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Old 10-27-2009, 08:56 AM
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New Here

I'm new here, but I'm not new to AA or recovery. The longest period of non-drinking has been five years. My drinking began at age eleven and I'm forty-something now. I'm a daily blackout drinker. Every morning I'm full of guilt and remorse as a friend runs down the list of everything I said and did, and everyone I called, texted or communicated with on the internet. He has to do this because I have zero recall. And then the panic begins.

My drinking has caused me to lose the love of my life, and has also caused me to nearly lose my children and I know I must stop.

But I feel good this morning because I wasn't in a blackout last night. I didn't get drunk. I'm not in panic-mode this morning and I am hopeful.

Strangely I fear getting sober more than staying sober, if that makes any sense.

Thanks for reading, and have a great day.
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Old 10-27-2009, 09:00 AM
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bona fido dog-lover
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Welcome to SR! You've come to a great place with lots of supporting and understanding people. Congrats on deciding to stop drinking. That's the first step to living a better sober life.
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Old 10-27-2009, 09:27 AM
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How wonderful! Good for you! And tomorrow's even better!
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Old 10-27-2009, 09:27 AM
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Hi and Welcome,

There is always hope!

I'm glad you found us.
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Old 10-27-2009, 09:29 AM
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You are in the right place. Do you think you might need some medical help? See a doctor if so.

Sobriety is scary at first...

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Old 10-27-2009, 10:16 AM
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Medical Help?

I think I need it and could use medical help, but no insurance. I want counseling because I have PTSD, but can't afford.
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Old 10-27-2009, 10:19 AM
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If you drink everyday to blackout, it's possible that you'll need detox... You need a plan... Perhaps your only option is the ER... but there are others... I think the Salvation Army can help... They have detox places...

Get a plan... Stick to it... We can help, but can't provide the medical help you may need. Get sober... then start with the PTSD, etc...

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Old 10-27-2009, 10:41 AM
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Welcome. I also suggest the ER if you have no insurance. The Salvation Army has a rehab program, but you'd have to be detoxed first.

We'll be here along the way
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Old 10-27-2009, 10:47 AM
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I think I can get through without detox, but I have considered it. And one of the places I called did tell me to go to the ER if nothing else. I'm just going to take it one day at a time and stick around here for support in these next few days. I know it isn't going to be easy, but it beats the alternative.
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Old 10-27-2009, 11:04 AM
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Welcome. If you decide not to seek medical help, please make sure someone close is aware of what you are doing. You are right, it's much better than the alternative. Good luck - keep strong and let us know how you are getting on.
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Old 10-27-2009, 11:21 AM
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hello and welcome to sr.thank goodness you have made the descision to turn your life is so worth previous life is just that now,alcohol holds no attraction at all for me has been a fabulous tool in my recovery.lots of wise and understanding words here.i couldnt stop and stay stopped on my own so i went to AA and got on the 12 steps pretty life has changed beyond recognition! have you considered a recovery plan?
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Old 10-27-2009, 05:33 PM
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Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
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Glad you are here with us....
Welcome to our recovery community.

We do have a thread about de toxing
please click on the link

If you read our experiences ..
note that not one of us are exactly the same.

All my best as you begin a fresh start....
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Old 10-27-2009, 05:41 PM
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Welcome DoneIn

Like others have said - there's always the ER

Good to have you aboard!
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Old 10-27-2009, 07:38 PM
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Disposable Hero
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Old 10-27-2009, 08:43 PM
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Welcome to SR.....stick close.
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Old 10-27-2009, 09:00 PM
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Old 10-28-2009, 02:22 AM
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Sorry folks, didn't make it through the day w/o a takes so little to set me off. Today it was custody issues. Tomorrow maybe the sun will be too bright.
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Old 10-28-2009, 02:27 AM
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The fear of getting sober kept me drunk for a ridiculous amount of years.
Eventually my life got so bad that fear or no fear I had to take the leap.

It's not a pretty descent to get to that point - I don't wish it on anyone - I hope you're smarter than I was.

This is a great place for support, help and encouragement, DoneIn.
Just use it

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Old 10-28-2009, 03:07 AM
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Everyone has already given great advice so all i'll say is and stick around
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Old 10-28-2009, 03:52 AM
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Follow Directions!
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Welcome to SR DoneIn.

First things first, if you are in the US call social services and talk to them about detox and also the Salvation Army, in some areas they do offer detox as well as rehab.

As others have already said the ER is an option, if they give you to much caca tell them you are feeling suicidal......... they have no legal choice but to admit you then!

You said you were not a stranger to recovery, that you had been sober for 5 years, I feel what ever worked for 5 years would certainly work again, go back to what ever worked for those 5 years with a renewed commitment!!!
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