splendra

Yea and when you get there you will find all the the best things in life.

Tangerine13 I had to reparent myself for sure. My parents did the best they knew how to do but still there were things floating around from my childhood that were not useful so I had to reprogram myself so that I could move forward.

Mattcake

bump

MagicMan08

so yeah, i just opened my window...i feel like someone is pumping oxygen right into me....the fresh air feels great....and then! here the fun part, as I can feel the fresh air with the window open, I put on my headphones and am playing thunderstorm music....so it feels like it is raining outside and the fresh air coming in is from the rain cuz that kind of fresh air is great (i live out in the county kinda) lol

Rob B

Here's an article for everyone to consider:

THE EGO FACTORS IN SURRENDER IN ALCOHOLISM

bugsworth

Tiebout forgot the first rule of the Hippocratic Oath:

Do No Harm.

Tiebout was not an alcoholic...he was however Wilsons shrink during his long bout with depression. While Wilson needed ego deflation for sure, not all alcoholics are alike. Many alcoholics need to be built up, not torn down.

Great post Splendra

ex D-Boy

thanks a lot for posting this splendra. this is the first time I read it and it was just what I needed today. Thanks again

Rob B

Spirit moved me to delete my response to Bugs.

stone

That's something I heard somewhere, in my Buddhist readings I think, it's in the same vein as being kind to yourself...'be a parent to yourself'....

I like that.

splendra

As a person who has lived in active addiction since birth I found that if I wanted to have a life that is my own I could not let myself fall back into my family of origin issues when I began therapy. Addiction is very tricky. I believe the 12 steps call it cunning and baffling.

I had to be able to acknowledge what the issues are. I had to be able to see the screaming baby that my addiction is.

I had to become an adult and take responsibility for the screaming baby in me that needed it's diaper changed cause it's butt was burning. I am sure that many children of alcoholics and addicts have sat in a diaper that needed changing or needed to eat and were not fed...

Many of us here grew up in active addiction and have no role model within their own family and it is almost impossible for some people to face the reality that their mom popped pills while the dad was out drinking, gambling and womanizing or some other version of active addiction.

Who we were as children is a part of who we are and that child had ways of getting needs met which when we are unconscious of we can and often do revert back to the childhood method of getting what we want. Until we are able to see our juvenile behavior and discipline ourselves we may not be able to get and stay sober.

Spare the rod...the Shepard's rod was used to keep the sheep from falling off of cliffs and on paths not as something to beat the sheep with...

So beating one's self up is not discipline it is abusive. I learned not to beat myself up it was very difficult to get past. I had to change my own diaper and fed myself...

oh ((((magicman))) I am glad that you can stand in front of a window and let the air in...sweet!!

I prefer AAA cause you get free towing...

Rob B

Splendra, I tried to PM you, your mailbox is filled and needs to be emptied if you want to receive messages.

splendra

Sorry about the full pm box I have to get some disks to down load my messages they are just too good to delete and I don't have enough space on my computer to down load them to it. You can email me if you want.

splendra

bump

DSodaNow

Thanks for this post! It is great!

Bugsworth - I really agree with your point here.

We may not all be alike, but we all do have one thing in common. We are alcoholics with a desire to be sober!

splendra

bump...

NewDayNow

Gettin after it Splendra, Notchin it up.

NewDayNow

Yeah!

Lenina

splenda,

Thank you! That was excellent! My first sponsor once told me that sometimes self-pity was mistaken for depression. Believe me, that bit of insight rocked my world. Self-pity has been my biggest character flaw. Once I was able to consider the difference, I was able to work on it and have since felt much better. At the very least I was able to make note of the of the possibility and focus on gratitude instead of wallowing.

Thanks again.

Love,

Lenina

bostonluv

Thanks for bumping this. I never got to read this before and I think everyone should read this and think quietly: get over yourself!! Love it!!!

Bury the past.....

splendra

I don't think I want to bury the past so much as have an honest look at it and understand that part of my struggle now is about bringing balance to have I have lived and the damage I have caused to myself and others.

I want to make amends to myself by not feeling sorry for myself and being thankful for the opportunity to start again to make different choices that benefit me and my loved ones.

The past is over that is for sure and today is all I really have so I have to do everything I can today to ensure that my past is one that I do not have to live in fear of smacking me down.

gypsytears

I concur .

Thanks Spendra.

I missed this the 1st time around.