Class of January 2014 Part 6
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Australia
Posts: 643
Hi everyone, need to be honest with all my SR friends and tell you after 37 days sober, last night I slipped and drank. I wasn't drunk but just wanted some relief from the anxiety that has been dogging me. Gee, what a surprise it didn't help! I slept terribly, my body temperature was thru the roof and I woke up with a headache after 3 glasses of wine.
The first thing I wanted to do when I woke up was talk to all you guys as in all honesty, S R is what has made the difference this time and totally changed my outlook. I am not going to beat myself up like I usually do. I have made an appointment to see my dr next week re my anxiety worsening. Saying thank you to all of you for your support doesn't seem enough, but i know with your help I WILL conquer this monkey on my back once and for all. Now I will go and meditate before I start my day. Thank you friends for listening x
The first thing I wanted to do when I woke up was talk to all you guys as in all honesty, S R is what has made the difference this time and totally changed my outlook. I am not going to beat myself up like I usually do. I have made an appointment to see my dr next week re my anxiety worsening. Saying thank you to all of you for your support doesn't seem enough, but i know with your help I WILL conquer this monkey on my back once and for all. Now I will go and meditate before I start my day. Thank you friends for listening x
Autobrew Anon Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 599
Sending hugs....
GCG you shouldn't be hard on yourself. Glad you are still around - at least it was 3 glasses and not a whole bottle and you didn't let a slip turn into a landslide
Kiya I understand how you feel.... I guess at times I get frustrated that not drinking isn't a big bright sparkly day at the beach. I forget my life is still going on -- just having to use different tools to deal with it. Sometimes the same old same old isn't comforting but plain boring. I hope your workout helps.
GCG you shouldn't be hard on yourself. Glad you are still around - at least it was 3 glasses and not a whole bottle and you didn't let a slip turn into a landslide
Kiya I understand how you feel.... I guess at times I get frustrated that not drinking isn't a big bright sparkly day at the beach. I forget my life is still going on -- just having to use different tools to deal with it. Sometimes the same old same old isn't comforting but plain boring. I hope your workout helps.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: New England, USA
Posts: 3,960
GCG - Sorry to hear about your slip up, but glad you chose to come back to is instead of the wine. That takes a lot of strength on your part. Smart idea to address your needs by booking the doctor appointment. You are on the right track.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: US
Posts: 556
GCG - I'm sorry to hear it because i know you are disappointed today, but I know you can keep on keeping on and get passed this. Anxiety that builds and builds and builds is a killer - we need a strategy because we are just so wired to drink under pressure. I read a really good article that's making the rounds on FB about the neurological basis of addiction - it made me realize just how much we are up against and how we have to throw every damn thing including the kitchen sink at it.
Stay with us and we'll help lift the kitchen sink.
Stay with us and we'll help lift the kitchen sink.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: US
Posts: 556
Life is strange.
I was up until 3:30 a.m. working while tending to a vomiting kid - a pivotal meeting set at 9am and nowhere near prepared. Driving home yesterday listening to my audiobook (Drink: The intimate relationship of Women and Alcohol) and I found the horror stories starting to have a perverse appeal - despite the disastrous consequences, the escape started to sound good. Sometimes I think I'm simply addicted to oblivion. I know it's because I'm tired and overextended and worried. Triple threat to my sobriety. I'm on guard but also felt suddenly like I was back in a downward spiral, and very much at risk.
So i came home an put on my jammies and dealt with the sick kick and tried to give myself a crash course in long term debt and felt horrid when I got up for the day 2 hours later, got in a fight with my husband, rushed out leaving everything a mess. The dishes in the sink, the towels on the floor, my life.
I got through my meeting and decided to come home early - sent other people home - the wind and snow were coming up and schools were being closed and so I just decided for once to try to get out ahead of it. Got home and school had already been closed, husband was off to pick up kids and I surveyed the disaster house and just frantically tidied for about a half hour. Got little sickie settled in the den, ate some lunch, started the fire, made cocoa, and now here I sit, sort of working, drinking coffee watching the most amazing snow flurries out my window warm and safe with my people and feeling tired but content.
That is a reallllllly long way of saying that it's amazing to me how moments of peace and comfort and just feeling right can be around any corner - even a corner you could swear only had the next bad thing around it.
Hang in there for the next good thing. Day 39.
I was up until 3:30 a.m. working while tending to a vomiting kid - a pivotal meeting set at 9am and nowhere near prepared. Driving home yesterday listening to my audiobook (Drink: The intimate relationship of Women and Alcohol) and I found the horror stories starting to have a perverse appeal - despite the disastrous consequences, the escape started to sound good. Sometimes I think I'm simply addicted to oblivion. I know it's because I'm tired and overextended and worried. Triple threat to my sobriety. I'm on guard but also felt suddenly like I was back in a downward spiral, and very much at risk.
So i came home an put on my jammies and dealt with the sick kick and tried to give myself a crash course in long term debt and felt horrid when I got up for the day 2 hours later, got in a fight with my husband, rushed out leaving everything a mess. The dishes in the sink, the towels on the floor, my life.
I got through my meeting and decided to come home early - sent other people home - the wind and snow were coming up and schools were being closed and so I just decided for once to try to get out ahead of it. Got home and school had already been closed, husband was off to pick up kids and I surveyed the disaster house and just frantically tidied for about a half hour. Got little sickie settled in the den, ate some lunch, started the fire, made cocoa, and now here I sit, sort of working, drinking coffee watching the most amazing snow flurries out my window warm and safe with my people and feeling tired but content.
That is a reallllllly long way of saying that it's amazing to me how moments of peace and comfort and just feeling right can be around any corner - even a corner you could swear only had the next bad thing around it.
Hang in there for the next good thing. Day 39.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 539
Originally Posted by adee 
That is a reallllllly long way of saying that it's amazing to me how moments of peace and comfort and just feeling right can be around any corner - even a corner you could swear only had the next bad thing around it.
Hang in there for the next good thing. Day 39.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: California
Posts: 2,643
I too am glad that you jumped back on SR, GCG. Hopefully, the doctor will be able to prescribe something that will help you through recovery. We have enough to deal with already! Chin up and keep moving forward.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 406
9 pm eastern I'm getting close to turning off the tv and electronics for the night. Spend some time just relaxing with the wife. I went to the gym for a while, spend about 75 minutes between the bike, elliptical and treadmill. I'll be sore tomorrow but I'm in a better frame of mind right now. It took more will power than I would care to admit driving past the bar on the way to the gym. I wanted to badly to stop there and just call it a night. I got through though and I feel better for it.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: California
Posts: 2,643
Having racing thoughts last night and this morning was somewhat unsettling for me, but no cravings thank goodness. Bad day today, anything and everything seemed to go wrong! Got a virus on my computer at work, IT is offsite so won't be able to fix it until next week. The office loaner wouldn't connect to the printer, keyboard or my second monitor. I keep having a reoccurring issue with my car (from an accident in December), so I had to take it back to the shop again. Got through the day, jumped into my pjs and here I am. The good thing is that none of this triggered a craving.
Hang in there everyone, looks like we are in for a bumpy ride for a while, but it will smooth out eventually.
Hang in there everyone, looks like we are in for a bumpy ride for a while, but it will smooth out eventually.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 465
Congratulations from me too Arctic! Great job on 30 days!!
Welcome to all the new members of the January class, and a special welcome to all who have recommitted! My best to each and every one of you.
Odelle, sounds like it's been a trying day, but good for you snuggling up in your pj's and taking some me time. We must remember to care for ourselves by caring for ourselves.
Best to all today!!
Much love,
MV
Welcome to all the new members of the January class, and a special welcome to all who have recommitted!
My best to each and every one of you. Odelle, sounds like it's been a trying day, but good for you snuggling up in your pj's and taking some me time. We must remember to care for ourselves by caring for ourselves.
Best to all today!!
Much love,
MV
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: South Alabama
Posts: 40
Wow, so many milestones here in our January class!!! 
Proud to be part of it, I am at 34 days.
My word this week is intentional. I am focusing on being intentional in my relationships, time, work, conversations, etc.
Been through a very tough time this week. I got a call from my son's school around noon that I needed to come right away, as he needed to go to the hospital. He is 12. He was admitted into the hospital and will be there a minimum of 7-10 days. I can't visit him because he is in quarantine.
35 days ago I would have been drunk at noon....the thoughts of this scare the crap out of me. Thank you God for my sobriety! I can say with confidence that my sobriety has made me a greater Mom, a really good one, even!
So all the Mom's in the class don't get sad, I can tell you my son is loving the hospital. Lol. He is very optimistic and happy. He told me on the phone he would like to stay there for a while, as he doesn't have to do chores and the food is amazing! Lol. That's my boy!
Anyway, prayers for our family are appreciated. His little sister (6 years) misses her brother dearly and is really struggling without him. Thank you SR family, I am blessed to have you
Proud to be part of it, I am at 34 days.
My word this week is intentional. I am focusing on being intentional in my relationships, time, work, conversations, etc.
Been through a very tough time this week. I got a call from my son's school around noon that I needed to come right away, as he needed to go to the hospital. He is 12. He was admitted into the hospital and will be there a minimum of 7-10 days. I can't visit him because he is in quarantine.
35 days ago I would have been drunk at noon....the thoughts of this scare the crap out of me. Thank you God for my sobriety! I can say with confidence that my sobriety has made me a greater Mom, a really good one, even!
So all the Mom's in the class don't get sad, I can tell you my son is loving the hospital. Lol. He is very optimistic and happy. He told me on the phone he would like to stay there for a while, as he doesn't have to do chores and the food is amazing! Lol. That's my boy!
Anyway, prayers for our family are appreciated. His little sister (6 years) misses her brother dearly and is really struggling without him. Thank you SR family, I am blessed to have you
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 37
I didn't post yesterday after what was a fairly positive but neutral day.
This morning I have just read the page 10 results and feel a little overwhelmed. So many difficult days out there for individuals who have a real determination to stay sober, it just shows how it gets to us all.
Sunnysideup, I hope your son is ok, the admission that 35 days ago you would have been drinking when it was all happening is really brave in my view.
GCG please don't blame yourselves but stay positive. I think many of us realise how we have to think ahead and almost plan the avoidance of alcohol but there are always going to be times when we are really tested.
Waking up on day 25. The numerical significance has come back to me. A quarter of a hundred days.
Take care all.
This morning I have just read the page 10 results and feel a little overwhelmed. So many difficult days out there for individuals who have a real determination to stay sober, it just shows how it gets to us all.
Sunnysideup, I hope your son is ok, the admission that 35 days ago you would have been drinking when it was all happening is really brave in my view.
GCG please don't blame yourselves but stay positive. I think many of us realise how we have to think ahead and almost plan the avoidance of alcohol but there are always going to be times when we are really tested.
Waking up on day 25. The numerical significance has come back to me. A quarter of a hundred days.
Take care all.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
