Dee74

Last part here:
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...-three-20.html (Class of August 2021 Support Thread Part Three)

D

ClearPath64

Eww, Viking. I might have to sit out National Double Cheeseburger Day. It looks like most of these food days should be followed by National Angioplasty Day. Yikes

Glad you caught yourself feeling a little overconfident. SR definitely keeps you grounded. I made the mistake of straying from here in past and it's not happening again. So you're stuck with me people!

Not really much to say tonight but am trying to be the first one to post on the new thread. Which I'll confirm as soon as I hit Post.....now!

ClearPath64

Good night everyone. Talk to you tomorrow.

Free2bme888

Congrats on shotgun!

Numblady

Viking! I am so glad I know about National Dumpling Day. Everyone can mark it on their upcoming calendars for 9/26. I’ve long said if I could open a restaurant it would just be different dumplings forum around the world. But actually I think what I really want is for someone else to just open that and put it close to my house. Are you still on the 24 hour thread or that is past? I never have spent much time there but have just kind of wondered what it’s all about. I guess it’s what It says it is.

Thanks for the supportive words about the additional conversations I need to have with my husband. He has just been so sad and shocked. For as much pain as I’ve felt over the years with him I definitely don’t like causing it.

Not too much else to tell. We are possibly getting a dog today. A rescue. She is part Great Dane so pretty big. The kids and I have wanted a dog for a really long time and husband recently said yes. He is trying to give me more of the life i want. Which is where we care more about the inhabitants of the house than the things. Where It’s okay to spill things. Where kids’ friends can come over and I don’t have to feel on edge he’ll be mad they’re there. And people are safe and not walking on eggshells. I will definitely grant that he is genuinely motivated toward change. I just fear it’s too late as far as he and I go (but not too late for the kids to get the predictable loving dad they need).

And I am still happily sober. Shared a coca-cola last night with my son. That felt about right. I’m grateful I don’t feel temptation right now. and to the point Dee always makes, I do feel like I’m working toward a life I love. Not because it’s perfect but because it’s authentic.

I think I woke up too early. My brain is not firing, which is a problem because it’s a big day. Maybe I can sneak in a nap, one of the greatest treats in life and a privilege of working from home (with a very flexible boss…I mean, I wouldn’t say I was sneaking in a nap but as long as you get your work done that’s what genuinely matters to her. And I get a lot of work done).

Bye for now. Good luck today, everybody!

Bodhi02

Hi NL and CP!

NL I love your idea of a dumpling restaurant that sounds delicious and fun. I really like trying new restaurants. In regards to your husband I hope he does make changes for your and your kids sake! Sounds like he’s trying so that’s at least a good sign!

I woke up a little before my alarm this morning which I take to mean I had a good night sleep. I feel like my body’s natural rhythm is getting back on track. I’m doing a 6 week mindfulness course at work and excited to have the first class today.

I have a group project assignment for the grad school program I'm in and I’m getting very annoyed with the other 2 people. They just don’t move as fast as I would like and procrastinate. I’ve outline my approach on how to tackle the project which was basically let try it on our own first (professors instructions) and then meet to discuss here are the dates and time I’m available. The one guy came back and said let’s start a group chat and said we can figure it out next Monday. Im like ok why postpone making a plan but I’m just a planner and I’m maybe too organized? I got a lot going on so it’s frustrating to have to deal with other people when I just want to get it done. I’m trying to be open minded but ugh group projects like why did the professor do this? Lol I do wonder if the other people have full time jobs or if they’re full time students. Anyways it’ll all work out I just have to be patient and go with the flow it’s due on the 25th so there’s time.

ClearPath64

Good morning everyone. I just love logging on to SR second thing in the morning (coffee prep being first, of course) and catching up. And NL, although I'm sorry you woke up too early, it was nice not to be the first one to post today. I always look forward to your thoughtful and genuine posts. There is no doubt in my mind, none at all, that with your continued long term sobriety you are going to find your authentic self, spread your wings, and find the happiness you deserve. You are a special person.

So, the adventures in sleep continue. Decided to go on Amazon and order a natural sleep supplement. Melatonin chewables. Not much of an investment. Two of them, 30 minutes before bed time. Definitely felt a little groggier when my head hit the pillow. Falling asleep has never the problem for me though. Woke up a little more than three hours later, as nature always calls once during the night, regardless of my liquid intake the evening before. And this is where the trouble always lies. Even though my head was cloudier than usual and I could feel the effects of the supplement, it took at least 45 minutes for me to get back to sleep. Tried to focus on breathing, but nothing seemed to work. I was determined not to throw in the towel and get up, and sleep finally did return, but those 45 minutes seem like eternity when sleep is the only thing you crave. I feel slightly groggy this morning, but nothing that a couple cups of coffee can't cure. I'm just going to have to keep working on this and see if I can shorten up that 'back to sleep' window. Maybe counting sheep. Which reminds me, Lamb? Where are you girl? I know you're lurking out there somewhere. I'm thinking that you are right at that 40 day mark, am I right? Come out from behind that curtain so you can be properly recognized!!!

More later guys. Two days until 'go' time. Still haven't started packing. Serial procrastinator, but I can improve on that too. All good. Perfect running morning. LET'S GO!

ClearPath64

Bodhi! I think you and I hit Post at the exact same time. Wow it's good to have company out here in the morning!

I hope you enjoy your mindfulness class, and I feel for you regarding your group project. I'll bet that NL has some things to say about that as well, based upon her recent experiences with her project team at work. As I started reading about your plight, my mind immediately thought "I'll bet they're guys", which you later confirmed, at least for one of them. Are we talking about early 20-something guys here Bodhi? If so, I don't know what to tell you. Just good luck getting to the finish line, and back to individual projects. (Sorry to all the 20-something guys out there who are not procrastinators and bad team players. Just haven't met you.)

katlin

Good Morning, all. It's a rainy dark day in my neck of the woods so unlike you NL and CP, I slept in. I know we are not to dispense medical advice since we're not doctors (even though Free is married to one) but in the spirit of sharing personal experience, I can off that I've had some success getting calmed and ready for sleep at night by using 5-HTP. I get it on Amazon. If you google it there's a good article from Psychology Today that addresses some of the purported benefits. I take it about 30 minutes or so before I plan to get in bed.

NL - I think it's great that you are getting a dog. I've always thought giving the entire family a focus for collective affection is a very positive move.

CP - you have probably told us how long you're staying in NYC but I can't recall. Long weekend? Week? I just watched a news story about the reopening of Broadway. What a wonderful time to take a trip there. A serial procrastinator? Oh, my. I could write a book. It's another "trait" I got from my Dad. You need to get busy packing and get into a NY State of Mind (uh oh ... it's time for Billy Joel songs to play in your mind today)!

katlin

P.S. It's National Toasted Cheese Day. IMO, it doesn't get any better than that! If you happen to be watching carbs, you can celebrate National Felt Hat Day by wearing a hat or even National Make A Hat Day if you're crafty. At any rate, it's a good day to have a great and sober day!

LoveHateWhine

Good Morning everyone! Katlin, NL, CP, Free, Bodhi, BGF, Dee, Venus, and anyone else my brain fog mind is forgetting!

I am not sleeping well these days. My shoulder issue seems to have resolved itself, but now my hand and fingers are numb and tingling. Clearly I have an impingement in the cervical spine area, which my PT had mentioned previously. We had hoped the exercises would help, but they are not. I just scheduled another PT appointment for tomorrow afternoon. Hopefully we can get some course of action going for this. It is a weird feeling to have all day long and my fiance is very concerned. He had a major back surgery about 6 years ago and said his issues started out this way.

We are also starting an 8-week Tai Chi class tomorrow. That should be interesting! Between the Tai Chi classes, daily golf for the fiancee, occasional golf for me and now PT for the both of us, our schedules are jammed. Plus, this weekend we are visiting friends to play golf ... they live about 2 hours away. Glad to be busy!

Everyone have a great day.

LHW

Bodhi02

CP- I’m not sure of their ages since it’s all virtual and they don’t typically turn on their video during class. I’m a project manager at my job so I’m really used to setting the agenda, action items, and approach with my team and them being like ok got it! But these guys or at least the one doesn’t offer an approach he just suggested pushing off planning another week which is so counterproductive! Ugh!! Lol I’m mostly finding it funny that I’m getting so frustrated but ya know I’m still frustrated and that’s ok!

LHW- please so share how the Tai chi classes go! They sounds interesting.

venuscat

I would be telling my project team mates how I feel Bodhi....that would drive me crazy.

VikingGF

NL- I am on the 24 hour thread every day. It holds me accountable and brings me some good comfort. As for dumplings, there is just no other food so satisfying. My friends and I made pork dumplings from scratch once- it took all day and we made about 150 for 9 of us. Let's just say there were no leftovers! It was the best Chinese New Year celebration ever, but I will say, having a dumpling house nearby is preferable to making them all yourself! I will be partaking of dumplings with you on the 26th for sure.

ClearPath64

Just a quick post before heading to bed guys. Later than usual night for me, with good reason. Too tired to provide an adequate explanation tonight, so will be back here in the morning. I didn't want to break tradition and not wish everyone a good night. Hope everyone sleeps well.

Free2bme888

You too, CPath.

ClearPath64

3:17am. Yep, back on this schedule again. Didn't even try to fight the fight and force myself back to sleep. Other things on my mind this morning. Which is why I'm sitting here now.

One of the many things that I love about this place is that I can be fully honest and transparent with you guys. This is a safe space where I don't need to hide or lie about anything. So here goes.

Barely over a week ago I sat here and described to you guys my adventure with the online dating service, which resulted in me being on the hook for another year, and my decision to give it a more honest effort. Here were my exact words at the end of that post:

"Story over. I know that the recommendation from many of the veterans here on SR is 'don't date in early sobriety'. I get it. I don't even think that I'm necessarily interested in dating right away. Just want someone to interact with and talk to. Kind of like I do here. Plus, I'm paying for the service anyway, so I might as well use it."

Venuscat reiterated that dating in early sobriety is typically a bad idea and didn't recommend it. I took heed of this advice and fully intended to keep things at arms length in the beginning.

But then the unexpected happened. On Saturday morning, I landed upon someone's profile that really interested me and decided to reach out to her. By mid-morning she had responded, and we seemed to click immediately. Many messages back and forth over the next couple of days, culminating in our decision to meet in person last night. It couldn't have gone any better. We were at the restaurant for two hours, but it seemed like five minutes. We learned so much about each other. It was a magical evening for me. I hope it was at least an enjoyable one for her. I guess that time will tell.

But here's the thing. If it doesn't work out and she decides that I wasn't her cup of tea, that's fine. I'll be a little disappointed, but I'll move on, secure in my sobriety. Will have no impact on that. Zero. My sobriety, all 47 days of it, has enabled me to get myself out there and take a chance. I feel like a confident, capable person, for maybe the first time in my life. I'm not afraid.

Venus, I don't want you to think that I simply discarded your advice, as I truly appreciate the time and care you take with each and every one of us. But I know I can handle this.

Floating on a bit of a cloud this morning and it feels good.

Dee74

I hope it works out CP.

This may seem a little brutal but it's heartfelt advice.

Its good you're prepared for it not working out but there's another reason why folks say no new relationships for a while tho and one of those reasons is the floating on a cloud thing..it feels great, so why wouldn't we want to feel like that?

Well...Its pretty close to the feeling we used to chase as alcoholics and addicts.
Be self aware and make sure you're not chasing a buzz, slipping into old ways, cos many a good man (or woman) has been ambushed like that.

Not gonna lie, I was a hot mess at 47 days. I would have been inflicting myself on someone just to make myself feel better.

Be sure of your motives.

There is time for all the things you want - make sure you're really ready and not just impatient.

D

Numblady

Hoping to catch up later. Dog and bad night of sleep are changing the morning routine! Just saying hi.

ClearPath64

Thanks Dee. That doesn't seem brutal to me at all. I appreciate the honest, thoughtful advice, and I will keep it in mind going forward. I hope that you have a good night.