Class of March 2013 - Part 19
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 6,224
Good morning Marchers. I just read Joy's Mom post, Joy I'm sending you my love and cyber hugs.
How is everyone going? Like Molly I'm very excited about the arrival of Ken's Jezebel. Hmm, that doesn't read right -- Ken's Jezebel -- but I'll leave it for you to read.
I was wondering about Dee yesterday, let's hope that the break is doing him good.
Have a good and sober day Marchers.
How is everyone going? Like Molly I'm very excited about the arrival of Ken's Jezebel. Hmm, that doesn't read right -- Ken's Jezebel -- but I'll leave it for you to read.
I was wondering about Dee yesterday, let's hope that the break is doing him good.
Have a good and sober day Marchers.
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Probably my living room. Maybe my bedroom if I'm feeling lazy
Posts: 1,085
Congrats Joy on your 7 months.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your mom.
So tomorrow is the big day. Taking the Amtrak up to NYC so see the surgeon. I'm writing up my list of questions now. I feel like the prognosis can't get any worse than it already is. I just need a plan; a timeline; something to follow.
The rough part is that, life still goes own. I've been so busy on one project and I had to set another project aside. Now they're beating down my neck for the other thing. It's for the same client! I can't do both things at once. So they need it by tomorrow afternoon. I'm about a 1/3 done. All the research is done. I've written the intro and just have to draft two legal sections. I really should be working on it now but I'm just so worn down. The plan is to work on the train and in the hospital while we're waiting. I'll have 5 solid hours in NYC and I doubt my appointments and tests will last that long.
Hope I get some sleep tonight. My nerves are shot.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your mom.
So tomorrow is the big day. Taking the Amtrak up to NYC so see the surgeon. I'm writing up my list of questions now. I feel like the prognosis can't get any worse than it already is. I just need a plan; a timeline; something to follow.
The rough part is that, life still goes own. I've been so busy on one project and I had to set another project aside. Now they're beating down my neck for the other thing. It's for the same client! I can't do both things at once. So they need it by tomorrow afternoon. I'm about a 1/3 done. All the research is done. I've written the intro and just have to draft two legal sections. I really should be working on it now but I'm just so worn down. The plan is to work on the train and in the hospital while we're waiting. I'll have 5 solid hours in NYC and I doubt my appointments and tests will last that long.
Hope I get some sleep tonight. My nerves are shot.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: ohio
Posts: 3,615
wow, i'm down at the "city home" and my partner (a normie) just drunk dialed me. poor thing. she is so beaten down about all this stuff with her dad. I talked to her this afternoon, and she was pretty good all things considered. we were getting some clarity on what is going on, and why the decision to not treat, etc. but then she got home, got mad that she wasn't "feeling anything" yet (not enough grief yet? not sure), and drank a bunch of margaritas.
one difference between her and I is she actually tells on herself when she drinks (hardly ever). me, i'd try to hide it for months.
my partner already has a lot of emotions/anxiety/down/dark moods. I told her I love her, and i'm certainly not judging or angry that she was drunk, but grief is an emotional roller coaster. and drinking right now is like lighting a roller coaster on fire. It has that illusion of being a readily available, fast acting stabilizer, but it's really gonna f... with you in the end. i was like, "remember all those times i tried to use alcohol to help my emotions? remember how "well" that worked out?" she kept apologizing (telltale sign of the booze factor right there), so i kept telling her there was nothing to apologize for. we just need to work through this.
wow, i keep having niggling thoughts about how "maybe it wasn't that bad." and "a few drinks won't hurt." then there's the ever popular, "but it would be so nice to take the edge off!" seeing someone i love in that shi##y mind space, knowing i can't fix it other to reassure her that she will feel better in the morning and remind her to drink some lemon-ginger tea before bed - that is one hizell of a reminder of why we are all here ladies and gentlemen.
sorry for that outrageously bad run-on. i'm in don't edit mode again.
thank you so much for being on this journey and letting me be on it with you.
one difference between her and I is she actually tells on herself when she drinks (hardly ever). me, i'd try to hide it for months.
my partner already has a lot of emotions/anxiety/down/dark moods. I told her I love her, and i'm certainly not judging or angry that she was drunk, but grief is an emotional roller coaster. and drinking right now is like lighting a roller coaster on fire. It has that illusion of being a readily available, fast acting stabilizer, but it's really gonna f... with you in the end. i was like, "remember all those times i tried to use alcohol to help my emotions? remember how "well" that worked out?" she kept apologizing (telltale sign of the booze factor right there), so i kept telling her there was nothing to apologize for. we just need to work through this.
wow, i keep having niggling thoughts about how "maybe it wasn't that bad." and "a few drinks won't hurt." then there's the ever popular, "but it would be so nice to take the edge off!" seeing someone i love in that shi##y mind space, knowing i can't fix it other to reassure her that she will feel better in the morning and remind her to drink some lemon-ginger tea before bed - that is one hizell of a reminder of why we are all here ladies and gentlemen.
sorry for that outrageously bad run-on. i'm in don't edit mode again.
thank you so much for being on this journey and letting me be on it with you.
Guest
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 891
Oh Joy, i've pm'd you. Thoughts and prayers........I really hope you, and her are okay.
WeHave, it must be so tough, I can only imagine. Huge congrats though on not giving in to that AV. As Toots recently reminded me, it's not supportive to a friend/partner/colleague/whoever to give in to that AV, at a time when they need it most and you're drowning in your own despair about what you can do to support, how do you do it? Giving in to the AV is the selfish option. It's then no longer about them and all about you. Don't do it.
Bab's, I have stumbled more times than i'm sure any Marcher can count. You've had one slip, you've proven (not that you had anything to prove other than to yourself), but you've proven you have that fight, that determination. Great to hear you're still here and back on that horse.
Hi to all. I'm still around, i've been lurking. Joined the Oct group, seem like a nice bunch, if I join anymore groups though think my new Avatar will have to change from a Coo to a Calendar girl! No more I say, no more!
WeHave, it must be so tough, I can only imagine. Huge congrats though on not giving in to that AV. As Toots recently reminded me, it's not supportive to a friend/partner/colleague/whoever to give in to that AV, at a time when they need it most and you're drowning in your own despair about what you can do to support, how do you do it? Giving in to the AV is the selfish option. It's then no longer about them and all about you. Don't do it.
Bab's, I have stumbled more times than i'm sure any Marcher can count. You've had one slip, you've proven (not that you had anything to prove other than to yourself), but you've proven you have that fight, that determination. Great to hear you're still here and back on that horse.
Hi to all. I'm still around, i've been lurking
. Joined the Oct group, seem like a nice bunch, if I join anymore groups though think my new Avatar will have to change from a Coo to a Calendar girl! No more I say, no more!
Marcher
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Florida
Posts: 3,235
Hey, just back from hospital. Mom is stable for now. It's her COPD/emphysema, heart problem (?). We'll know more tomorrow when doctor arrives for rounds and test results are read. So, she and I had a party going on in her room, laughing about some quite tasteless and inappropriate things. We are horrible, I tell you. But it lifted our spirits. Comedy therapy. She has a deviant sense of humor. I left her in good hands, with the nurses given instructions and positive reinforcements (bribery). A little name dropping is not such a bad thing always? I'm staying positive.
Yes, I remember, do you?, that mother has a bottle of Xanax and whatnot here. Not even going into that bathroom. No desire whatever. I have some ice cream. Should things change, I'll be here.
Thanks for all your good thoughts and prayers. I'll try to catch up on your posts tomorrow.
Meantime, wow, this house is quiet. Sorta creepy actually. Big old houses makes strange noises...
Yes, I remember, do you?, that mother has a bottle of Xanax and whatnot here. Not even going into that bathroom. No desire whatever. I have some ice cream. Should things change, I'll be here.
Thanks for all your good thoughts and prayers. I'll try to catch up on your posts tomorrow.
Meantime, wow, this house is quiet. Sorta creepy actually. Big old houses makes strange noises...
Living and Loving Life at Last
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: gods own country
Posts: 12,168
Joy thanks for the update, I hope you both get a good nights sleep.
LP good to see you sweetie, I'm glad you are getting something out of the October group.
Wehav, I get freakishly worried when hubby gets drunk, which is decidedly rare, but having married a drinker who became an alcoholic, and then going on to become an alkie myself, I see stupid signs everywhere! We were visiting with my daughter a couple of weekends ago, now my lass can take or leave drink, but it has been an eventful year for her, and she is in a really stressful job now, but I was almost shocked to see her sipping from a glass of rose whilst we were there, bells clanging all over the place in my head. I'm sure it was simply that she had a bottle open, it was Saturday eve and she was just chilling, but my heart was flippity flipping! It's not even that I see drunks in every drink, just the potential, which is really stoopid, as I know not every one who drinks or gets drunk becomes an alkie, but I want to warn everyone I see drinking! ' don't get like I was!'
I'm sure J will be a bit sore headed and ashamed today, I would imagine the reason she is not 'feeling' anything yet with regard to her dad, is that the distance makes it all somewhat unreal. I'm sure LP and Shoes will agree, even after attending the funeral of a loved one, it takes a while for us to stop expecting to see them.
She is lucky to have you supporting her through all this.
DD, I take it you already delegate anything you can regarding work, at least the commute and wait will give you free time, and work will keep you occupied. Good luck with the surgeon, writing everything down before hand is really good to make sure you don't forget to ask or say something.
Like Marcher, I am sending cyber hugs to you all, coping in your own ways with difficult times.
LP good to see you sweetie, I'm glad you are getting something out of the October group.
Wehav, I get freakishly worried when hubby gets drunk, which is decidedly rare, but having married a drinker who became an alcoholic, and then going on to become an alkie myself, I see stupid signs everywhere! We were visiting with my daughter a couple of weekends ago, now my lass can take or leave drink, but it has been an eventful year for her, and she is in a really stressful job now, but I was almost shocked to see her sipping from a glass of rose whilst we were there, bells clanging all over the place in my head. I'm sure it was simply that she had a bottle open, it was Saturday eve and she was just chilling, but my heart was flippity flipping! It's not even that I see drunks in every drink, just the potential, which is really stoopid, as I know not every one who drinks or gets drunk becomes an alkie, but I want to warn everyone I see drinking! ' don't get like I was!'
I'm sure J will be a bit sore headed and ashamed today, I would imagine the reason she is not 'feeling' anything yet with regard to her dad, is that the distance makes it all somewhat unreal. I'm sure LP and Shoes will agree, even after attending the funeral of a loved one, it takes a while for us to stop expecting to see them.
She is lucky to have you supporting her through all this.
DD, I take it you already delegate anything you can regarding work, at least the commute and wait will give you free time, and work will keep you occupied. Good luck with the surgeon, writing everything down before hand is really good to make sure you don't forget to ask or say something.
Like Marcher, I am sending cyber hugs to you all, coping in your own ways with difficult times.
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