Pilgrim

Sherry - in bed but not ready to sleep just yet. I don't think it will be long tho. I hope I have good dreams too. It is really late where you are isn't it?

Hi Stone hun. I guess pain makes time seem to go slower.

I have more time but I still don't seem to be getting things done. Things I want to do and intend to do and should do. I just sort of do the basics and that seems to fill the whole day. You know, remembering to brush teeth, feed animals, feed self, get dressed, washed, show up for work. Phew. It's enough huh?

Where's Dee tonight?

stone

I think its only about 3pm where Sher is.

I just cant get over how fast time is going, I really need to get of my arse and do stuff or the day will be over again. I will just sit here for another hour first tho!
I need to adjust to this new time phenomena thingy, its freakin me out maaan!

I dunno where Dee is hun, he was here last night/your morning.

Pilgrim

O right. Woops. Got my times all mixed up. Maybe I am a bit tired.

Dee74

ta da I am here

I was out *cough cough* blowing 40 candles out on my cake *cough cough*
geez that'll teach me to give a bogus date to SR...lol

see you guys

D

stone

What are you trying to say Dee?

parentrecovers

hang in there, pilgrim....hugs, k

Pilgrim

Thanks K. I have woken up feeling weird too. Almost like I have a mini hangover. Headache, tired and a bit scared. Not fair.

Hi Dee. Happy 40th mate.

parentrecovers

just have a good plan for today - how you're going to stay sober

hugs, k

stone

Hi Steph! Not FAIR! STAMP!

Awww!

Dee74

thanks Steph !
hope you're feeling better soon sweetie...you're under a lot of stress - just remember to stay strong and only do good things for yourself, ok ? :hugs:

(you *have* to do it - it's my birthday - in America anyway)

D

gypsytears

Hi Steph . I see that stone has hogged all the chocolate advice lol! Try it though... it works if you work it .

Pilgrim

Dog ate the chocolate. I thought I had a few precious pieces left.

Hate Friday nights. I got a chick flick.

I had this really insane 10 minutes this afternoon when everyone was heading to the pub. I honestly truely believed for a while that I could drink again normally. I was just going to have a couple. True. That's what my head told me. I completely and utterly forgot everything about my disease. I was one of the normies, surrounded my normies and I was going to pick up a drink and be normal like them. No mental defence is so right. Thanks to God of my complete lack of understanding, I am home and sober. I watched a chick flick instead.

Lonely house. Quiet and dark. Sigh. This is hard still sometimes.

Goodnight.

xxxxxxxxxx

Dee74

I know Steph. and you know this too but I'll say it anyway:

I drank to kill loneliness for years. I guess it worked in a way, but it killed everything else along with it. Too high a price to pay.

Now I'm alive again and I'm dealing with my loneliness - sometimes well, sometimes not....but I am dealing with it, not running away...and I know I'm in far better shape for dealing with it, and anything else life throws at me, if I'm sober.

sleep well
D

parentrecovers

what movie did you get, steph? blessings, k

Fluttering

Acceptance does not mean I have to like it [it being whatever]

henryrhodes3

I feel the same way. I might go to jail for my mistake of possesing drugs.
I am very scared still today 2 days after and dont know what I will do with my
life even if it does turn out ok. I have been through hell so many times over alcohol and drugs I think about ending it all alot latley. BUt I give myself one more day.

Pilgrim

Hi Henry,

Welcome to SR! It's good to have you here. Just take it one day at a time for now. You don't have to have thoughts about what to do with the rest of your life at the moment. I am finding that little seemingly unimportant things (no drama) keeps things ticking along ok for now.

Do you have a programme or anything to help you other that SR?

Hi Alla! It was so weird. I was utterly convinced that the whole alcoholism thing was baloney. It just seemed so right to be there with my friends and to have a drink. It passed but I saw very clearly the second part of step one. There was a blackout in my memory about how it used to be. If I managed to conjure up some memory of it, I just thought that it wouldn't be like that any more. It would be like it was when I started drinking. So scary.

K - I got a silly one called the Lake House. I quite liked it. I like most movies really. Not very discerning, me.

Dee74

I can never watch Keanu Reeves without thinking of Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure.

Totally bogus.

D

fooled everyone

Hi Pilgram,
I just logged on and saw your message. If at all possible try to lean on your higher power at this point. If you pray he will answer. He is always there for you. Can you get to an AA meeting? Have you ever been? You will find people there that want to help. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

IO Storm

We're still with ya Steph...

And hello Henry!

Love,

:

IO