ayla zaire

i moved a lot, too...and my friends were always boys, too, sometimes i really miss my male friends...i blended so well that they acted like guys around me...they weren't polite like they can be when there is a girl around...you learn a lot about men that way!!! and it's true, they are pigs (in more ways than one!)...i've always been much more comfortable in a room full of men than a room full of women...that's why it's so refreshing to talk to my sistas every day...no testosterone!!!

hi alissa!

scootinbabe

lolli! are you out there liss? it's been a long time...

hi beezy you sk8ter girl you!

hi alissa! how beautiful your life sounds. lemon trees and pecans, fettucini and cookies. can smell it just by reading it! yum.

--back to laundry, ya'll

ayla zaire

have i ever said how much i hate laundry...I HATE LAUNDRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

c'est la vie

hi alissa!

I can't believe how often we post about doing laundry. Doesn't it EVER get done. God Help me I have about 7 loads to do and I've been avoiding it all day.

beezy, it's so interesting learning little bits about each of us. Thanks for sharing that about your childhood. oops hubs home, gotta run. I agree with that easy feeling about not having to think or worry about glasses or bottles or wrappers or breath or slurring or anything. It's a great thing.

janeeyre

The other day my H mentioned he'd done some "laundry math" and figured that every day our family produces at least 30 items to be washed--which does not include sheets, towels, etc. Absolutely frightening.


I just got home from the grocery store, which is next door to the liquor store. In the checkstand it crossed my mind to get cash back when paying for groceries, then take the cash next door to buy some wine. (Don't want to write a check there, you know...too obvious) It felt SO GOOD to write that check for only the amount my groceries cost and not give in to the siren song of the liquor store.
TAKE THAT, YOU ROTTEN ALKY VOICE. HA!

Jane

Smyle

I just ran into an ex that ended terrible...I was a mess...we only went out a couple times...OMG..I feel so wierd right now.....He came up to me in the store....I mean I just barely remembered him...only reason is cause he had a twin and he was cute...he remembered my name..but I have NO idea what his is....he just asked how i was...blah blah...i said great ..he asked about the kids...whatever...I said yep..mine..nice to see you and walked away..i was rude but I don't feel like I need to stand there and chat with some fling from like 12 years ago...I knew I should have kept my damn hair short....Oh well...I am just glad k was not there ...though he would have laughed about it and thinking about him laughing about it makes me laugh...he is so cool I am glad I married him. I was such a mess !!!! Glad I was pretty up front with him...from the beginning. Oh why must I still have these reminders..I thought I moved away from that...see you cannot run from it gals....it will find you ...

~Beezy ....

ayla zaire

slow day on the ranch...beezy...the week after my mom died...one of my exes...the worst one...he f***ed me over bigtime...called me! an old friend of mine gave him my #...he told me how sorry he was blah blah blah...then, when i was out shopping with my aunts for something to wear at my mom's memorial, we went to this mall and out to eat....and he was my freakin' server!!!! i swear i was mortified...then he started telling people that he still had feelings for me...12 years later!!!..what an idiot...i think he was regretting the good thing he let go...he is 32 and a server, no kids with a phyco girlfriend...and i have a good marriage and three great kids...plus i'm hot...hehe...
but seriously it sucks when your past comes back to bite you in the a**...i am not proud of the person i was with him...i did a lot of drugs and was a sad person...i had no self respect and no self esteem...and all i could think of when i saw him was...that's what he sees when he looks at me...that desperate, stupid girl who let him cheat and abuse her for 2 years....and it was not a good feeling...i wanted to shout...you don't know me! i'm not her anymore!!!

xdeathx

god bless all you moms. ur stronger then us men.. and thats why u can deal with so much in life and keep sane. god bless

NYCGirl

Wow C'est we must be on the same wave length or something. Not a good one this time. I've been in a major funk lately and been thinking alot about drinking. don't feel like tyoing much but I've been reading alot. I'll be back in the morning

ayla zaire

there are so many things i would like to say to you nyc and ces't...and anyone who is thinking about using or drinking...but i know it will do no good...and it will not influence you one way or another...we are all responsible for our own sobriety and our own lives...but i hope and pray you find the strength i know you have and stay sober today...and tomorrow...and i hope that nasty addiction will quit leaking poison thoughts into your head...like there is a relapse coming on or i don't know if i can make it another day without drinking (using)...and remember that while you are an addict and you can not control your addiction you can control how you respond to that voice...by going to a meeting or finding your friends to talk to and letting it out...and i hope that before you pick up that drink or drug you will think of the person you were vs. the person you are today...we may be screwed up but i for one have a new found self respect that i would not trade for anything...and i will not go back...only to have to start over and lose all i have gained...if only for today...i can't say what i'll do tomorrow, but today i am sober and damn proud of it...and i hope and pray that with strength and determination i will be able to say the same thing tomorrow and for the rest of my life....

Fred

Hiya Ladies,
Just want to say 'hi' and that I hope today was at least manageable,, but hopefully maah..velous, for all of my friends that help me keep 'John Barleycorn' outta my house and outta me.
Count me in on those vacations! I just know I'm going to win the lottery....just as soon as I remember to buy a ticket!
lol.
luv,
Maureen

c'est la vie

it worked, scoot!
nyc, I hope you have some outlet for your thoughts. They really can build up to some disasterous proportion unless you can let the steam out of them. I told my sponsor all about my relapse planning (or fearing) and it seemed to take the power out of the thought. She didn't tell me to go out and do more "experimenting" and she didn't tell me to stop thinking that way. She just listened. It was really good.

Ayla, I hear ya loud and clear and even if you don't think your words make a difference, I'll tell you that they do. That's why we all post here. Someone is bound to come along and say something that strikes someone else. It may even be someone reading and not posting that sees your message and doesn't pick up today. If I sat here in my hellhole yesterday I would have drank. Instead I posted here a bunch, went to a meeting, and talked to a live person. It really is about getting out of our heads and DOING something.

scootinbabe

good morning, gal pals!

so good to hear your update c'est! it really does help talking it out.

nyc--hang in there!

fred--keep on keeping on! you're doing great!

today, i need to get my life back in order. (boy, couldn't i say that everyday?)

just wanted to check in and give ya'll some hugs. bbl



ok--where's the smilie that is doing laundry, picking up toys, washing dishes and doing bills?
and the grocery shopping, commuting, soccer mom smilie? need to talk to the keeper of the smilies--lol!

ayla zaire

good morning...c'est...i'm so glad you made it through yesterday...i'm proud of you!.

have a great day girls...i'll check in later and see how everyone's doing...looks like another slow day at the ranch...we mommies are busy busy busy!!!

sophie is sick...bad cough and fever...so mommie is sleep deprived again...oh well, story of my life....i'll take a nap and burn some tuna helper...

love and hugs...
ayla

Candy Scratch

Good morning wonderful Mommies!

Today I am feeling a little psychic and I predict that:

We will get at least two loads of laundry done!
We will take a moment to have a cup of tea or coffee and reflect on our spiritual or inner self.
We will forcefully push the evil apparition of the "addicted voice" completely out of our minds and heck, right out of the neighbourhood.
We will look in the mirror and say, "You are beautiful and strong and your life is getting better every day."
We will hug our children and tell them how much they mean to us.
We will not drink or use today.

Love and hugs to all you and hope you have a great, productive day! Gotta run, but will try to check back later on...

CS

Smyle

I just found out my niece and ex SIL were killed in a car wreck.... I am going down to be with my broter...Please pray for us and I will be gone indefinitely...Thanks and I will need you all right now...please be right here when I come back....I cannot believe this....
~Barbara

Madalaina

Oh Beezy, I'm so sorry to hear this! Please know that we love you! You and your family have lots of prayers coming yalls way!


Love and Condolences!
Alissa

Krys_wyo

Well my 3yr old decided that her little dwarf hampster needed to play in the Dora castle, im not sure what happened but she said she kind of smooshed him, but he isnt doing well, for the last 16 hours he has been kind of floppin back and forth and i just wish the poor thing would give up, it is sad to watch him go through all of this.
Oh and i forgot te mention this little guy was lost in the house a few days ago so the older ones decided she needed a new pet so now this is my house tally............
3 dwarf hampsters all in cage and accounted for.
2 Mini lop rabbits in cage accounted for
3 dogs
2 rats......1 in cage accounted for and 1 MIA!!!
plus 3 horses out at corral.
3 adults
(my friend and her daughter are living with us)
5 kids (3 are mine 1 is my friends 17 yr old daughter and 1 is 18 and is a sort of adopted boy we brought up from the south with us, however he bought a trailer and will be moving out this weekend)

HELPPPPPPP MEEEEEEEEEEE

ayla zaire

oh my god...prayers for beezy and her poor family...i'm in tears right now...i'm so sorry this happened, i don't know what to say...

janeeyre

Oh, Beezy--I'm thinking of & praying for you & your family today. How awful.