Get over it....
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 26,425
Originally Posted by Lenina 
splenda,
Thank you! That was excellent! My first sponsor once told me that sometimes self-pity was mistaken for depression. Believe me, that bit of insight rocked my world. Self-pity has been my biggest character flaw. Once I was able to consider the difference, I was able to work on it and have since felt much better. At the very least I was able to make note of the of the possibility and focus on gratitude instead of wallowing.
Thanks again.
Love,
Lenina
Thank you! That was excellent! My first sponsor once told me that sometimes self-pity was mistaken for depression. Believe me, that bit of insight rocked my world. Self-pity has been my biggest character flaw. Once I was able to consider the difference, I was able to work on it and have since felt much better. At the very least I was able to make note of the of the possibility and focus on gratitude instead of wallowing.
Thanks again.
Love,
Lenina
the girl can't help it
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: splendraville
Posts: 5,599
True...but sometimes depression is mistaken for self-pity as well
Something i personally learned about my anger is the quicker I get in touch with it the soooner I get over my stupidity to want to go out and harm myself with drinking or drugging.
I read something that helped me gauge my anger that said when anger is old and buried when it surfaces it scalds and when it is current anger it is warn. It feels good to be aware of my current anger and to do something about it that is going in a good direction for me. I had to learn that it is okay to be angry but, it is not okay to express it in ways that cause me or anyone else harm. Anger has a lot of energy and i can do lots of things with that energy. I like to be angry and clean the house, yea baby! I am kind to myself when I feel angry I don't call myself bad names like stupid...I encourage myself by saying I can try again and next time I will do better. I like show others my anger and let them hear my self talk to me to give others the same courtesy's and help them learn to be gentle with themselves. It feels really good to share this kind of energy with another human being especially someone with who I have exchanged angry words with.
It was tough to feel the old scalding anger and admit how mad, and afraid I had been and, to acknowledge my negative behavior towards myself and others. I don't ever ever want to do that to myself or anyone else again. I would much rather just feel everything and keep moving and thinking forward. I don't have time to hate myself anymore.
I love talking to babies in stores who are screaming and show mom's how to make them stop screaming. I love making babies laugh too. Life is too good to waste ya know!!!
Last edited by splendra; 10-06-2008 at 01:40 PM.
IO Storm
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Southern California
Posts: 18,436
I had to become an adult and take responsibility for the screaming baby in me that needed it's diaper changed cause it's butt was burning.
Until we are able to see our juvenile behavior and discipline ourselves we may not be able to get and stay sober.
What an excellent thread. Growing up is dang hard. you have just described
to a "T" why I relapsed over and over and over again..just couldn't "get it".
"Change me, feed me"...and the saddest..."Love me."
Until I accepted what (I) had done...where I was at, and started recovery
at that turning point with my Higher Power..releasing all others from
blame...I couldn't stay sober.
I also loved this part..
Spare the rod...the Shepard's rod was used to keep the sheep from falling off of cliffs and on paths not as something to beat the sheep with...
They have a quick eye, and run to the heels of a stray and set them back
on their course.
So..no self beating....keep your side of the street clean.
Thanks Splendra!
the girl can't help it
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: splendraville
Posts: 5,599
I feel that alcohol does a lot of bad things to the body. I am sure I could not have gotten clean as soon as I did if I had not paid attention to getting my body in balance. I think it made the emotional stuff much easier to deal with,'
Perhaps you would be interested in reading this article on the damage alcohol can do to the body so you can understand why it is a good idea to have help getting clean.
Alcohol and Hormones - Alcohol Alert No. 26-1994
Perhaps you would be interested in reading this article on the damage alcohol can do to the body so you can understand why it is a good idea to have help getting clean.
Alcohol and Hormones - Alcohol Alert No. 26-1994
Member
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 632
I feel that alcohol does a lot of bad things to the body. I am sure I could not have gotten clean as soon as I did if I had not paid attention to getting my body in balance. I think it made the emotional stuff much easier to deal with,'
Ed
the girl can't help it
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: splendraville
Posts: 5,599
I know how difficult it is to not believe what the Emperor of the Sham Kingdom of addiction screams out as he is being over thrown. Be not afraid throw back the curtain and see this emperor for what he is...
the girl can't help it
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: splendraville
Posts: 5,599
There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are messengers of overwhelming grief...and unspeakable love.”
IO Storm
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Southern California
Posts: 18,436
Strange, I was thinking about the saying.. "Get Over Yourself", when I saw this.
Cool.
I like this one, too...
"I am responsible for my own actions"...or the devil didn't make me do it,
or my past, or any other person..
Thanks, Splendra
Cool.
I like this one, too...
"I am responsible for my own actions"...or the devil didn't make me do it,
or my past, or any other person..
Thanks, Splendra
IO Storm
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Southern California
Posts: 18,436
And...I am a behaviorist.. *Lol* to a large degree..social work was my career.
Might even go back to it..
I have seen people , kids...practically destroyed by "what was done to"
them. This was my rage also. And what came out in full force when I drank..
But I have never seen anyone get better until they were finally able to
put away blame, shame, and forever living in the past.
Myself included.
Might even go back to it..
I have seen people , kids...practically destroyed by "what was done to"
them. This was my rage also. And what came out in full force when I drank..
But I have never seen anyone get better until they were finally able to
put away blame, shame, and forever living in the past.
Myself included.
the girl can't help it
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: splendraville
Posts: 5,599
(((((IOStorm)))))
I think you seem like a really cool person. I hope if counseling makes you happy that you will pursue it. I bet you are a master at "getting over it". The more a person gets over it the easier it becomes. I have known people to get over horrendous stuff that was done to them in childhood some it was a wonder that they actually lived through it. I know that some stuff needs to be talked out and put away. But, ultimately a person is responsible for them self.
I have known people who seem to refuse to live life on life's terms. They cannot find a way to connect with the great flow of energy that gives life. I feel compassion for these poor people. I suppose that there is a certain amount of "grace" involved in getting over ones issues. The ones who ask for it and seek it will find it.
I know a woman who was beaten by her alcoholic husband for many years she was born in a communist country and all of her extended family were dead so she had nobody to help her. She had 2 children to raise which she did and she fearlessly protected them from her husband. She protected her standing in the community so her children could have the best that was available to them. After her children were raised she left him and she lived on the most meager of salaries and manged to save enough money to come here to live. I know of no individual who lives so free and so happily she looks many years younger than her age. We practice yoga together I could not believe that she is almost 70 years old she still wears a bikini to the beach and looks HOT with her rippled abs and very toned body!! She is one of the most shining examples of getting over it that I have ever seen.
When she told me her story her face changed and got very dark and lined she did not look like the same person I knew. Then she looked me in the eye and smiled and said" no use crying over spilled milk" and I have never seen that darkness in her face again. AMAZING! I want to wear a bikni at 70 and look as good as her!
I think you seem like a really cool person. I hope if counseling makes you happy that you will pursue it. I bet you are a master at "getting over it". The more a person gets over it the easier it becomes. I have known people to get over horrendous stuff that was done to them in childhood some it was a wonder that they actually lived through it. I know that some stuff needs to be talked out and put away. But, ultimately a person is responsible for them self.
I have known people who seem to refuse to live life on life's terms. They cannot find a way to connect with the great flow of energy that gives life. I feel compassion for these poor people. I suppose that there is a certain amount of "grace" involved in getting over ones issues. The ones who ask for it and seek it will find it.
I know a woman who was beaten by her alcoholic husband for many years she was born in a communist country and all of her extended family were dead so she had nobody to help her. She had 2 children to raise which she did and she fearlessly protected them from her husband. She protected her standing in the community so her children could have the best that was available to them. After her children were raised she left him and she lived on the most meager of salaries and manged to save enough money to come here to live. I know of no individual who lives so free and so happily she looks many years younger than her age. We practice yoga together I could not believe that she is almost 70 years old she still wears a bikini to the beach and looks HOT with her rippled abs and very toned body!! She is one of the most shining examples of getting over it that I have ever seen.
When she told me her story her face changed and got very dark and lined she did not look like the same person I knew. Then she looked me in the eye and smiled and said" no use crying over spilled milk" and I have never seen that darkness in her face again. AMAZING! I want to wear a bikni at 70 and look as good as her!
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