Barely Hanging On...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Recovery
Posts: 3,229
Barely Hanging On...
I'm barely hanging on but I'm still hanging. This day has sucked so bad. I really want to drink............ and I hate that I want to drink. I miss drinking but it causes so much trouble in my life. I had a love/hate relationship with alcohol. It seemed ok only for a little while but when blackouts, hangovers, police intervention, and humiliation came in the picture, the fun was long gone.
I want to go the distance. I want to stay sober and yet I want to drink so bad!
I'm postponing it for tomorrow. If I say I'll drink TOMORROW and only focus on TODAY then TOMORROW will become TODAY and I'll deal with it then.
Not drinking or using just for today.
I want to go the distance. I want to stay sober and yet I want to drink so bad!
I'm postponing it for tomorrow. If I say I'll drink TOMORROW and only focus on TODAY then TOMORROW will become TODAY and I'll deal with it then.
Not drinking or using just for today.
yeah, I know what you mean, man...
today has been the first whole day I spent at home since I got 'dry' a week ago (well, first full day home and not detoxing) and I've had thoughts here and there that I 'should' have a drink in my hand...
so I've tried to keep busy, I cleaned up a bit, I took a walk, listened to music, I jumped on here a fair few times to get some inspiration and draw some strength...I think when you miss something, you gotta try and put something in it's place.
Seems to be working, at least for today. I'm getting through.
hang in there...I think it's the right way, compartmentalising it and looking at it day by day...deal with tomorrow tomorrow
D
today has been the first whole day I spent at home since I got 'dry' a week ago (well, first full day home and not detoxing) and I've had thoughts here and there that I 'should' have a drink in my hand...
so I've tried to keep busy, I cleaned up a bit, I took a walk, listened to music, I jumped on here a fair few times to get some inspiration and draw some strength...I think when you miss something, you gotta try and put something in it's place.
Seems to be working, at least for today. I'm getting through.
hang in there...I think it's the right way, compartmentalising it and looking at it day by day...deal with tomorrow tomorrow
D
yeah, I know what you mean, man...
today has been the first whole day I spent at home since I got 'dry' a week ago (well, first full day home and not detoxing) and I've had thoughts here and there that I 'should' have a drink in my hand...
so I've tried to keep busy, I cleaned up a bit, I took a walk, listened to music, I jumped on here a fair few times to get some inspiration and draw some strength...I think when you miss something, you gotta try and put something in it's place.
Seems to be working, at least for today. I'm getting through.
hang in there...I think it's the right way, compartmentalising it and looking at it day by day...deal with tomorrow tomorrow
thinking of ya
D
today has been the first whole day I spent at home since I got 'dry' a week ago (well, first full day home and not detoxing) and I've had thoughts here and there that I 'should' have a drink in my hand...
so I've tried to keep busy, I cleaned up a bit, I took a walk, listened to music, I jumped on here a fair few times to get some inspiration and draw some strength...I think when you miss something, you gotta try and put something in it's place.
Seems to be working, at least for today. I'm getting through.
hang in there...I think it's the right way, compartmentalising it and looking at it day by day...deal with tomorrow tomorrow
thinking of ya
D
hope4 -
I'm starting eight months sober, and am still not 'above' tricking myself into not going for that first drink. We do what we gotta, and I think that's a good way to tell yourself to hold off...
way to go!
I'm starting eight months sober, and am still not 'above' tricking myself into not going for that first drink. We do what we gotta, and I think that's a good way to tell yourself to hold off...
way to go!
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: MA.
Posts: 1,719
Hope,
I too share your struggle of truly wanting to be sober and not drink, and at the same time, thoughts of wanting to drink,to drown my sorrows, is like slow torture...
You have done the right thing by expressing it here, Hope...You will be ok...
Thinking of you...
I too share your struggle of truly wanting to be sober and not drink, and at the same time, thoughts of wanting to drink,to drown my sorrows, is like slow torture...
You have done the right thing by expressing it here, Hope...You will be ok...
Thinking of you...
One thing that I try to do today is to live according to the Principles that I have been taught. Yes to be honest I love getting high! I would be lying if I said that I didn't but what I don't like is that I can not control it. I hate that. So today we have a choice. I guess this is what I like. I can choose to use or not. I have the choice there was a time when I was using when I didn't have that choice. Actually one time someone says that relapse usually happens in the first year. So maybe we just need to hang on like you said until this passes. Glad that you are here.
With Love and Respect
Vic
With Love and Respect
Vic
I think when you miss something, you gotta try and put something in it's place.
((((Hope)))))
Stay strong sweetie!!!!! This too shall pass.......
Vic is right, you have the choice!!! That is a good thing!!!! Just tell that evil voice to go away because you chose not to play TODAY!!!!!
Let us know how you are!!!!
~HUGS!~ Liss
Stay strong sweetie!!!!! This too shall pass.......
Vic is right, you have the choice!!! That is a good thing!!!! Just tell that evil voice to go away because you chose not to play TODAY!!!!!
Let us know how you are!!!!
~HUGS!~ Liss
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Recovery
Posts: 3,229
I'm still hanging on. I was having an ok day until the last hour or so now the cravings are starting in full force.
I had a drinking dream last night. I dreamed that I was in a bar drinking tequila. I woke up and it was scary because it felt so real.
I am really upset now because my mom has flipped out on me and she is screaming. Anger is a big trigger for me so hopefully I will get through this crap.
I had a drinking dream last night. I dreamed that I was in a bar drinking tequila. I woke up and it was scary because it felt so real.
I am really upset now because my mom has flipped out on me and she is screaming. Anger is a big trigger for me so hopefully I will get through this crap.
Cheryl always with you congrats on getting through this and keep going.
Remember drinking/using dreams can also be a form of release you being getting rid of the past by expressing it.
I am with you and holding your hand we can do this, I can't but we can.
Love Kevin
Remember drinking/using dreams can also be a form of release you being getting rid of the past by expressing it.
I am with you and holding your hand we can do this, I can't but we can.
Love Kevin
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