One Year & Over Part 38
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: PA and Florida
Posts: 4,189
Good Morning, Overs;
Mags, that final thought of yours says it all....positive thinking, indeed! Reminds me...
I was feeling a resentment towards my ex the night before the recent grad ceremony that I attended for my youngest. In fact, as I was driving to my hotel I thought back to the night before my oldest's grad from law school some years back when I tied one on. The drinking thought was fleeting and had no teeth...but, it surfaced, albeit weak.
Anyway, I have spent nearly three years working hard on recovery, and, in truth, I felt empowered by the toolbox I brought with me. My first step was to continue to remind myself that this weekend wasn't about me. I can still get egocentric...in a heartbeat, but, hard work on humility and gratitude have created a filter to help in times just like that.
I woke up early...had Starbucks #1, then headed off to the hotel gym for a workout - keeping me out of my own way. Next was Starbucks #2 as I headed off to a meeting in Ohio. I followed the rule book - have something bothering you - head to a meeting and you will probs find a solution, or, at least, comfort.
Well, yes, it happened...almost out of the gate. I can't remember the topic, or anything at all except this one share. It was EXACTLY what I needed to hear....
Guy says, "I still have some problems today, but, they are nothing compared to the problems that I faced in active addiction." BAM, a calmness came over me and the resentment became a whisper between my ears - at most...as I proceeded to have an amazing time in celebration of my baby girl.
Well said, Mags... are sober now, and ready for life on life's terms.
Sending positive vibes your way about the meeting.
On the picking up where you would have been vs where you left off aspect. I was back in the grips of my addiction within a few months and I think I was trying to drink all the drinks I missed in those 11 plus years...my obsession was all encompassing. Drinking or not - all I could think about was my next drink - even if I had a drink in my hands. PROGRESSION - NO REMISSION.
Gotts to boogie....best to all today.
Carlos
Originally Posted by Mags1 
I have to be grateful for he fact I will be going in the meeting sober! No hangovers, red face etc. So grateful for that.
I was feeling a resentment towards my ex the night before the recent grad ceremony that I attended for my youngest. In fact, as I was driving to my hotel I thought back to the night before my oldest's grad from law school some years back when I tied one on. The drinking thought was fleeting and had no teeth...but, it surfaced, albeit weak.
Anyway, I have spent nearly three years working hard on recovery, and, in truth, I felt empowered by the toolbox I brought with me. My first step was to continue to remind myself that this weekend wasn't about me. I can still get egocentric...in a heartbeat, but, hard work on humility and gratitude have created a filter to help in times just like that.
I woke up early...had Starbucks #1, then headed off to the hotel gym for a workout - keeping me out of my own way. Next was Starbucks #2 as I headed off to a meeting in Ohio. I followed the rule book - have something bothering you - head to a meeting and you will probs find a solution, or, at least, comfort.
Well, yes, it happened...almost out of the gate. I can't remember the topic, or anything at all except this one share. It was EXACTLY what I needed to hear....
Guy says, "I still have some problems today, but, they are nothing compared to the problems that I faced in active addiction." BAM, a calmness came over me and the resentment became a whisper between my ears - at most...as I proceeded to have an amazing time in celebration of my baby girl.
Well said, Mags... are sober now, and ready for life on life's terms.
Sending positive vibes your way about the meeting.
On the picking up where you would have been vs where you left off aspect. I was back in the grips of my addiction within a few months and I think I was trying to drink all the drinks I missed in those 11 plus years...my obsession was all encompassing. Drinking or not - all I could think about was my next drink - even if I had a drink in my hands. PROGRESSION - NO REMISSION.
Gotts to boogie....best to all today.
Carlos
Magsie
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 26,799
Evening overs
Well, I had my meeting with the boss and I was asked if I would be interested in another job on site but different area. I was interested and he is arranging an interview for me. If I don't like this there is an opportunity in another department also. So I'm happy. Thanks overs for your support!
Well, I had my meeting with the boss and I was asked if I would be interested in another job on site but different area. I was interested and he is arranging an interview for me. If I don't like this there is an opportunity in another department also. So I'm happy. Thanks overs for your support!
Do your best
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,046
That's good news Mags x
Finished painting the garden furniture just got to do the windows & buy new wood for the path & were done in the garden posted more pics in my album oh & I'm the second phase of building my birdtable it's painted il be finishing the stand tonight inside as rain is on the way tomorrow but it looks like it will rain tonight everything is bone dry so should be good i can't wait to have a hot bath soon
Finished painting the garden furniture just got to do the windows & buy new wood for the path & were done in the garden posted more pics in my album oh & I'm the second phase of building my birdtable it's painted il be finishing the stand tonight inside as rain is on the way tomorrow but it looks like it will rain tonight everything is bone dry so should be good i can't wait to have a hot bath soon
Quit 4/17/15
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Pa
Posts: 15,233
Originally Posted by InParticular
I never want to be back where I was before I quit. It was hopeless hell. At least now I have power to choose, before I was just a slave, working and living to drink.
Congrats on deciding to go back to school!
Re-Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Colorado Springs, Colorado
Posts: 7,583
Hey all!
Glad it worked out for you Mags. Does "tupee me off" mean to lay you off?
RZ, 'Sup with the oldtimer's disease?
Wolf you have a way with your place.
FBL, it is what it is. I am OK and in no danger of drinking. Strangling a niece and braining a SIL, sure. Disowning a maniacal grand daughter, done. These leeches need us to play their silly games and we don't. Sober I can deal with the stress, instead of drinking it into worse when the alcohol wears off because I didn't take action in a timely manner. We'll get through it eventually and get the best revenge, we will live as well as always. As will they.
It is so relaxing to come here to friends who've been there and back too. Sorry about the rant.
Glad it worked out for you Mags. Does "tupee me off" mean to lay you off?
RZ, 'Sup with the oldtimer's disease?
Wolf you have a way with your place.
FBL, it is what it is. I am OK and in no danger of drinking. Strangling a niece and braining a SIL, sure. Disowning a maniacal grand daughter, done. These leeches need us to play their silly games and we don't. Sober I can deal with the stress, instead of drinking it into worse when the alcohol wears off because I didn't take action in a timely manner. We'll get through it eventually and get the best revenge, we will live as well as always. As will they.
It is so relaxing to come here to friends who've been there and back too. Sorry about the rant.
Quit 4/17/15
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Pa
Posts: 15,233
Sorry the in laws needed police intervention Itchy. I imagine that would be a huge incentive to drink for me. Glad you could handle that soberly. Good luck in the future. In laws are often the unwanted dowry brought by a spouse to a marriage.
Have a great day everyone!
Have a great day everyone!
Living and Loving Life at Last
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: gods own country
Posts: 12,186
Hey folks I seem to always have so much catching up to do here! I have time to post today because I took a day off work. No, not a duvet day, and I didn't exactly 'throw a sickie'. My chest & throat are still giving me grief, but Monday night I also started with a sore eye. Woke up yesterday with my lids glued together & my eyes swollen almost shut. I have viral conjunctivitis. (Pink eye) I now resemble an extra from 'The Walking Dead. Because of the swollen lids, I am constantly having to force my eyes open. It's amazing how tiring ( and tiresome) it gets. So today, guilty as I feel letting down my co-workers, I am staying home and recuperating. Hopefully back to - well, obviously not normal I mean, who does that?- being me!
Itchy I do surprise myself! The other day, I wanted to check something in a previous book as I have certain continuity of characters in this book. As I was reading through looking for the relevant section, I thought 'ef me, this is actually pretty good'!
Sorry you are having family troubles, but good to hear you are managing them so well in your sobriety. I agree that alcohol just fuels the drama.
FBL the book is going great ( see above!) I need to go back and redo parts of it and tie other sections together, because this one strangely I wrote in disjointed sections, as certain scenes came to me. I've never done that before, I guess it's just how this one is going. The problem I am finding with that is by the time I come to the scene I wrote earlier, there have been character or plot developments that have affected how the scene would go. Maybe another time I just need to loosely plot it.
Part of the issue is I like to write on both my laptop and my iPad, and find problems linking together. I use gdrive but have lost sections or edits in the switch somehow, so I don't trust it totally.
Wolfie, when you are done there, you and Mrs Wolfie definitely need a working Scottish holiday. I have all the gardening tools and paintbrushes you could ever need.....
Mags, good to hear you have work options, and are happy with them.
Zip, how did it go when you went back? Or did you forget???
Carlos, glad to hear you are fully recovered. It is difficult to let go past anger and bitterness when we haven't had the opportunity to express it. Especially as sometimes the emotion is more about our own inability to deal with things that happened. I know, looking back, that I made mistakes in how I made the break with my alcoholic exh, but at the time, I was dealing with my own emotions and grief over the ending of a marriage. He carried his bitterness toward me to the end, even knowing he brought it on himself. I still have anger and bitterness toward him, but ranting over his grave would not make any difference now. We live, we deal. And sober, we live and deal, so very much easier.
IP, it is never too late to return to education whether for personal fulfilment or to improve job opportunities. We should never stop wanting to improve ourselves, it is all a part of the continuing growth that separates us from our baser instincts.
VC, lessons hard won are the best learned and least repeated. Knowing what you know now after your lapse, you won't give AV another chance. And it is true that we do our best growing in the face of adversity. An easy life teaches us nothing, fighting battles teaches us everything. It teaches us how to ensure we don't lose that way next time, it teaches us that we can survive most things, it teaches us that surviving gives us another tomorrow to work on.
Okay plebs, all y'all have a Happy Hump Day!
Julie?........
Itchy I do surprise myself! The other day, I wanted to check something in a previous book as I have certain continuity of characters in this book. As I was reading through looking for the relevant section, I thought 'ef me, this is actually pretty good'!
Sorry you are having family troubles, but good to hear you are managing them so well in your sobriety. I agree that alcohol just fuels the drama.
FBL the book is going great ( see above!) I need to go back and redo parts of it and tie other sections together, because this one strangely I wrote in disjointed sections, as certain scenes came to me. I've never done that before, I guess it's just how this one is going. The problem I am finding with that is by the time I come to the scene I wrote earlier, there have been character or plot developments that have affected how the scene would go. Maybe another time I just need to loosely plot it.
Part of the issue is I like to write on both my laptop and my iPad, and find problems linking together. I use gdrive but have lost sections or edits in the switch somehow, so I don't trust it totally.
Wolfie, when you are done there, you and Mrs Wolfie definitely need a working Scottish holiday. I have all the gardening tools and paintbrushes you could ever need.....
Mags, good to hear you have work options, and are happy with them.
Zip, how did it go when you went back? Or did you forget???
Carlos, glad to hear you are fully recovered. It is difficult to let go past anger and bitterness when we haven't had the opportunity to express it. Especially as sometimes the emotion is more about our own inability to deal with things that happened. I know, looking back, that I made mistakes in how I made the break with my alcoholic exh, but at the time, I was dealing with my own emotions and grief over the ending of a marriage. He carried his bitterness toward me to the end, even knowing he brought it on himself. I still have anger and bitterness toward him, but ranting over his grave would not make any difference now. We live, we deal. And sober, we live and deal, so very much easier.
IP, it is never too late to return to education whether for personal fulfilment or to improve job opportunities. We should never stop wanting to improve ourselves, it is all a part of the continuing growth that separates us from our baser instincts.
VC, lessons hard won are the best learned and least repeated. Knowing what you know now after your lapse, you won't give AV another chance. And it is true that we do our best growing in the face of adversity. An easy life teaches us nothing, fighting battles teaches us everything. It teaches us how to ensure we don't lose that way next time, it teaches us that we can survive most things, it teaches us that surviving gives us another tomorrow to work on.
Okay plebs, all y'all have a Happy Hump Day!
Julie?........
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