Zura

Good Morning
How is everyone? How was your visit with your friend Steely? Hope you all are having/had a wonderful weekend. Mine was very quiet & relaxing, have woken up unwell today & so have to reschedule my annual skin cancer check, but no biggy. Sending you all my love xxoo

venuscat

I hope you feel better dearest Zura. ❤️

Zura

Thanks hun, its just annoying because i had such a relaxing weekend and im restless, wanna get out in the garden, but first world problems as they say how are you?

venuscat

Well, I had to deal with my landlords here most of the day.....they have three tenants who do nothing....re their yards and tree-trimming in this kind of square of four of us....so they come and do the work. In 30+ degrees, and then my landlady almost passed out. So they were here getting water and nourishment.....I gave Rosie Aussie yoghurt. She loved it.

And then I helped them.....and let them sit in my yard on the swing to rest in between tree cutting and such. And then Paul took photos of all of my plants and decorations.
So a mixed bag really....how can I not be grateful and how can I not be annoyed to never get any privacy?

The garden is ALMOST done. So once I get some time to finish tomorrow I can do pics. I hope. LOL. Life huh? ❤️

Zura

The old double edged sword! What a day for you! I hope it all settles down soon, you have had a lot of tradies etc around lately from the sounds of it. It was lovely of you to look after them xxoo

Zura

Good Morning,
Well still managed to get some stuff done in the garden, so yay. How is everyone going?

venuscat

Almost done in the garden.....just the heat and humidity here is insane.....95% H in the mornings and the temp goes up so fast.
Never going to get used to this. s xx

Zura

That is insane!! Extreme weather is hard, retrospectively the climate hear sounds perfect (although it feels extreme at times)...well take care

venuscat

It is....it's crazy.....no idea how people survive this.
Not this little Aussie cat.....Nick and I are planning to move next year.....somewhere on the water.
For now, I just need to get up at 6am every day if I want to water in the am....I can do that.

How are you love? s xx

Zura

That sounds nice, being near the water. I would live on the coast if i could but im settled where I am. I'm doing ok, getting better.

venuscat

Glad to hear that honey ❤️

Zura

Hey everyone,
It is so quiet in here lately im never sure what to say anymore lol. Things are good with me, ive had some idle time and been fantasizing about growing things that are too big to grow in my yard (like nut trees) and things not suited to my climate (like avocado). Im NOT adding any new projects until i have finished my current projects and everything is running like clockwork, especially not fantastical "some people have had success with" likely to fail projects, but its fun to dream about.
I hope everyone is doing well, and hope to hear from you again soon Steely xxoo

venuscat

What was that thing we learned in primary school about growing (an) avocado from the pit in glass with a satay stick?
He he.....going to look that up. s

Glad you are doing well honey. ❤️❤️

Steely

Thank you for excusing me from class girls. Been doing a lot of thinking, and sometimes felt like I might poison the petunias the way I was heading. Felt like a spud in a rose garden. I'm feeling a lot better now. More control. Feels like I've found the rudder, though my hand still slips from time to time. Learning to navigate, sail. Oops, here come a monster wave. Over the top, I go. And now I can see you. And I won't let the old alma mater down, even in high seas.

Today I put my former husband on Notice. Sent him a note telling him that I did not want any further contact. He's not "toxic", but he does my head in bigtime. Fills me with anxiety. Didn't treat me too crash hot when he was the whizz kid physicist, but now wants me to be there to listen to him. One idea being that we get back together again. N.E.V.E.R!

We have been divorced for many years and the only reason I have contact with him is for the kids sake, and in some ways feel sorry for him. He lost a very promising academic career to mental illness, and was also hounded by the Department because of his politics. However, I've put him on Notice and am proud of myself. Sick of being treated as a soft touch, and accepting of any crap dished me. It's done. I'm done. And the kids are adult now. I have no reason to be in contact. And the kids can find their own rudder. 😂

I've done a little in the garden, but am focussing more on my mental recovery. Feel now that I will never drink again. Alcohol no longer entices me. Thoughts may arise, but quickly dissipate. Old learning response I guess. Yay, I've made it half way. Or so I believe. Always vigilant. Aware.

Again, thank you for being so patient with me. I have read all of your posts and heard the shout outs. Thank you both. I'm still here, and I'm glad you are too.

Oh, Zura, time with my old friend was pretty sad. Very sad. A really great musician cut down with crap autoimmune disease which has made it impossible for her to play guitar, or piano. Poor thing even bought a theremin, because you don't have to touch with your hands. They're fun by the way. Even I can play.

She is in much pain and self medicating with opioid analgesics, SSRI's, Valium. Outasite quantities. Really out of it, and kept "sneaking" to the kitchen to get more. Sent me some bizarre texts after I'd arrived home. I fear she will drop like a tack, and there is nothing I can do. But....I'm much better at not trying to Save the World anymore. I'll always be her friend, but not at the expense of my own head. I've pretty much always done that. Always give myself the burnt chop when serving dinner. I'm changing. Baby steps.

My love to you both, and hi to Dee. I love being sober even when life sucks.

God Bless America. ❤️ I'm talking about the people. ❤️ I hope you are safe Venus. It looks scary from down here.

And I'll have to change me profile as far as cigarettes go Zura. Picked up again. Keep trying.

Dee74

They're cracking down on opiods from June apparently, Steely.

It's a bugger for me because it means I have to find another pain relief for those impossible days, but I use them so sparingly anyway, I'll find something with the docs help.

I did wonder how people with specific kinds of chronic pain like your friend will get on.

I can see both both sides.

D

Steely

So do I Dee, and think it wrong that people who have been (legitimately) using these drugs are 'cut off' without support. Maybe even without taper. 😭 The stroke of a pen. "Goodbye, and close the door behind you."

And those who have been using them "illegally" should be treated medically. Compassion, care. It's medical, not moral. We know this.

I'm hoping not all doctors will behave this way, but so often I see (opioid 'crisis' in America) doctors simply saving their own hides without thought to the suffering of the patient. Leaves the field wide open to black market, crime, DV, and so on. Death for some. Suicide. And I don't think I'm overstating.

I wish the world would get its act together. I mean, we did, why not the rest of them?

Zura

Great to see you back Steely and so glad to hear your feeling better. Sorry to hear about your friend, that is heartbreaking.

Dee74

Agreed on all counts Steely.

D

venuscat

Cracking down sounds good, but why would they not be prescribing them to people (such as yourself) with chronic pain.....people who have never abused them?

Very interesting for me an a whole other level as my older sister has a serious Tramadol addiction.
Might be part of the reason she has gone quiet re communicating with me at the moment.

Steely love....you write so beautifully. You could do it professionally I think.
I missed you a lot....feel so much happier now....and well done you on going no contact with your ex.
And for working through all of the stuff you have been working through.

And thank you so much for thinking of me and asking how I am.

Not good. At all. This is completely bloody terrifying.
100 000 Americans dead as of yesterday.
No end in sight.
And everything opened up again.....just big fat sigh.
Very very hard to not be depressed.

Zura love.....I looked up the avocado thing....I am going to try it....would you like to join me?

venuscat

Oh.....it doesn't bare fruit, just makes a cute houseplant.
Oh well. s