stairs

Very happy for you. Relax and enjoy it. I have a daughter who was released into a rehab program from jail on her 21st birthday.

She seems to be doing well.

Keep hoping!!

Nina Kay

I have personally experienced, with my son, what you are going through, how you feel about it & I love my son more than life itself. So yes, I do know that you love your son too. You are showing signs of strength & personal recovery. Hang in there. I know it's hard for us Moms, but do take this time to rest up & relax.
******************{Understanding & Supportive Hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}

crazybabie

tjp, we know how much you love your son and YOU know your doing the right thing this post is really good for newbies IMO and your recovery is shining.

My oldest AS has spent his life in and out of institutions be it mental, jail or now his first prison stint.

My middle AS he had 1 time in jail and knows he doesn't wanna go back at least for today he has not stopped his drug use he has cut way down but not stopped.


Your taking care of you and that is what you should be doing your showing your son love your not trying to save him that is love.

LoveMeNow

TJP - We all know you LOVE your son with all your heart. We understand that you want him to feel the consequences of his choices in hopes he reaches his bottom. We support you 100%! I hope you have another great day because YOU deserve to!

Justfor1

The dorm like settings are usually for minimum security inmates.
Maximum security inmates are usually housed in cells for 20+ hrs per day. Since he uses drugs because he is bored, perhaps, he will find a new hobby in jail? Chess and various card games are usually popular. Of course, he shouldn't gamble when playing. Addicts in jail/prison usually have enough street sense to do okay in jail. He had to in order to survive the dangerous, illegal, drug lifestyle on the street.

Ilovemysonjj

Hi TJP, my son was in a dormlike setting as well. They play cards, they work out and they find ways to survive. My son was also in the minority of white guys, but they do respect each others space.

And of course, I know you adore your son and it is quite allright for you to enjoy a night out. You know he is safe and you know where he is.
Blessings and hugs,
Teresa

LoveMeNow

My friend's son was in a dorm like jail too. I hope your son likes to play cards!

I am glad you went out and enjoyed yourself. You deserve to be happy regardless of the choices he makes!!

stairs

My daughter is the champion pinochle player now. She was in a dorm, actually it was the gym since they are short on space. They watch TV, and as has been said, play cards, work out, read. Apparently the food is not very good but she survived it. I would go visit and we would touch fingers through the glass and talk on the handsets. It broke my heart and still does in a way but, I had to let it go. She is a beautiful 21 year old caucasion woman who used to be in soccer, cheerleading, basketball.....but that was then and this is now. I had a really hard time with that. Like you, I love her with all my heart. But after so much misery and pain I had to detach from her.

Big hugs to you!

oooopps

tjp, my mom and dad would do the exact same thing in your position. it's the best thing you can do for your son, letting him face the consequences of his act.

LoveMeNow

Do you really think your son is scared, or was that just manipulation? I hear there is a lot of pillow stealing going on in those dorm like cells.

tjp613

Yes, I believe he's scared!! He's a very gentle soul... would never hurt anyone intentionally...has always been very sensitive in all regards, hates conflict of all kind, is very polite and respectful, etc. In other words he doesn't have a 'bad-ass' bone in his body. He is a peacemaker. So yeah, he's pretty much out of his element. But I'm sure he's also exaggerating a bit so that I'll freak out and scramble to post his bail. I talked to him earlier and he said he's already got a nick-name....it's "Sunshine"...LOL That should tell you something.

He sounded better today...not as scared but definitely nervous and says he can't seem to calm his mind. Says the stress is very difficult to manage and he's trying to meditate and use other relaxation techniques.

This might just be a turning point for him. Just maybe.

kmangel

Rest assured that this time in jail may just be the incentive needed to speed up his resolve to quit drugs. Let him out early may do just the opposite. You are doing the right thing. You are not a heartless b----h. Be strong and trust that your son is just where he needs to be and a better future is likely around the corner for him--after his time spent in jail.

lesliej

I remember one of the times that my ex found his way to jail, in the middle of a crack binge...what a relief it was for me and others in his community to know he was safe...all of us totally loved him and knew he was somewhere safe, and yes...we could rest for awhile.

back then when he would disappear for a few days he wasn't the only one not sleeping
god how I do NOT miss those disappearances

I am glad for you that you have this time to take a break...and have some hope that maybe this will scare him enough to be his bottom
peace!

Ilovemysonjj

Hi TJP, he also may be detoxing (not sure when he actually got put in jail), which makes them a bit remorseful. I remember my son calling on day 3, bawling on the phone and acknowledging his helplessness over drugs. I did put money on his commissary for food and phone time. we gave him $60.00 every two weeks.
He made it in 4 months, but I do have to say he got his first tattoo in jail , at least it was very small.