Ways to get sober
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Toronto, On
Posts: 11
Ways to get sober
I was just wondering if there are others out there who have not attended AA and have found other ways to stay sober? The purpose of this post is not to put down AA but to know if there are other ideas for sobriety.
Thanks for sharing this with me. My experience is I have attended AA many times but did not feel it was the right place for me.Wondering if there are others like me and what do you do?
I have been sober since Jan for 75 days now and going strong. I would like to keep up this momentum. I don't care to go back to that dark place I frequented for so many years. If I don't go to a meeting will I be headed in that direction eventually?
Thanks for sharing this with me. My experience is I have attended AA many times but did not feel it was the right place for me.Wondering if there are others like me and what do you do?
I have been sober since Jan for 75 days now and going strong. I would like to keep up this momentum. I don't care to go back to that dark place I frequented for so many years. If I don't go to a meeting will I be headed in that direction eventually?
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,512
Hi,
There are many of us here who recover without using AA.
For me, I spent the first two years of recovery on my own, and then I found SR and have been here ever since. There is always inspiration here.
I work on my recovery every single day. Balance is the crucial issue in my life and so that means physically, spiritually and mentally to help my recovery every day.
There are many of us here who recover without using AA.
For me, I spent the first two years of recovery on my own, and then I found SR and have been here ever since. There is always inspiration here.
I work on my recovery every single day. Balance is the crucial issue in my life and so that means physically, spiritually and mentally to help my recovery every day.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,784
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: NJ
Posts: 20,458
i did not know I wanted to seriously stop drinking until I started reading the forums and posted here....that was on February 16...I stopped and found tremendous support and guidance from SR...it is working for me.
other options may be viable later, but for now, I am happy with my 30 days progress, I am happier with myself...and I like being sober...Who knew??? my only regret is that I didn't try it sooner.
other options may be viable later, but for now, I am happy with my 30 days progress, I am happier with myself...and I like being sober...Who knew??? my only regret is that I didn't try it sooner.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 4,682
IMO the principle is still the same, find someone who has long term sobriety and then do what they did...but you have to find out WHAT they changed and how they did it to be able to emulate their success. AA is not the only way to get sober...i only went there because i had tried everything else and had nowhere left to go:-)
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,444
Hi SEC
There are successful members here who did not use AA, including me.
From my own experience, I wouldn't rule anything out as not useful tho - 75 days is still just the start of the journey...I know I've come to find a lot of value in things I initially didn't like at all.
I posted this recently about my journey:
D
There are successful members here who did not use AA, including me.
From my own experience, I wouldn't rule anything out as not useful tho - 75 days is still just the start of the journey...I know I've come to find a lot of value in things I initially didn't like at all.
I posted this recently about my journey:
I think most folks know my story.
The turning point for me was acceptance - acceptance that I was an alcoholic - and the acceptance that I could not drink 'like everyone else'.
So I stopped drinking. I did everything I could to maintain that commitment. I still do, nearly 3 years on - every day.
I nearly died, so fear played a large part in that - I also spent a lot of time here@ SR reaching out, and a lot of time tossing and turning, kicking the walls and deliberately not going out when all I wanted was to run down the road and get a bottle.
It's not easy but I believe it is possible to do that and not give in to the inner voice. The folks here helped me immensely by giving me faith in myself when I had none.
But yeah, not drinking only got me so far. I see not drinking as only the first step in a long journey. I had to change the person I was too.
My alcoholism *became* all pervasive but I believe I *started* to drink for definite reasons - mostly to fill a void within myself.
To heal my 'void', the first step is to stop poisoning myself with drink. I then had to get into what the void was, and how best I could start healing it.
It was a paradox for me to discover that the way towards that was not by thinking more about it, but actually thinking less, and doing more.
I did a lot of service work here, and still do because it helps me to be of service and to give back after many years of taking. It also helps keep me grounded and in perspective.
I also rediscovered my spiritual side - my initial recovery was secular - just don't drink...but it's hard to ignore the wonder in this world when you really start to recover.
It's hard for me to drink when I'm connected to the world in a more than a material way, and when I'm humble and grateful for the blessings I get everyday.
You know I could go on, but that's enough really LOL.
I'm not looking to start a school - I hope my experience helps others but I'm just a guy who found what he needed because he really wanted to quit and he looked hard enough for the way that worked for him.
I encourage everyone to do that. Start the process right away tho - don't wait for 'your way' to fall into your lap - you'll only find 'your way' by going out looking for it, trying a bunch of stuff - and not drinking.
I learned from every single step on my journey - successes and mistakes, friends and foe alike.
But I always kept walking forwards, not backwards
The turning point for me was acceptance - acceptance that I was an alcoholic - and the acceptance that I could not drink 'like everyone else'.
So I stopped drinking. I did everything I could to maintain that commitment. I still do, nearly 3 years on - every day.
I nearly died, so fear played a large part in that - I also spent a lot of time here@ SR reaching out, and a lot of time tossing and turning, kicking the walls and deliberately not going out when all I wanted was to run down the road and get a bottle.
It's not easy but I believe it is possible to do that and not give in to the inner voice. The folks here helped me immensely by giving me faith in myself when I had none.
But yeah, not drinking only got me so far. I see not drinking as only the first step in a long journey. I had to change the person I was too.
My alcoholism *became* all pervasive but I believe I *started* to drink for definite reasons - mostly to fill a void within myself.
To heal my 'void', the first step is to stop poisoning myself with drink. I then had to get into what the void was, and how best I could start healing it.
It was a paradox for me to discover that the way towards that was not by thinking more about it, but actually thinking less, and doing more.
I did a lot of service work here, and still do because it helps me to be of service and to give back after many years of taking. It also helps keep me grounded and in perspective.
I also rediscovered my spiritual side - my initial recovery was secular - just don't drink...but it's hard to ignore the wonder in this world when you really start to recover.
It's hard for me to drink when I'm connected to the world in a more than a material way, and when I'm humble and grateful for the blessings I get everyday.
You know I could go on, but that's enough really LOL.
I'm not looking to start a school - I hope my experience helps others but I'm just a guy who found what he needed because he really wanted to quit and he looked hard enough for the way that worked for him.
I encourage everyone to do that. Start the process right away tho - don't wait for 'your way' to fall into your lap - you'll only find 'your way' by going out looking for it, trying a bunch of stuff - and not drinking.
I learned from every single step on my journey - successes and mistakes, friends and foe alike.
But I always kept walking forwards, not backwards
Heathen
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: La La Land, USA
Posts: 2,567
Count me in as a person who doesn't use AA 
I did find that I needed support though, so I come here often, got a bunch of individual therapy.. and ditched my toxic friends.
So far so good, since 8/08!
I did find that I needed support though, so I come here often, got a bunch of individual therapy.. and ditched my toxic friends.
So far so good, since 8/08!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Ontario
Posts: 806
Originally Posted by SEC09 
I was just wondering if there are others out there who have not attended AA and have found other ways to stay sober? The purpose of this post is not to put down AA but to know if there are other ideas for sobriety.
Thanks for sharing this with me. My experience is I have attended AA many times but did not feel it was the right place for me.Wondering if there are others like me and what do you do?
I have been sober since Jan for 75 days now and going strong. I would like to keep up this momentum. I don't care to go back to that dark place I frequented for so many years. If I don't go to a meeting will I be headed in that direction eventually?
Thanks for sharing this with me. My experience is I have attended AA many times but did not feel it was the right place for me.Wondering if there are others like me and what do you do?
I have been sober since Jan for 75 days now and going strong. I would like to keep up this momentum. I don't care to go back to that dark place I frequented for so many years. If I don't go to a meeting will I be headed in that direction eventually?
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
If I don't go to a meeting will I be headed in that direction eventually?
Balance is the crucial issue in my life and so that means physically, spiritually and mentally to help my recovery every day.
One thing I have seen in common both in & outside of AA is that those with long term sobriety have developed a solid balance of the physical, mental & spiritual life.
What I needed that I found in AA was a book with a path spelled out that leads one to a balanced way of living life with a proven track record along with a group of people who had followed that path & are living the principles that were more then willing to lead & support me as I followed the same path.
I could never have found that balance of the physical/mental/spiritual needs to stay happily sober.
Seek your own path, stay honest with yourself, be open minded & willing to do what ever it takes to stay sober and find balance, some can find this balance without AA & others can't. Keep in mind, no matter what, if you can not find your own path as others have that the doors of AA are open to any one.
The founders of AA were well aware there were others paths to sobriety other then AA & they supported those paths, they just have shared with others what worked for them & what has worked for myself & millions of others.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Toronto, On
Posts: 11
Thanks for the feedback. I am pretty certain what I need to do right now. I am going to continue to follow this path I am leading where I am letting myself find my way as I go along. This seems to be working quite well as I am able for the first time in my life listening to my inner voice that has been there all along trying to guide me but I did not want to listen. I have experienced so many ups and downs this week and instead of finding the nearest beer store and sitting in a park chugging several king cans I have chosen to sit with myself and give myself support to get through them. I have been coming on here, reading my meditation book, spending more time with my family instead of isolating myself, being real with people about my alcoholism and what I need in order to maintain my sobriety. In the past I was more concerned about pleasing everyone at any cost. I ask for what I need now and let God take care of the rest whoever that may be!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 148
Originally Posted by Anna
...I work on my recovery every single day. Balance is the crucial issue in my life and so that means physically, spiritually and mentally to help my recovery every day.
I still go to meetings on occasion, still go to the clubs, dances, dinners, events, sports leagues, etc. Keeps me around sober friends and other sober people who are leading good lives these days...not all of them are doing AA.
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