voice even speaks to me, and I go drink. Does that make sense? That is where I always stumble. Right now my drinking voice is very quiet, it knows it can't get past the I'm staying sober voice. But the voice to drink always comes at the right moment, I'm usually doing something fun, having a good time, and I think it would be more enjoyable if I got drunk, to make it more exciting.

sleepie

That's cool, thanks for the link Dee.

Dee74

I had lots of those robot moments too.

I think the way around them is lots of work - whether it's posting and reading here regularly and picking up the tips, or going to AA or counselling or whatever.

It's work done in the time when we're in that good frame of mind, so that when the addict voice reappears we can be ready for it and not give in to it next time.

I drank all day every day for 7 years or so. You better believe it was tough sometimes not to go out and buy something, or refuse a drink, or buy something and have the strength to throw it away before I got home....

But I did it because I knew the way I'd came had no answers. I was that beaten down I was willing to try another way, even if it was hard to stick to it for a while.

I really wanted a different life.
You guys can do it too - I know it

D