RK2007

Same old m8, just can't break the circle today - you know how it is, wondering how you're gonny get dry this time?

I'll be dry again of that I am sure but don't know when or how at the moment...

I'm at the stage where I'm convinced the next time I'm dry again for a couple of days I'll never put myself through this hell again...

I wish I could record feelings and play them back over in my mind so that the next time I'm dry, I never, ever drink again...

barb dwyer

I remember stuff like - I couldn't understand what people were saying to me - I coudl understand each word they said - just not put together any kind of THOUGHT behind the words.... my joints felt like somebody had put broken glss in each one of them, I ws dizzy ... man.

Dn't ever want to do that again.

and YOU don't ever have to do that again , either. this could be IT for you.

barb dwyer

LOL we did it again!

You 'can' record your feelings and stuff - you're doing it right now.

RK2007

lol...

Rusty Zipper

RK for me RK, i was a fear based user...

now things are different.. theres nothing to fear in the dark, thats not there when the light come on...

go see a doc, and try to turn the lights back on RK...

xxoo RZ

RK2007

I thought I'd bump my first thread here - this was before I quit, and hopefully it can send a message of hope out to anybody who is desperate and unable to stop.

I was in the same position - soon after this thread, things got so bad that I went to the doctor - I was so terrified that my sister had to convince me to go and she even came in with me, lol.

It all seems so far away now, but I know if I take one drink I'll be right back there again.

One year down the line, I am trying my damn hardest never to put myself in that position again. If I can stop for a year, then so can anybody - my willpower has always been around the zero mark.

But I don't want to die. I hope this helps somebody in a similar position to the one I was in when I wrote this. It's the first time I've revisited this thread since I left it.

You can stop too.

EDIT - Incidentally, thank you to everybody who posted in this thread because I think you saved my life.

gypsytears

I missed meeting you that 1st post RK but I am damn proud of you and happy to call you friend now. Thanks for bumping it up. I do think it may help someone .

RK2007

Rusty Zipper

congratulations...!

see, your doing it RK!!!

awesome...

and hey, can i audition for the talent contest?

i want to be another Bozo on the Bus!

Reubena

I am so glad you have a year of sobriety behind you! You are an inspiration and we want you around a LONG time

You da best and I am very proud to "know" you.8

Horselover

What a wonderful idea RK! I read through the entire post and it is so true when you see the banter coming from you guys, it would sometimes appear that you never had a problem. I don't know why, but it sure was good to read such a success story coming from that situation. How did you finally recover RK? Did you have to do inpatient or was it a day to day, on your own thing with the help of SR? Just curious about your success. Thanks again!! It helps so many, me included.

RK2007

Thanks Horselover.

It's just a day to day thing for me, with the support of SR and my family and (some of my) friends. I've grown apart from a lot of the people who I used to drink with and have not really filled that gap, but as I'm using up my time doing new things and planning a new future for myself, well - it's time I'm happy to spend on my own at the moment to be honest.

But to answer your question directly - what stops me drinking daily? Truthful answer is the fear of being in that state again, feeling like I could die any minute and that I had no future.

FizzyWater

Thank you RK.

You probably don't realise what an inspiration you are !!!!!!!!!

but you are.

Now if I could only do something about your choice of footie team !

RK2007