bee62

I am jealous Chris..never got to see Pink, too expensive-they were in Tampa during the Wall years and the tix were 75$+
Glad you are doing well.
I hurt for TJ...
Melissa

Rusty Zipper

Melissa... happy to see think'n's stil legal...

chris... seeing a gig sober is awesome... play'n ones even better... am happy i have that oportunity now... my first one was another reason... why the hell would i ever want to go back out there... it was the experance of my new lifetime...

nights all...

blessings out to you (((teej)))

xxoo, (_rz_)

chrisj728

hia tj & all, well todays been hard for me or should I say harder than usual, its my daughter Angies B day, I havnt seen her for 19 yrs,and each year gonne by I would drink into oblivion for like 2days before and at least 2 days after. Same when it was my eldest sons birthday in febuary.
But today as in febuary Ive mannaged to not drink, today I dont have to numb the guilt away with alcohol, I can now see that it wasnt all my fault that me and there mom split, it was the fault of both of ours. I've mannaged to reach these decissions by getting sober with the help of AA and SR.
Both have given me the tools required to deal with past. Today i can look back without guilt or remorse for my actions, knowing that its my story my life.
I heard a share at my home group last night that has convinced me more than ever that I'm doing the right thing for me. They said that they had worked on cancer wards and aids wards often seeing the terminaly ill die in pitiful circumstances. But recently they had transfered to an alcohol dependancy unit, were they said that to watch how an alcoholic died was even worse than even an aids or cancer sufferer. How the liver actualy ruptures eventualy after many days of suffering. A frightening thought indeed, but one that I have used today to bolster my resolve. I guess my HP put that man there sharing last night just incase I thought I could get away with drinking today as I always used to. Oh I still sang happy birthday to her though, exept today I sang it without slurring.
Soz for the ramble but its good to share.

inabit chris

teej

Chris, how come you haven't tried getting ahold of them yet? I'm sure it would do their hearts good to know that you've missed them all of these years. Just tell me this is none of my business if I'm overstepping my bounds. I just care.

chrisj728

Its like this tj, I just hold on to the hope that when there ready to see me then they will get in touch. For me to try and walk back into there lives after so long might make for big trouble. So ill just have to wait till they want to and ill be here for them. But unlike the drunken father that there mother has undoubtedly painted me as, ill be sober for them when that day comes. Tj of cause I dont mind you caring, sh1t we all need someone to care.

inabit
chris

teej

I think YOU should make the first move and let them know what you just told me. But thats just me?

chrisj728

tj i guess im just so fkn insecure that rejection fightens the fk outa me, its a part of me that needs working on.

teej

how do you think you're going to work on it if you don't confront it?

teej

Could be a very pleasant surprise!

bee62

Chris, drama happens far less than we fear it might.
Start off with a letter or a card....a picture of you smiling, sharing a funny memory, keep it short and light hearted...
Like TJ says, could be the best thing you've ever done and might take away from that heavy load you've been toting around..

Love ya

Melissa

teej

what bee said!

Golfman

chris, rz, bee, tj...the list goes on. so many friends that now i can't remember them all. just a few months ago i didn't have any friends. not because i stink or anything, just cause i didn't have any friends to have intelligent conversations with. for that matter, i didn't have any friends to have un-intelligent conversations with either.

you guys are the best...never once judging, always caring, sometimes kickin' some arse when it needs to be kicked. having people in my life that are honest about themselves is so reassuring. and i've been around for 20+ years, so you know i'm not lyin' just happy to be invited to the party ya know?

each and every one of you deserves a great big kiss. chris and rz, i'll let tj and bee take care of you guys. tj and bee, pucker up

now let's go play in the mud.

love ya,
Ed

teej

i'm there Ed!!!!!!!!!! Only do ya think we could just talk rz into getting rid of the vagina picture on his avatar?

I would kiss chris though! His avatar is a good one

teej

plus, as I forgot to mention! Ed.............YOU ROCK DUDE!

teej

BEE???????????????? Needin some help here!

Rusty Zipper

teej alright already...

idea time... ... not that... teej, why dont you start a find zip a new avi thread...

i found another vagina eye, this ones in technicolor... and a zipper amusment park ride... maybe one of you alll can find the perfect one... oh, crap, now its perfection...


love you kids...

(_rz_)

teej

is that supposed to be like the hole????? Why do we all adore you???? you sicko! Ok, I will look at avatars for you but does it have to be horny like?

Golfman

hey, i like the dude's avatar. what's the deal? kinda looks like the t-rex eye from jurassiac park.

teej

jesus Ed dont give him false hopes?????? Shup!!!!!!

gypsytears

Ah so it's back to normal around here then? Feeling better TJ ?

I always thought RZ's avatar looked like a gross lizard eye or something to that effect. You people just have such dirty minds. Sheesh !

Hey TJ... what did you ever find out about your blood pressure? I looked up the thread you started about drinking good stuff (coffee & V- lol) but didn't see any up-date so to speak.