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30 days Sober and just joining you.

Old 02-15-2010, 03:51 PM
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30 days Sober and just joining you.

Hello. I joined you folks formally this day. I happened upon you in my online search for answers about alcohol withdrawal, recovery, and other alcohol cessation/sobriety related questions. Most of the time when I would Google a question this site would come up, giving me help and advice, and HOPE....and I just kept coming back. Finally today, having reached 30 days sober, I decided to take a leap and join up. I've never been on any online forums/chat rooms, before. So that I joined is a confirmation that I am finally being serious with myself about my problem. I am glad that I am able to join you all who have helped me throughout the month. I thank you for being there for me, even though you did not know me, or know that I was "lurking". And I look forward to sharing, and to receiving help and insights, and to hopefully giving helpful input.

I woke up exactly 4 weeks ago today....and it was not pretty. I had strange shooting pains in my head, I could not think straight to write up my technical reports for work, and my hands were starting to feel like I was losing my fine motor coordination in them. I would say for probably a couple of weeks this had been happening. Well this day that I woke up on January 25th, I got scared out of my mind. I felt like I was killing myself....a nice slow rediculous death. And I decided that I wanted to live.

I have wrestled with drinking a lot on and off for years. Many many years. About 35 years.

This last stint of about 2.5 years of drinking every night started when I had a lot of losses to deal with. My Dad died, my dear friend comitted suicide, my mom died, and my dear hound-dog died (mom and my dog within 2 months of each other..and the rest all pretty close together.) It was rough, everytime I turned around another one that I loved with all of my heart left, and I was thrown for very painful loop. The self medicating got way out of hand though and was killing me. Literally. I want to live. And I am ready to deal with the rest of the pain without alcohol. And I need help.

Someone, somewhere on this forum wrote that she is "leaning with all of her might into the future". And I have really hung onto that as a sort of mantra for myself. So thank you for whoever wrote that.

I am looking forward to clarity and learning how to stay on this road.

Thank you. I look forward to interacting with you. I am very glad you are there. I am very glad I am here.
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Old 02-15-2010, 03:52 PM
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Welcome, and congrats on your first month of recovery!

Stick around, don't wander off, there's much to be learned and shared with our members.
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Old 02-15-2010, 03:58 PM
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Welcome houndheart
You'll find a lot of help here

D
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Old 02-15-2010, 04:00 PM
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Thanks. I just realized...It's 4 weeks...not 30 days. Been kinda spacey lately. Head hasn't quite cleared yet I guess....
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Old 02-15-2010, 04:01 PM
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bona fido dog-lover
 
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Welcome to SR! We're here to offer support and information to help in your recovery. Congrats on your sober month! Feels better waking up these days;, doesn't it?

I'm glad you found us and joined the family.
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Old 02-15-2010, 04:02 PM
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You'll make it another two days, and many more if you have the desire. One day at a time.
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Old 02-15-2010, 04:03 PM
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Hi and Welcome,

I'm glad you found us online and decided to join. This was the first online forum I ever joined too, and I've been here for years now. It's a great place!
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Old 02-15-2010, 04:17 PM
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Yes, no hangover is a novel...and very welcome. I am exhausted all the time though...and I hear that this passes eventually...that would be nice. My memory's challenging me too. Not sure if it's the drinking or the "changes of life" due to my age...or both, but it's a real trip and a half at the moment!
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Old 02-15-2010, 04:21 PM
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Welcome! I must say that I would not have made it as long as I have without the advice and support that I have received here. It's a wonderful place!

Congratulations on your 1 month sober, give or take a couple of days
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Old 02-15-2010, 04:28 PM
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Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
 
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I'm sorry you lost so many loved ones ....
Living in health is a good way to honor their memory.

Welcome to our recovery community
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Old 02-15-2010, 04:34 PM
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Yes, my Dad died on Valentine's Day. I felt that was a pretty bad joke, but yesterday I decided to think, what better day to leave, than on a day that reminds me of how much love we had for each other? His loss was the furthest away, so I am getting through more stages with his. The other ones seemed to happen at once...

I think that going through the rest of the stages sober would be a good thing.
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Old 02-15-2010, 05:39 PM
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Old 02-15-2010, 06:21 PM
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Welcome to SR!
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