Class of July 2013 Part 55
Magsie
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 26,810
Lulu, your daughter has got a really strong link which is keeping her with her bf, it seems. Our minds are complex things and we can’t always explain our actions. being at home with you may help her make decisions.
Hope you managed to keep awake at work love xx
Hope you managed to keep awake at work love xx
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Australia
Posts: 11,352
Hi guys
Home now. Been on IV abs all night. They did a culture, flush.
Got home and googled Nf.
I feel lucky and blessed. Now to sleep.
Always thinking of you guys and i think 2019 is going to be a good year for all of us.
Much love xoxo
Home now. Been on IV abs all night. They did a culture, flush.
Got home and googled Nf.
I feel lucky and blessed. Now to sleep.
Always thinking of you guys and i think 2019 is going to be a good year for all of us.
Much love xoxo
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 807
Hi all, I too hope you all had a lovely weekend. Snooz, I hope your Mum is feeling better!
I know I am doing a lot of complaining and I apologize but here I go again. The pain in my legs from my back problems has gotten exponentially worse. I can literally never sleep. I don't think it helped that my dog of 95 pounds bolted after a squirrel while on the leash and caught me off guard. At any rate I feel like I am losing my mind. I honestly don't know how anyone lives this way. I can handle the pain as I have lived with some sort of pain for the last 35 years or so but the sleep deprivation is unbearable. I am thankful for the bumper to bumper traffic to and from work because I don't think I should be driving. As you know, I have fallen asleep at work several times. The most recent time was in a webinar with my boss. We were evaluating a data integration system and I was asked a question, I heard my name and the words "disease management" and gave some non-sensical answer. It has gotten so bad that I am having thoughts of drinking. Not for the usual reasons but I know if I drank enough I would pass out. I know that would not be good or restful sleep but it still sounds very appealing. I emailed the spinal surgeon today and said I was ready to seriously consider surgery. He wrote back that he really did not think it would be successful and might actually make things worse. What am I supposed to do? I have an appointment with a pain specialist on Friday and the surgeon said to keep that appointment and then we will chat again. I appreciate the surgeon not just cutting because he can but I am truly at the end of my rope. The thought of living the rest of my life this way does not even interest me, I have had some crazy thoughts.
Again, I'm sorry. I know there are many people with bigger problems than mine. I just really needed to vent and let you know that drinking has crossed my mind. I won't, at least not today. Thank you for reading!
I know I am doing a lot of complaining and I apologize but here I go again. The pain in my legs from my back problems has gotten exponentially worse. I can literally never sleep. I don't think it helped that my dog of 95 pounds bolted after a squirrel while on the leash and caught me off guard. At any rate I feel like I am losing my mind. I honestly don't know how anyone lives this way. I can handle the pain as I have lived with some sort of pain for the last 35 years or so but the sleep deprivation is unbearable. I am thankful for the bumper to bumper traffic to and from work because I don't think I should be driving. As you know, I have fallen asleep at work several times. The most recent time was in a webinar with my boss. We were evaluating a data integration system and I was asked a question, I heard my name and the words "disease management" and gave some non-sensical answer. It has gotten so bad that I am having thoughts of drinking. Not for the usual reasons but I know if I drank enough I would pass out. I know that would not be good or restful sleep but it still sounds very appealing. I emailed the spinal surgeon today and said I was ready to seriously consider surgery. He wrote back that he really did not think it would be successful and might actually make things worse. What am I supposed to do? I have an appointment with a pain specialist on Friday and the surgeon said to keep that appointment and then we will chat again. I appreciate the surgeon not just cutting because he can but I am truly at the end of my rope. The thought of living the rest of my life this way does not even interest me, I have had some crazy thoughts.
Again, I'm sorry. I know there are many people with bigger problems than mine. I just really needed to vent and let you know that drinking has crossed my mind. I won't, at least not today. Thank you for reading!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 807
I like to believe I have a very high pain tolerance. The first time I blew out a disc in my back I was 26 so I have been living with pain for almost 30 years. The not being able to sleep from the pain is the worst. Every aspect of my life is suffering. I am so tired. I am cranky, irritable and downright mean sometimes. My job performance is suffering. It really is like torture. I have seriously considered buying an expensive recliner and trying to sleep sitting up. If my legs are down the pain is bearable. Unfortunately money is tight between my medical bills and my Newfoundland's meds which are running about $400 per month. It is like having another car payment. I am happy she is doing well but the additional cash outlay each month is getting more and more worrisome. Sometimes the crazy thoughts that go through my head at night scare me. The world is a lonely and dark place at 3 A.M..
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
