Dee74

last part here:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...t-35-a-20.html

D

venuscat

Thank you Dee. ♥

Hmm Leshar, I think the port situation is a bit of a tricky one....it probably seems completely appropriate to people who are normies. I think I would just take in some cranberry juice or something and offer an alternative. I bet you are not the only one who would prefer there to be no alcohol during rehearsals. ♥

Croissant

Can't wait for updates on your trip, Suze! Haha, if you even have time.

When do you get back?

Funny, outside a mynah bird is chirping. Their chirping can be a bit relentless to me, but it's funny.....at the peak of my drinking before I first tried giving up in July 2013, there was damn mynah birds that would chirp directly outside my bedroom window.

When I hear them now, I could close my eyes and feel the shame of laying there sick as my day wasted away on the weeknd. Knowing the only urge to get up and buy more alcohol would be the only thing to motivate me to move. I was on a six figure salary, but hadn't managed to get myself organised enough to even buy a new bed in the place I had lived in for nearly two years. That's how little motivation I had to do anything else on the weekend but drink.

It's shocking to me how bad I got. Thankful for the small mercy I was away from my family and my children only saw slight glimpses in the really bad decline.

So grateful to be off the rat on the wheel feeling of it never ending. And lord, that feeling of emptiness, and "how do I fill my time" thoughts in those first few days, weeks and months of giving sobriety my first shot.

Thankful I've had companions along the way here. I don't know how I would have made it out alone. It scares me when I think of who I was then.

venuscat

It scares me just reading that Crois ~ and I thank God you are not in that place anymore. You have so much to give the world.

I am not OK today.....really really rough day. So I'll try and get back to chirpy-with-details tomorrow. ♥

SnoozyQ

Nawww Venus hope you cheer up soon sweetie.
How exciting that you are leaving next Thursday , you must message us all about your trip so we can live it vicariously through you

Crois , I know what you mean when it scares you about how bad you got . Some days I just cringe at where I could have ended up !

Leshar you are going to knockem dead girlfriend . I bet you will be the star of the show. Wouldn't it be great if we could see snippets ,

Bob, Wolfy,Ladybug,Dee, Gilmer , Pete & everyone , hope you are all doing great xoxix

Luvya xx.

Croissant

Oh no, V. Hmmm, please rest and try to meditate on good thoughts to open up to healing. I guess maybe you don't want to talk about it, perhaps it's the meds knocking you round a bit?

Thanks for appreciating I made it through the bad stuff, I'm glad we are all here, and you too Snooz, that last scare of yours petrified me, as I'm sure it does you with sober hindsight. Scary how our AV doesn't want us to see a way out.

Leshar, I hope your bro does mention the play, but do you talk about these things to him? Anyway, I hope you find the visit satisfying on some levels. Virtual hugs to Tiki, may he be ok where he is for the time being.

Thinking of LB, hoping she's ok.

venuscat

You are so wise dearest Crois....

And yes, every day I am grateful that we have our beautiful Snooz with us....I was scared as well.

I do want to talk about it, and I am whinging my heart out in my thread.
I feel bad going me me me all over the show.... ♥

Croissant

Ugggh, I just read all the stuff going on.

Do you have a rental tenancies auth there that monitor bad landlords? Defs make a note of everything that happened with this incident. The reality is, it is still classed as your home. For someone to come in and be abusive to you in it is unacceptable.

It must have been really unsettling for you to go so far as to ring the cops.

Have you sorted a lift for tomorrow?

Dee74

They would definitely not get away with any of that in Qld Suze.
I'm not sure what the law is Victoria tho.

tenants union of victoria - Tenants Union of Victoria

don't think of it as making trouble to look into this - think of it as standing up for your rights

D

venuscat

Thank you Dee ~ that's four threads I've whined in today....I appreciate your advice. That's the first thing I did actually, because you gave me that advice last time.

As it currently stands, I have made it clear to my personal real estate agent (not the guy who abused me) that abusing your clients is not OK or lawful, and that I called the police.

I need to take the other advice you gave me, and not let everything that is going on right now ruin things for me. I am under strict instructions to relax tonight, and that is what I am going to do. I hope.

venuscat

And......another huge Congrats on 9 and a half years....just wow. ♥

SnoozyQ

Bloody hell Suze! How dare he abuse you. It says more about him than it does you.

Do not let this ruin your excitement about you upcoming holiday .

He is nothing but a bully! Bullies stink !

I'm sending you a big virtual hug darling one

Dee74

oh thanks Suze - I wondered who had nine and a half years there for a minute

D

venuscat

^^^

venuscat

Thank you my love. ♥

Croissant

Yes, don't let yourself get sucked into a vortex of poo just becasue its all going on around you, V. (Ban pun, but it was the first thing that came to mind.)

My son once had a man lose his potatoes at a work site at everyone and was renowned for being an absolute you know what. Well, he only did it so many times and literally dropped dead the day after his last angry outburst.

I think getting sober does give us the skills (when we remember to use them, lol) to cope better than the average adult with difficult situations. You can do this, you really can!

venuscat

Thank you.....I'm just so tired. So vulnerable right now....I know it's partially the horse meds I'm on...you have no idea how much I appreciate and need all of your love and care. ♥

And vortex of poo is fantastic.

venuscat

Guess who has a brand new cistern? Yey.

Croissant

Awesome. Did everyone settle down?

venuscat

I know I settled down.
Plus I had my little surgical procedure this morning so that's good.

How are all of the wonderful Julyers today??