My Story

Old 01-02-2010, 08:17 PM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Ashevill, NC
Posts: 3
My Story

Hello. I'm 37 and have been drinking heavily for the last 10 years. I am starting to experience health issues from my drinking, and decided to quit (I had a "good" physical 4 months ago, but I know it's just a matter of time). I have been trying to quit for the last two months, and haven't been able to go more than two days without drinking....and on that 3rd day I really overdue it. I was diagnosed with social anxiety disorder years ago, which I think triggered the start of my drinking pattern. Alcohol has been my best, and sometimes only friend for the last 10 years. Not being a social person, I have been reluctant to try AA. Actually, I'm scared to death to even make that first call.

Any advice? How did others make that first step in asking for help. I don't think I can do this on my own. I want a drink so bad right now, but I know what I will feel like tomorrow (the same as I did this morning).

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Old 01-02-2010, 08:21 PM
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We Do Recover
ANGELINA243's Avatar
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Texas
Posts: 2,619
Welcome! Glad you are here. You are taking a huge step forward by posting here. Asking for help can be scary at first. Just remember that you are not alone. Help is possible. We do recover.
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Old 01-02-2010, 08:26 PM
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same planet...different world
barb dwyer's Avatar
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Butte, America
Posts: 10,946
Hi, Walt!


I hope you'll visit the Alcoholism forums,
and read the stickies at the top of the forum there.

There's one in particular,
"Under the Influence' that you might want to take a look at.

Keep posting, and again welcome!

You're not alone.
Most of us on SR
couldn't get sober on our own.

And now you're not alone, either!
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Old 01-02-2010, 08:28 PM
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Not all better, getting better
tyler's Avatar
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: The Beautiful Inner Banks of NC
Posts: 1,702
Walking through that door the first time is probably one of the toughest things about AA, it is a combination of fear of the unknown and fear of losing your crutch, alcohol. Many folks find a great deal of help from AA, and it is a great starting point for your recovery. You can easily find meetings, the people there are super nice, especially to the newcommers, and it can provide a great structure for getting better.

There are other options out there, but AA is by far the most accessable. I'm not a social person either, and it was really hard to walk though that door the first time, but I did gain a lot from the people and the program. Though I don't consider myself a 12step "member", I have gained a great deal of insight into myself and my problems.

I'm sure there will be plenty of folks along soon (if the haven't already arived while I am writing!!) to share their experiences and wisdom. The most important thing is to never give up. Just by being here you will learn a lot about yourself and your addiction. This is a great first step for you. I wish you well on your journey and welcome you to our community. Take care.
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Old 01-02-2010, 09:02 PM
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Ashevill, NC
Posts: 3
Thanks for the words of encouragment. Definately makes you feel less alone. I'm about to go to bed sober on a Saturday night for the first time in many years. A very strange feeling....but better knowing my problems aren't unique.

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Old 01-02-2010, 09:58 PM
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Living in the moment!
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Wondering where I belong!
Posts: 126
Hi Walt,

Welcome to SR, I am very new to this site too and I am seeing such loving support here!! We are not alone in our journey, which does help!!

Bravo on a sober Saturday night!! Wow, I was sober too......thanks for helping me see this small victory!!

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Old 01-02-2010, 10:04 PM
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 1,006
Hi Walte,


Congrats on your first day - enjoy your hangover-free morning
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Old 01-02-2010, 11:00 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 210,646
Hi Walte

Welcome to SR

My first step was making a commitment not to drink today. I've done that 'today' for nearly 3 years now.

It took a lot of drinking to get me to that point tho, and a lot of failures to get me to accept I was an alcoholic, that every drink was bad for me, and that I needed to do everything I could not to drink again.

It took even more work to be 'ok' with being and living sober too.

I don't want to put you off - it's not easy - but it is possible. And you'll find a great bunch of people here who've done it, in a variety of different ways.

You'll find lots of support here.

Don't rule any avenue of support out just yet, Walte - you may be grateful for it later
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Old 01-02-2010, 11:21 PM
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The New Me starting 1/11/09
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Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: California
Posts: 678
Welcome Walte.

Like Dee said, one day at a time. I found that I needed a combination of recovery tools to do it -- AA, SR, plus working with other alcoholics.

We are all just like you, so I hope you feel at home.

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Old 01-03-2010, 01:06 AM
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Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Qld Australia
Posts: 38
Hi Walte,

I don't feel I'm a place to be giving out too much advise yet, but I also suffer from social anxiety and I used alcohol to get through those uncomfortable situations, but the booze just masks the true issues we face. Once you take away the alcohol I feel like sooner or later I'm going to have to start working on those under lying reasons that caused me to abuse it so much in the first place.
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Old 01-03-2010, 02:54 AM
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tallcactus's Avatar
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Tucson, AZ
Posts: 957
:ghug3 to you Walte.
U can do this. I hope that when U read this in the Am, U will B on your second day.
U have to want to me sober more than anything.
Stay busy, focus on the day, do not think about tomorrow, just get thur the day.
Hope to hear that U are doing well and hope 2 see you go beyond the 3 days.
Rooting 4 U.
Stay strong.
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Old 01-03-2010, 11:16 AM
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Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Paradise
Posts: 4,161
Welcome! In my opinion, SR is a great first step. When I quit, I came here daily and spent lots of time reading and posting. I also went to the library and read everything I could on addiction and recovery. It took me quite awhile to get the courage to try a meeting, but I do get a lot of helpful information sitting in an AA room listening to so many others who have conquered this thing and are living healthier lives.
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Old 01-03-2010, 01:31 PM
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Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Chagrin Falls, Ohio
Posts: 35
Wow. I could have written your words myself. Same age, same anxiety, and was scared as hell to get into AA, due to having to share with others. Luckily, my family got a hold of a local AA and he got me into what I now call my home group. I am sorry I didn't join the group earlier. For the first couple of weeks, I was too mortified to speak, but as I grew to know everyone, my anxiety subsided a bunch. Instead of thinking that the whole room was looking at and analyzing me, I realized that they are there to help, listen and lend any advice I may ask for. I now find myself wigging out more over not[ going to a meeting than going to one. It is amazing the inner peace I feel when I leave a good session. If you'd have asked me two months ago if I could pick up the phone and talk to someone in Raleigh, NC about getting me to a meeting this week, I'd have laughed you off. I did just that, though about 10 minutes ago. Translation...things have gotten much better anxiety wise. I have come to enjoy speaking to fellow AAs and look forward to it.

Best of luck to you in your journey. I will tell you that taking that first step is the hardest part about the whole thing. If you can take that step, the rest comes much, much easier. Take care~GeeQ
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Old 01-03-2010, 03:58 PM
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Ashevill, NC
Posts: 3
Thanks for all the advice and encouragment. Seeing that others have been through the same think and have succeeded gives hope.
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Old 01-03-2010, 04:31 PM
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Location: NY
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We have tried for years, some of us, and have drank daily for years too. We have known no other way and so it is truer then anything you could possibly hear when we say, "If we could do it then so can you." We mean it deep from within our hearts.

Welcome to SR and welcome to the sober journey.
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