Class of January 2014 Part 5
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 366
So I slipped up last Saturday. Decided not to go to the party with the open bar...but still managed to slip anyway. I decided to have ONE margarita...so I had FOUR. Whatever. Only an idiot (or an alcoholic talking to themselves) couldn't see that one coming.
I know why it happened too (long story). I did have a plan. I left the house. I went for a walk. I left the house again. I went for coffee. I took a guitar lesson. And then I still had FOUR margaritas.
I'm working on an improved plan for the future.
Back to day 5.
Walking home from work tonight I was thinking about how sad my boss seemed today. My brain immediately thought "I should invite her over for a glass of wine".
Stupid brain.
There are actually TWO things very wrong with my thinking:
1) obviously the drinking thing. My brain will twist anything around to make it feel like a glass of wine is a good thing. ..that whole "I'm just thinking about my poor boss" utter bullsh#t.
But there is a second thing really wrong with my thinking...
2) It's not my job to fix other people. I've got to learn to let go of this responsibility. It's so enabling. Its clearly meant to be distracting.
No...It's time for me to work on me....
I know why it happened too (long story). I did have a plan. I left the house. I went for a walk. I left the house again. I went for coffee. I took a guitar lesson. And then I still had FOUR margaritas.
I'm working on an improved plan for the future.
Back to day 5.
Walking home from work tonight I was thinking about how sad my boss seemed today. My brain immediately thought "I should invite her over for a glass of wine".
Stupid brain.
There are actually TWO things very wrong with my thinking:
1) obviously the drinking thing. My brain will twist anything around to make it feel like a glass of wine is a good thing. ..that whole "I'm just thinking about my poor boss" utter bullsh#t.
But there is a second thing really wrong with my thinking...
2) It's not my job to fix other people. I've got to learn to let go of this responsibility. It's so enabling. Its clearly meant to be distracting.
No...It's time for me to work on me....
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 20
Arctic SA - great idea!
- I'm thankful for my wonderful family, husband and 3 little ones. It's been awesome playing with them, listening to their cute funny stories, sharing the cuddle time, smelling their clean skin, and playing with them without wondering 'can I have a glass of wine yet?'
- I'm thankful for being able to FEEL my feelings and not suppress or mask them. I've feel elation, relief, anger, frustration, worry and sorrow this month. Perfectly normal.
- I'm thankful I've been able to participate in new social events this month.
-I'm thankful I've woken up every morning rested and refreshed.
Thank you God, SR, and my J14 class!
- I'm thankful for my wonderful family, husband and 3 little ones. It's been awesome playing with them, listening to their cute funny stories, sharing the cuddle time, smelling their clean skin, and playing with them without wondering 'can I have a glass of wine yet?'
- I'm thankful for being able to FEEL my feelings and not suppress or mask them. I've feel elation, relief, anger, frustration, worry and sorrow this month. Perfectly normal.
- I'm thankful I've been able to participate in new social events this month.
-I'm thankful I've woken up every morning rested and refreshed.
Thank you God, SR, and my J14 class!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 47
Day 3 for me. I have to say that reading all these posts hammered in my decision that I am done this time. It's come down to get sober or die! This is a great source of support for me and just wanted to introduce myself and say thank you everybody for your honesty and sharing your story. I feel hopeful this time that I can stay sober for life.
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Sent from my iPhone using SoberRecovery
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Australia
Posts: 643
Welcome back Milly and welcome Sunflower!
Milly maybe this sense of having to fix people is a common theme - I do that all the time. I see someone suffering or needing help and I instantly put my hand to help up even though I didn't help myself until now and don't really have the energy to help anyone else. I don't even think when I do it. I did it again today when I met a friend who is having issues, I go on autopilot - what the hell is wrong with me?! It is my sense of what people think of me I wonder? I just need to stop thinking I can fix everyone who is broken - the silly thing is I am aware of it and still do it. The sad thing is though that no-one did it for me ...
Milly maybe this sense of having to fix people is a common theme - I do that all the time. I see someone suffering or needing help and I instantly put my hand to help up even though I didn't help myself until now and don't really have the energy to help anyone else. I don't even think when I do it. I did it again today when I met a friend who is having issues, I go on autopilot - what the hell is wrong with me?! It is my sense of what people think of me I wonder? I just need to stop thinking I can fix everyone who is broken - the silly thing is I am aware of it and still do it. The sad thing is though that no-one did it for me ...
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: California
Posts: 2,643
Good evening everyone, it took me a long time to catch up on this thread but I am glad to see so many hanging on to their sobriety. It’s also great to see those who have slipped jumping right back on board!
Today has been a very low energy day for me, but fortunately, the good days outweigh the bad ones.
On gratitude, one thing that I noticed early on is the ability to stand straight in the shower in the morning, without having to lean against the shower wall. To feel alert and vital in the morning is something I’ll never grow tired of.
Today has been a very low energy day for me, but fortunately, the good days outweigh the bad ones.
On gratitude, one thing that I noticed early on is the ability to stand straight in the shower in the morning, without having to lean against the shower wall. To feel alert and vital in the morning is something I’ll never grow tired of.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 52
Originally Posted by new star 
Hi all. My AV is back, talking to me. I dream about drinking every night. I wake up thinkig about it. Why is this happening after 4 weeks?! Thankfully I'm not physically craving it.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: US
Posts: 556
I'm grateful for having enough. Enough food, enough money, enough shelter, comfort.
Of having more than enough. More than enough love, friendship, work, forgiveness, second chances.
I'm grateful for having loved so much that the grief of loss has changed me profoundly.
I'm grateful for people to laugh with and complain with and tell my stories to every single day. I have such wonderful people in my life. My husband, my three kids, my sister, my workmates, my friends. Even on the darkest days I know that I've hit the lottery for the people who are in my life.
I'm grateful for coming here and reading all of these 30 days - congratulations everyone! I'm grateful for the day ones as well. Thanks for sharing the journey everyone.
Of having more than enough. More than enough love, friendship, work, forgiveness, second chances.
I'm grateful for having loved so much that the grief of loss has changed me profoundly.
I'm grateful for people to laugh with and complain with and tell my stories to every single day. I have such wonderful people in my life. My husband, my three kids, my sister, my workmates, my friends. Even on the darkest days I know that I've hit the lottery for the people who are in my life.
I'm grateful for coming here and reading all of these 30 days - congratulations everyone! I'm grateful for the day ones as well. Thanks for sharing the journey everyone.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 52
So there I was in the grocery store early evening to pick up a few more items for the crock pot. Brussel Sprouts (yup) and little red potatoes. Then of course I had to pick up some carbonated water. Then I walked by the beeeerrr isle. I swear the bottles and cans were whistling and yelling "Hey Old Friend whatcha doing?" I even googled the alcohol content of Bud Select 55 and 99. (I'm a drunk, what can I say) then i saw the price of that swill and came back to senses and hurried out of there! Not the best reason for not drinking but it worked that time.
Note to self: Stay the hell out of the evil beer isle!
End of day three here. I think my liver is shrinking cause I feel my back hurting more than the uncomfortable/hurting swollen liver feeling More green tea, kale veggies on tap for tomorrow-gotta keep my cleanse going till I feel better. Might even walk while the coffee is brewing tomorrow.
I hope everyone had a good day. Once again tomorrow is the first day of the rest of our lives.
Note to self: Stay the hell out of the evil beer isle!
End of day three here. I think my liver is shrinking cause I feel my back hurting more than the uncomfortable/hurting swollen liver feeling More green tea, kale veggies on tap for tomorrow-gotta keep my cleanse going till I feel better. Might even walk while the coffee is brewing tomorrow.
I hope everyone had a good day. Once again tomorrow is the first day of the rest of our lives.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 366
Originally Posted by Goldcoastgirl
Welcome back Milly and welcome Sunflower!
Milly maybe this sense of having to fix people is a common theme - I do that all the time. I see someone suffering or needing help and I instantly put my hand to help up even though I didn't help myself until now and don't really have the energy to help anyone else. I don't even think when I do it. I did it again today when I met a friend who is having issues, I go on autopilot - what the hell is wrong with me?! It is my sense of what people think of me I wonder? I just need to stop thinking I can fix everyone who is broken - the silly thing is I am aware of it and still do it. The sad thing is though that no-one did it for me ...
Milly maybe this sense of having to fix people is a common theme - I do that all the time. I see someone suffering or needing help and I instantly put my hand to help up even though I didn't help myself until now and don't really have the energy to help anyone else. I don't even think when I do it. I did it again today when I met a friend who is having issues, I go on autopilot - what the hell is wrong with me?! It is my sense of what people think of me I wonder? I just need to stop thinking I can fix everyone who is broken - the silly thing is I am aware of it and still do it. The sad thing is though that no-one did it for me ...
---
So tonight I decided to venture into the kitchen to bake. This is a potential trigger activity since baking and sipping (gulping) wine go hand and hand. I fought through the association as best I could. I was excited to make something that I didn't burn 'cause after "a few" I'd forget that it was in the oven ...or any of the other typical catastrophes that happen when baking and drinking.
I might as well been drunk. I couldn't keep my mind focused. Added too much butter...then too much flour...added water when the batter turned out too dry...and ended up drinking bowls of raw ginger snap soup - yuck! Clumsy brain must be setting in.
Oh well. At least I'm sober.
Good nite!!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Australia
Posts: 643
Milly, when I read back what I wrote it sounded like I was feeling sorry for myself, but I wasn't - exactly like you I never asked anyone for help, and everyone had this perception of me always being "so strong" that I kept that I wore that mask everyday, for years. I do wonder if that is the role as a female (sorry guys!) that we were brought up with, not to complain, not to feel sorry and to be strong for everyone else. It's way too tiring and I am giving up that role now.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Australia
Posts: 643
I got this breathing technique in an email newsletter I subscribe to by an American lady called Sonia Choquette, who some of you may have heard of. If you are feeling particularly stressed or anxious it is meant to help calm you down. Maybe this will be of help to some of you when you are dealing with a stressful situation.
Room to Breathe
Begin by noticing all the stress you are holding in your body. Feel the tension in your chest, your arms, your jaw, and around your heart and solar plexus. Next, release all this tension by exhaling as though you are blowing out a birthday candle, completely emptying your lungs as you do, until there is no air left.
Then slowly inhale through the nose clear into your solar plexus.
Once you are filled to capacity, exhale once again, this time saying, “Ahh” while opening your jaw and loosening your throat as you do.
Repeat this breath two or three times, then return to normal breathing in through the nose and out through the nose.
You can repeat to yourself, once you have returned to a normal breath, the words, “I am calm,” or "I am peaceful", until you feel calm and peaceful.
This technique does take the edge off, and works every time.
Room to Breathe
Begin by noticing all the stress you are holding in your body. Feel the tension in your chest, your arms, your jaw, and around your heart and solar plexus. Next, release all this tension by exhaling as though you are blowing out a birthday candle, completely emptying your lungs as you do, until there is no air left.
Then slowly inhale through the nose clear into your solar plexus.
Once you are filled to capacity, exhale once again, this time saying, “Ahh” while opening your jaw and loosening your throat as you do.
Repeat this breath two or three times, then return to normal breathing in through the nose and out through the nose.
You can repeat to yourself, once you have returned to a normal breath, the words, “I am calm,” or "I am peaceful", until you feel calm and peaceful.
This technique does take the edge off, and works every time.
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 699
Just checking in guys - day 10 and double digits (woohooo) - still fighting the tiredness and yesterday struggled with a trip to a petrol station where there was wine on offer everywhere but I made it. Just need to stay strong this weekend 
Hope everyone's doing ok
Hope everyone's doing ok
Autobrew Anon Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 599
Last day of our Class Month
Wow to so many of you.... some of us have really come a long way in a short time. And a lot of you have been so courageous to hang in and get back up one more time.
My month has been a struggle at times but I fear that my big struggles are ahead. It is easy for me to get some time in but as it grows, I get to feeling "I'm okay". I hope that isn't the case this time as the physical worries are scarier this time around. I know my future has the potential to be horrible if I keep drinking. I don't want to go through any bad health problems and hope that they aren't there lurking underneath the surface right now. (I am a worrywart about things like that --- made worse by living alone)
Best wishes to everyone going into February - let's all hang in there!! I hope we keep the thread alive. There are certainly enough of us to do that Thanks again for sharing - even though I don't post here every day, I most definitely come here and read every post. It's a great help to me. Hugs to each and every one of you! And welcome from me to the newcomers, I hope you stay with us too!!
Wow to so many of you.... some of us have really come a long way in a short time. And a lot of you have been so courageous to hang in and get back up one more time.
My month has been a struggle at times but I fear that my big struggles are ahead. It is easy for me to get some time in but as it grows, I get to feeling "I'm okay". I hope that isn't the case this time as the physical worries are scarier this time around. I know my future has the potential to be horrible if I keep drinking. I don't want to go through any bad health problems and hope that they aren't there lurking underneath the surface right now. (I am a worrywart about things like that --- made worse by living alone)
Best wishes to everyone going into February - let's all hang in there!! I hope we keep the thread alive. There are certainly enough of us to do that
Thanks again for sharing - even though I don't post here every day, I most definitely come here and read every post. It's a great help to me. Hugs to each and every one of you! And welcome from me to the newcomers, I hope you stay with us too!!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 406
Good morning everyone, I don't think I checked in yesterday but things are still going good for me. Sleep has gotten worse the past couple of days for whatever reason. Starting day 18 today and I sleep ok once I fall asleep. It just takes a while to get there.
Everyone take care and be safe today. As a side note January is our class and this is where most of my posting will be. But it probably wouldn't hurt any of is to spend a little time in the February thread when it's up. Both encourage them in stopping and help remind us where we were just a short time ago.
Everyone take care and be safe today. As a side note January is our class and this is where most of my posting will be. But it probably wouldn't hurt any of is to spend a little time in the February thread when it's up. Both encourage them in stopping and help remind us where we were just a short time ago.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: California
Posts: 2,643
Good morning Class. Winding down the month of January, who would have imagined, one month already! I totally relate to your concern with staying strong in the coming months, GypsyHeart, and I plan on staying close to SR. There will be ups and downs along the way, but this is my safe harbor; where I can come and read and share with other people (not just invisible peeps) who totally relate to what I am going through. Just as we have leaned on one another in early sobriety, let's keep this thread active and reach out to one another for encouragement and inspiration as we continue this journey.
Before the thread moves, one last posting of the Class of January 2014 roster follows, I hope to see you all as we push forward through the year.
1 1Trail
2 2bstrong
3 Adee
4 ApisPadre
5 Argent
6 Arjip
7 Arteh
8 ArticSA
9 Autan
10 Avra
11 BigShoe
12 Binge1989
13 Blondsober
14 Bookmaven
15 Branches
16 Briar
17 Butterfly33
18 Cairns87
19 Cara39
20 Carebearlost
21 Carlygirl
22 Cheeky1
23 Chefhunter
24 ClearMind
25 ClydeChief
26 ColoradoMan
27 Countingdays
28 CoveredInRain
29 Dancerinthedark
30 Dan Dare
31 Danthehunter
32 Dax501
33 Dbskid
34 Desertsweetpea
35 Dirk626
36 Django
37 Dj72075
38 Dorris
39 Dryingup
40 EagerforChange
41 Ed2715
42 Eldy
43 Emkay
44 Ethos23
45 Far2go
46 Finnie
47 Fishy
48 Fleuryp
49 Forabetterlife
50 ForestRunner
51 FourSeasons
52 Free2Bsober13
53 FreddyBear
54 Frugal14
55 Gatorgirl67
56 Gimliman
57 Gman13
58 Goldcoastgirl
59 Grahammt21312
60 GreenEggsAndHam
61 Grindilow
62 Grocerease
63 GypsyHeart
64 Haennie
65 Halfvictory
66 Hearts
67 HopeSho
68 Imabuleva
69 Ineedhelp123
70 IreLander
71 Jazzfish
72 Jeff1962
73 Jenn80
74 Jessicacat2
75 Johnny555
76 Jojoreese
77 Josseh
78 jra55
79 JustSarah
80 Kakanola
81 Kat60
82 kcbf
83 Kelle96
84 Kensho
85 Kisho
86 Kiya
87 Kris47
88 Ky2Beijing
89 Lifeplant
90 Lifes4living
91 Liss74
92 Littlelma
93 letustrythis123
94 Lulu212
95 Maestro
96 MamaGoat
97 Marcellina
98 MariahGayle
99 Marius76
100 Martina12
101 Marymacsmith
102 Medion
103 MetalMatt
104 Milly4me
105 Mrnigelt
106 Muhv
107 Mulligan72
108 Mvngon
109 Needtostopthis
110 NewMe30
111 New Star
112 Noexcuse
113 Ntzomb
114 Odelle
115 OliveDog
116 Paralysedforce
117 Pataphor
118 PaulinaPolitely
119 Peacehappyness
120 Peeka
121 Pinktinkfairy
122 PinkShooter
123 Pmaub
124 Purplelily
125 Resilient
126 RiverFriendAgn
127 Robert777
128 Ronjohn
129 Rose1234
130 RunnerBean
131 Ryanvandrake
132 Sammy1974
133 Sazzle
134 Scampered
135 Scaredofchange
136 Scott76
137 Serious
138 Shellflower
139 SHG13
140 SilentCinemaFan
141 Sinderos
142 Snaggle
143 soberbob11
144 SoberChristmas
145 Soberella66
146 SoberMarathon
147 SoberMM
148 SombodyElse
149 Sonrisa12
150 Startingnew2
151 Swaps
152 Tang
153 Tempe
154 Timetotry1
155 Toxicsoul
156 TrickyDave
157 TheAceFace
158 Thefist
159 TTBABP
160 Unproudone
161 Webdev
162 Will1981
163 Withope
164 Yestoffreedom
165 Ynmamflm
166 Zeepa
Before the thread moves, one last posting of the Class of January 2014 roster follows, I hope to see you all as we push forward through the year.
1 1Trail
2 2bstrong
3 Adee
4 ApisPadre
5 Argent
6 Arjip
7 Arteh
8 ArticSA
9 Autan
10 Avra
11 BigShoe
12 Binge1989
13 Blondsober
14 Bookmaven
15 Branches
16 Briar
17 Butterfly33
18 Cairns87
19 Cara39
20 Carebearlost
21 Carlygirl
22 Cheeky1
23 Chefhunter
24 ClearMind
25 ClydeChief
26 ColoradoMan
27 Countingdays
28 CoveredInRain
29 Dancerinthedark
30 Dan Dare
31 Danthehunter
32 Dax501
33 Dbskid
34 Desertsweetpea
35 Dirk626
36 Django
37 Dj72075
38 Dorris
39 Dryingup
40 EagerforChange
41 Ed2715
42 Eldy
43 Emkay
44 Ethos23
45 Far2go
46 Finnie
47 Fishy
48 Fleuryp
49 Forabetterlife
50 ForestRunner
51 FourSeasons
52 Free2Bsober13
53 FreddyBear
54 Frugal14
55 Gatorgirl67
56 Gimliman
57 Gman13
58 Goldcoastgirl
59 Grahammt21312
60 GreenEggsAndHam
61 Grindilow
62 Grocerease
63 GypsyHeart
64 Haennie
65 Halfvictory
66 Hearts
67 HopeSho
68 Imabuleva
69 Ineedhelp123
70 IreLander
71 Jazzfish
72 Jeff1962
73 Jenn80
74 Jessicacat2
75 Johnny555
76 Jojoreese
77 Josseh
78 jra55
79 JustSarah
80 Kakanola
81 Kat60
82 kcbf
83 Kelle96
84 Kensho
85 Kisho
86 Kiya
87 Kris47
88 Ky2Beijing
89 Lifeplant
90 Lifes4living
91 Liss74
92 Littlelma
93 letustrythis123
94 Lulu212
95 Maestro
96 MamaGoat
97 Marcellina
98 MariahGayle
99 Marius76
100 Martina12
101 Marymacsmith
102 Medion
103 MetalMatt
104 Milly4me
105 Mrnigelt
106 Muhv
107 Mulligan72
108 Mvngon
109 Needtostopthis
110 NewMe30
111 New Star
112 Noexcuse
113 Ntzomb
114 Odelle
115 OliveDog
116 Paralysedforce
117 Pataphor
118 PaulinaPolitely
119 Peacehappyness
120 Peeka
121 Pinktinkfairy
122 PinkShooter
123 Pmaub
124 Purplelily
125 Resilient
126 RiverFriendAgn
127 Robert777
128 Ronjohn
129 Rose1234
130 RunnerBean
131 Ryanvandrake
132 Sammy1974
133 Sazzle
134 Scampered
135 Scaredofchange
136 Scott76
137 Serious
138 Shellflower
139 SHG13
140 SilentCinemaFan
141 Sinderos
142 Snaggle
143 soberbob11
144 SoberChristmas
145 Soberella66
146 SoberMarathon
147 SoberMM
148 SombodyElse
149 Sonrisa12
150 Startingnew2
151 Swaps
152 Tang
153 Tempe
154 Timetotry1
155 Toxicsoul
156 TrickyDave
157 TheAceFace
158 Thefist
159 TTBABP
160 Unproudone
161 Webdev
162 Will1981
163 Withope
164 Yestoffreedom
165 Ynmamflm
166 Zeepa
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: US
Posts: 556
Good morning. Day 33. At some point I'll stop counting days, but for now, I find it centering.
I'm also worried about what is coming ahead. Right after 30, I hit a slump. Harder days are ahead. But really wonderful days are also ahead. Have to have one to have the other. I'm planning to stick close to SR and continue to post every day in this group - this has been such a life saver. I also love the simplicity and positivity of the 24 hour thread. Anyone who hasn't checked it out - do! It's a nice place to reiterate your intention not to drink today.
Have a good day everyone.
I'm also worried about what is coming ahead. Right after 30, I hit a slump. Harder days are ahead. But really wonderful days are also ahead. Have to have one to have the other. I'm planning to stick close to SR and continue to post every day in this group - this has been such a life saver. I also love the simplicity and positivity of the 24 hour thread. Anyone who hasn't checked it out - do! It's a nice place to reiterate your intention not to drink today.
Have a good day everyone.
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