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Perhaps This Will Help You If You Are Hurting...

Old 01-14-2010, 09:56 AM
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Exclamation Perhaps This Will Help You If You Are Hurting...

Please read my ENTIRE post as I need your opinion on something I REALLY believe can help you a GREAT DEAL!

My name is Rob and I am new here. A few of you have been very kind and I thank you for that! Below is a new part of my recipe to get and stay clean that I think can benefit all of you if you read it and understand my intention.

If you are struggling, please let me know if this sounds good to you...

THE PAIN OF QUITTING. Primarily the first few days, weeks, months of separating ourselves from our addictions that are destroying us.

HOW DO WE GET THROUGH THIS MISERY?

As some of you know, I am a FIRM believer in PERCEPTION and HOW we see things.

The decision to quit is usually because of a VERY painful event or finally hitting "rock bottom"
THEN, we then connect massive pain WITH using. SO...We decide to quit. FOR NOW

Then what?
TIME PASSES -- RELAPSE AGAIN!
But WHY?


BECAUSE WE NO LONGER ATTACH THAT PAIN. It fades. We crash. We relapse....again.

We ALL are quitting for the same reason(s) to enjoy a life FREE of alcohol and drugs and the HEAVEN that goes with NOT being a SLAVE to addiction.

Right? Well, here is the problem we all face...

When the PAIN of quitting and withdrawal outweighs the PLEASURE of getting to our new and sober life we relapse, RIGHT?

WE MUST ATTACH CONSTANT HAPPINESS AND NON STOP PLEASURE TO QUITTING EVEN WHEN IN THE WORST POSSIBLE PAIN & WITHDRAWAL! [/CENTER]

The question I had was the problem most of us face...

"How the hell can I get happy or motivated when I feel this way? How can I mix the misery of withdrawal with happiness or motivation to get to my new life"


HOW???


SHOW YOUR MIND WHAT IS WAITING!


LITERALLY, SHOW YOUR SELF. Let your mind SEE the rewards of the pain and misery that LEAD to a GREAT new Life! Create a large picture / wall / montage of EVERYTHING and I mean EVERYTHING you are striving for with quitting drugs or alcohol. ALL of the GREAT things waiting for you with your new and sober life on the other end of this bridge of pain we have to cross.

Put pictures of you at your HAPPIEST when you were sober! Put pictures of your new car you will soon afford with money you WOULD have given your dealer. Put pictures of your children or family that perhaps you lost and will get back when you are sober. Put pictures of a HEALTHY you with a body FAR better then you have now. Put pictures of your ideal mate that you can now go out and fall in love with since you are no longer a drug addict or alcoholic! USE LARGE DETAILED photos to SHOW your brain what is waiting!!!

EVERYTHING that you are going for with your new and sober life put a VISUAL image on a wall so you SEE IT as REALITY.

AN ENTIRE WALL.

The bigger the better. The more cluttered the better!

Make it the FIRST thing you see in the morning and the last thing you see at night! You fed your brain poisons for years now feed it what it NEEDS. The REWARDS of your pain. Your TEMPORARY pain that will lead you to this new life that you now SEE and can feel as you look at your "Rapidly Approaching Life" wall.

The RAL (my initials!)


IN WITHDRAWL?


Curl up right in front of your "Rapidly Approaching Life" wall filled with images of the NEW and HAPPY YOU that WILL BE once you deal with this TEMPORARY pain that is keeping you from all of these rewards.

As we all know our minds can turn on us! They can trick us into relapse right? LETS TRICK OUR MINDS INTO RECOVERY AND HAPPINESS!!!

I have told you all I am working on new and dynamic ways of recovery that involve PERCEPTION. My doctor acted like I reinvented the wheel and started writing down what I just told you guys.

If we SEE the fantastic lives we are all striving for when we wake and all day long, we will have a much easier time staying on the road TO that very life of happiness and sobriety. This may sound strange to some of you but I believe we need new ways to get better and THIS is one.

When I was a bodybuilder I would use pictures (as many people do for inspiration) to look at WHILE I was training. Why then?

THATS WHEN I PUSHED THROUGH THE PAIN!

because...


I WANTED THAT!!! It didn't matter that I felt this little pain from the work out. (pain? what pain? All I see in my mind is that NEW ME and how GOOD it feels to look this way) Understand my point? If you have a FOCUS point when you are in this pain the process is MUCH MUCH better.

You cannot feel pain and pleasure at the same time! INFUSE YOUR BRAIN WITH PLEASURE WITH THE RAL (Rapidly Approaching Life) Wall filled with words and images of your NEW life that WILL happen!

Like it? My doctor did and I hope you do to.


Please let me know what you think? I want this method to help everyone in need. Lets SHOW our minds what is waiting for us on the other end of this bridge of pain we are all crossing or trying to cross OK. When we SEE the other side of the bridge, it sure is better then waiting and hoping the crossing will be over soon!

Our minds have a mind of their own as we all know! Lets do to our minds what our minds have been doing to us but for the GOOD. I have a LOT more to add but I want to get some feedback first. This is just HALF of my new idea and will share the rest with those of you who are interested. I am starting to sound like an infomercial "BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE! IF YOU ORDER BLAH BLAH" Just kidding guys. I hope you guys have a great day and I REALLY hope you can see the amount of energy this method of recovery has.

What do you guys think?

Give me your real opinions of the RAL wall. THANKS for the half hour it took to read this!! Rob
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Old 01-14-2010, 10:12 AM
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It sounds a little bit like "Tony Robbins (Neuro Linguistic Programming)" meets "The Secret (The Law Of Attraction: just visualize it and it will happen)", but I would like to hear more. The only problem for me is I have guests over and a great big wall of chopped up photos would make me look psycho as I have no real private place to put a large wall photo. But maybe I could do a smaller one that I could put away.

I guess at this point I'm open to anything that might help. :day6 Especially if it's free and this isn't some kind of marketing plan.
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Old 01-14-2010, 10:12 AM
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Rob this sounds great, visualisation is indeed a powerful tool.

This is me, i drank for 20 years from the age roughly of 18...i was pretty 'crazy' before i started drinking and had already lost the plot a little without alcohol. 20 years later of trying to control my drinking, the yoyo life of up and down, the mess i made of my life and everyone that came into it etcetc how insane do you think i was when i finally put the bottle down or had periods of not drinking throughout the years? Lost the plot i didn't knoww what the plot was to try and find it! How on earth was i supposed to visualise all the good things that happened in sobriety when i couldn't remember a good day for about the last 8 years of my drinking...seriously?! Dont get me wrong i've never been to prison, hospitalised or arrested for drinking...held down a healthy 6 figure a year job etc but as insane as they come!

That coupled with the fact that i didn't know my ass from my elbow and wouldn't have trusted myself to go and buy a loaf of bread at the end...this wouldn't have worked for me.

However this is something i would have tried along with the dozen other things that i tried over the years to avoid taking a good look at myself...

I hope it does work for someone though and you, i'm not dissing your post just giving my experience and thoughts:-)
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Old 01-14-2010, 10:21 AM
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Originally Posted by sunset2000 View Post
It sounds a little bit like "Tony Robbins (Neuro Linguistic Programming)" meets "The Secret (The Law Of Attraction: just visualize it and it will happen)", but I would like to hear more. The only problem for me is I have guests over and a great big wall of chopped up photos would make me look psycho as I have no real private place to put a large wall photo. But maybe I could do a smaller one that I could put away.

I guess at this point I'm open to anything that might help. :day6 Especially if it's free and this isn't some kind of marketing plan.
My friend, this is something for your bedroom and I would hope your recovery is more important then your guests opinion of your decor. Im sure you know what I mean. And no, I am not saying "just visualize it and it will happen" I am saying SEE it so you can stay inspired. It is not a marketing plan or scam. Awe never mind here...lol LOL
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Old 01-14-2010, 10:27 AM
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Originally Posted by sunset2000 View Post
The only problem for me is I have guests over and a great big wall of chopped up photos would make me look psycho
Make you look psycho? Tony Robbins? Marketing scam?

Man. I must be in the wrong place to try and contribute to recovery.

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Old 01-14-2010, 10:28 AM
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Hi Rob

Anything which gets someone to recover from addiction/alcoholism and save their lives should be applauded.

You seem passionate about your solution and I truly hope it works for you.

There is a big difference between getting sober/clean and staying sober/clean.

I had many years in recovery and it was good recovery and then I relapsed an ended up in hell and a far worse hell than before, even though I could never imagine it could get worse.

Us addicts/alcoholics are genius at working out ways to get clean/sober. Usually all of them fail.

I wish you well. Keep in touch.
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Old 01-14-2010, 10:31 AM
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Thank you for the kind reply. Was refreshing my friend.
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Old 01-14-2010, 10:44 AM
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Hi Rob,

Someone said on here the other day that the posts which made him the most angry were the ones which he needed to hear the most.

Something to think about......

I think all the responses you have had have been kind. Some responses may be blunt but we have learned in addiction/alcoholism that we are blind to the truth, even when it is staring us in the face. Part of helping others is to help them see the truth.

Everyone here cares about you getting better, remember that. Equally we all understand where you are coming from because we have been there.

There's something to be said for "take what you need and leave the rest". It's helpful advice although experience tells me that people usually end up coming back for the rest.

Keep us posted on your progress. Our common purpose here is to get clean and sober.
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Old 01-14-2010, 10:49 AM
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So I need to hear my idea that I wanted to simply help others is "a Tony Robins marketing scam?" Im pretty sure I am in the wrong place. Sorry to offend anyone.
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Old 01-14-2010, 10:52 AM
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Rob, I think Sunset was just kidding and frankly I laughed at the chopped up photo thing. I like your ideas! Visualization is a powerful tool and used with people with many medical problems or in yoga for relaxation. When I was reading your post I was imagining my wall.......getting a degree, financially sound, happy, fit, etc........

Some diets even suggest putting pics on your fridge of what you would like to look like. Another example might be some students........you can try to lecture them till you are blue in the face.......they don't get it. But give them a picture or video or just hands on and it snaps in.

Your ideas are positive and healthy.
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Old 01-14-2010, 10:55 AM
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I simply am trying to bring new approaches to this thing we call addiction. Its clear the failure rate of most conventional methods is through the roof. I am truly sorry if trying to use new approaches (or new to me before I hear how it has been done before) in a sincere attempt to help others and that is it. I have found that a great many members simply MUST say SOMETHING helpful or not.
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Old 01-14-2010, 10:57 AM
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Originally Posted by RobAllen View Post
So I need to hear my idea that I wanted to simply help others is "a Tony Robins marketing scam?" Im pretty sure I am in the wrong place. Sorry to offend anyone.

That post said they would like to hear more about your plan...and wondered how it would fit into their life.

As I said before, we all care about you getting and staying clean. Take care.
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Old 01-14-2010, 10:57 AM
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Originally Posted by ViciousCycle View Post
Rob, I think Sunset was just kidding and frankly I laughed at the chopped up photo thing. I like your ideas! Visualization is a powerful tool and used with people with many medical problems or in yoga for relaxation. When I was reading your post I was imagining my wall.......getting a degree, financially sound, happy, fit, etc........

Some diets even suggest putting pics on your fridge of what you would like to look like. Another example might be some students........you can try to lecture them till you are blue in the face.......they don't get it. But give them a picture or video or just hands on and it snaps in.

Your ideas are positive and healthy.
LOL! Thank you. I think I have been up for too long my friend. I appreciate it and I know she was joking for the most part. I think. Wait, what day is it....?

zzzzzzzzzz
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Old 01-14-2010, 10:58 AM
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Originally Posted by intention View Post
That post said they would like to hear more about your plan...and wondered how it would fit into their life.

As I said before, we all care about you getting and staying clean. Take care.
Thank you for that Intention
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Old 01-14-2010, 11:04 AM
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What did I miss? Confused.
Anyway, I saw on Oprah one day about putting everything you want in your life on a piece of paper where you can see it often. About 4 months ago I put "Calm, Sobriety, Wonderful children, Friend Time, Savings". I look at it often and think about it often.
So far I have 4 out of 5 and might be making more money soon for the savings.
Can't hurt to try right?
I would plaster my whole wall. I wouldn't care. Come to my house? See a bit of my soul. ;D
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Old 01-14-2010, 11:09 AM
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Originally Posted by soberinwpg View Post
What did I miss? Confused.
Anyway, I saw on Oprah one day about putting everything you want in your life on a piece of paper where you can see it often. About 4 months ago I put "Calm, Sobriety, Wonderful children, Friend Time, Savings". I look at it often and think about it often.
So far I have 4 out of 5 and might be making more money soon for the savings.
Can't hurt to try right?
I would plaster my whole wall. I wouldn't care. Come to my house? See a bit of my soul. ;D
THANK YOU! See, Oprah said it too! LOL I guess it isnt so psycho. I was starting to think my fantastic idea wasnt so fantastic! LOL JK
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Old 01-14-2010, 11:35 AM
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Smile

Wow, I wasn't expecting such a harsh reaction to my thoughts, which I thought we were asked to give. Perhaps I could have been more succinct.

Anyway, I'm not speaking for anyone but myself, Rob. I work from home and I have production meetings and editing clients over every week. For me, it's just not professional to have something so intimate and personal in my work space. Nor would I particularly want to have to explain it to clients if I did. That's just me.

On a personal note, I am a single gal hoping to date again soon, and sorry if it's true but a huge montage of chopped up random images in my bedroom wouldn't be easy to explain either! LOL I like to reveal my soul a little more slowly than that, soberinwpg! :-)

I also suggested that for me personally, perhaps a smaller montage that I could put away would work best for me and I said I was interested and wanted to hear more.

I also did not use the word "scam". I am a big fan of both Robbins and the Secret, so that comparison was not meant as a negative. Just that it's been done before. Perhaps not directed towards addicts per se, but that's what might be interesting about your program.

As I also said, I am open to anything at this point that might help. However, I would simply like to know if the program you're referring to costs money? If it's free and not part of some bigger marketing plan, then that would be good to know as well. And if there are fees involved it would just be helpful to know how much.

I think visualization is a great tool, but without action and commitment, it's not quite as effective. And from what I'm hearing, addicts (like myself) have a lot of work to do. Just my thoughts.

P.S. As a struggling filmmaker I am always looking for inspiration.
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Old 01-14-2010, 12:40 PM
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On a personal note, I am a single gal hoping to date again soon, and sorry if it's true but a huge montage of chopped up random images in my bedroom wouldn't be easy to explain either! LOL I like to reveal my soul a little more slowly than that, soberinwpg! :-)

Hmm? You got me thinking. I don't have the greatest history in relationships. You might have something in this "revealing your soul more slowly". lol. Thanks.

Sorry to hiijack. Carry on...............
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Old 01-14-2010, 01:43 PM
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I can see how this may help a percentage of the population but I would be concerned as to what would happen when some of these people are not getting the things that are on their wall.
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Old 01-14-2010, 02:02 PM
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Thanks for the ideas Rob. I think anything that keeps you focused is good.
What else are you planning to do?

D
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