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Old 02-18-2010, 10:25 AM
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Gotta Vent

Well everyone I fell again, every time I go out of town on business I end up drinking. I guess because there is no accountability. I really screwed up this time, I didn't show for a meeting this morning because I was sick from being hung over. God I am so pathetic, I probably ruined my reputation. I am seriously thinking of calling the employee assistance counselors through my work and getting some help. I am a classic person who never thought that he was an alcoholic because I only go out once and awhile, but when I do, I get in trouble. call of work and all kinds of terrible stuff.

God forgive me for falling down again, please change me because I cannot change myself.
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Old 02-18-2010, 10:32 AM
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You're not pathetic. You're just sick. Everyone's road is different. Keep trying.
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Old 02-18-2010, 10:34 AM
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The employee assistance program might be a wonderful way to start your sobriety again. Please do call them and see about detox/rehab as soon as possible. Alcoholism never gets better on its own, it only gets worse.
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Old 02-18-2010, 10:39 AM
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That might be the way to go, Hockeyplayer.

You need to do whatever it takes.

And, please remember, addiction is not a character defect, it's a disease.
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Old 02-18-2010, 10:47 AM
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Hey Hockey. Give yourself a break, and don't worry about your reputation with the folks at the meeting. We don't shoot our wounded. You will always be welcomed back.

Keep in mind, you can find a meeting ANYWHERE. Just because you are travelling, you aren't taking a vacation from your alcoholism. I know a fellow who also has to travel for business. He had the same 'no accountability' issue. He found that though he has no accountability to anyone when he travels, he does have accountability to himself. Maybe make a commitment to yourself to find a meeting to where ever it is that you are traveling to.

Beating yourself up is not living in the solution. It is prolonging the problem. Get to a meeting and hang in there. Life is beautiful today.
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Old 02-18-2010, 12:06 PM
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Hi Hockeyplayer,

You know what to do - don't just consider phoning them, just do it. You are not going to regret asking for help.

If you don't, it will just get worse and you will more meetings and your reputation will suffer more.
Take care
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Old 02-18-2010, 01:48 PM
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I have to throw this out there..........

You can ask God to help you but you'll have to do some leg work. I'm with the others, I would definitely talk to your work counselors. Good luck to you!!
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Old 02-18-2010, 01:55 PM
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I agree with the others - don't seriously consider it, do it - ring EAP.
As for God - He can move mountains - but I firmly believe He gives us the shovel....

Make the call, Hockey
D
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Old 02-18-2010, 02:05 PM
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I don't know what kind of accountability you have
at home. If you are doing the AA program....
you can usually find meetings when you travel
You can also stay in contact via phone

Many of us started over before we found recovery.
This can be your last bout with drinking
and I sure hope it will be....
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Old 02-18-2010, 03:27 PM
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Yep! Just like nike, just do it...

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Old 02-18-2010, 07:19 PM
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Thank you

Thanks for all of your advice and kind words. I am calling EAP tomorrow.

Thanks for helping.
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