First night sober in many months...
First night sober in many months...
Even if I went out at night and did something that didn't involve drinking, I'd come home and drink hard for a couple of hours so I could pass out instead of going to sleep like a normal person. More recently I'd be ready with a bottle tucked under the seat so I could drink on the drive home instead of waiting...stupid, stupid, stupid.
First night sober in months, first night sober in the house I bought a few months ago, it feels very strange. I've been trying to work but obsessively reading old threads on these forums. I really appreciate the supportiveness and no ******** approach you regulars have.
My shoulders are up around my ears I'm so tense and twitchy. I've had about two gallons of soup (cup after cup after cup) and ate all the nutri-grain bars in the house and I'm smoking like a fiend...I guess I am replacing the constant sips of alcohol with food...I remember from past quits having real sugar cravings. I'm scared to go to the store and buy more sweet things because they sell alcohol there...I am NOT feeling real strong about this at the moment! My mouth is literally watering thinking about drinking...ugh.
Even though my past periods of sobriety didn't last, I do remember this: It felt SO good when the cravings subsided and I didn't HAVE to drink. I want to feel like that again. I cannot express how I admire all of you who have stayed strong in your sobriety, be it for days, weeks, months or years. Damn it's difficult.
Off to run a hot bubble bath.
First night sober in months, first night sober in the house I bought a few months ago, it feels very strange. I've been trying to work but obsessively reading old threads on these forums. I really appreciate the supportiveness and no ******** approach you regulars have.
My shoulders are up around my ears I'm so tense and twitchy. I've had about two gallons of soup (cup after cup after cup) and ate all the nutri-grain bars in the house and I'm smoking like a fiend...I guess I am replacing the constant sips of alcohol with food...I remember from past quits having real sugar cravings. I'm scared to go to the store and buy more sweet things because they sell alcohol there...I am NOT feeling real strong about this at the moment! My mouth is literally watering thinking about drinking...ugh.
Even though my past periods of sobriety didn't last, I do remember this: It felt SO good when the cravings subsided and I didn't HAVE to drink. I want to feel like that again. I cannot express how I admire all of you who have stayed strong in your sobriety, be it for days, weeks, months or years. Damn it's difficult.
Off to run a hot bubble bath.
My favorite way to relax is walking my dogs... unless it's the middle of the night.
Good for you for giving up alcohol. It's no good for us alkies and will only do terrible damage if we don't stop.
Read our stories and ask your questions. Yes, it is rough the first week or so, but it does get better. And living sober really rocks!
Good for you for giving up alcohol. It's no good for us alkies and will only do terrible damage if we don't stop.
Read our stories and ask your questions. Yes, it is rough the first week or so, but it does get better. And living sober really rocks!
Thanks all - Zebra, I've had a whole lot of "first sober nights" too, which isn't actually very encouraging! But what to do but persevere, I guess.
Least, I've walked my dogs in the wee hours many times...I have three plus a foster dog here, I swear my dogs are the only reason I get up in the morning sometimes...
The bath was great, I'm really tired but still feel like I am jumping out of my skin and now I'm eating celery sticks dipped in peanut butter. I'm pretty skinny but that won't last if I don't keep stuffing food in my face.
Today a friend who I've been ignoring (I've been ignoring most people in my life for the last couple of weeks) sent her husband and son by here to see if I was OK, about 4 pm. Good thing I wasn't drunk, at least I was sober....he told me they'd stopped by two nights ago at 8 pm and I was clearly home, but apparently passed out drunk and even the dogs barking didn't wake my drunken ass. I made some dumb excuse like I must have been in the shower but he probably saw right through that one.
Least, I've walked my dogs in the wee hours many times...I have three plus a foster dog here, I swear my dogs are the only reason I get up in the morning sometimes...
The bath was great, I'm really tired but still feel like I am jumping out of my skin and now I'm eating celery sticks dipped in peanut butter. I'm pretty skinny but that won't last if I don't keep stuffing food in my face.
Today a friend who I've been ignoring (I've been ignoring most people in my life for the last couple of weeks) sent her husband and son by here to see if I was OK, about 4 pm. Good thing I wasn't drunk, at least I was sober....he told me they'd stopped by two nights ago at 8 pm and I was clearly home, but apparently passed out drunk and even the dogs barking didn't wake my drunken ass. I made some dumb excuse like I must have been in the shower but he probably saw right through that one.
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