cessy68

Callie,

i know you have resources as far a 'some' money.

I had an abusive ex. I had a 9month old child with him, and 2 older kids. One day his anger spiraled out-of control. (he was NOT an addict) rather, he was/is a cop.

Anyhow, even without the influence of drugs, he swung around and hit my back, (in anger, not intentional). HOWEVER, that was it.

He left to go somewhere to 'cool down' for a few hours. I called my sister, and cousin. They came with 2 pickup trucks, and I grabbed a paper. I found the first cheapest 3 bedroom apartment i could find in the dead of winter... during a dang snowstorm.

Within hours I found myself signing a lease........ and moving w/ the aid of my family every last stitch of our stuff out of my home. Yes, I LEFT BEHIND THE HOME I CLEANED, and PAID FOR>>> etc. (I still laugh 12 yrs later at the open box of pasta... that I HAD TO GRAB... as it spilt all over the floor).

Anyhow, he came home to an empty home, without me or my kids. He obviously knew it was the end.

He knew he made his mistakes...but it no longer mattered.

It's funny, that little apartment was the start of a brand new life for me. I am telling you, it is YOUR responsiblity to realize that HE IS OUT OF CONTROL, and even if it is BY ACCIDENT, he could harm you and your kids.

Pick up the stuff and go. Not only will you be doing what is right for your kids, but you will soon see, that the dang house only was something holding you DOWN.

Bless you and your family tonight.
Love,
cess

tjp613

Hi Callie - I just wish I was there with you to give you a huge hug and help you thru this. To me it sounds like you are doing your best although some may sound frustrated, it really is just because we care about you and want you to be safe.

I think they're on the right track by advising you to pack up your important/valuable stuff and move out. I'd suggest a shelter because that way the kids won't have to go to school where they are left vulnerable -- you can all get counseling while you're there, too. You will have some much needed peace. Second choice would be an apartment -- but that sounds like too much moving and too much added stress. Third option is your parents, but he can easily find you there which puts you ALL in danger.

I know it sounds/feels like a crazy thing, but please consider going into a shelter for a few days or a week.

I'm sure the cops are all over him, just waiting for him to screw up -- so maybe it won't be long now.

I'm praying for you -- we all are. You are NOT alone.

(((((HUGS)))))

serenityqueen

Don't walk into that house again, until he is locked up in jail. There can't be anything that is there that is worth risking your life for. As others have said, thinking you're ok when he isn't there is crazy because he shows up. One day, he may show up with a gun. Callie, I don't want to read where your Mom or Dad come on here and share with us that he killed you, then himself. Or since we live in the same state, I could very well see it on the news. I don't want to see that, I don't want to come on here and tell everyone that you're gone.

PLEASE! I have never prayed for someone to get arrested and kick dope in jail, but I am praying for that now. I hope he doesn't show up tomorrow for Court and a warrant is issued. They'll know where to find him, that's for sure.

I'm wondering if the reason they aren't doing something, especially after all the cars he's out wrecking, is because they are gathering information on someone he is dealing with. . . getting indictments ready. Even if that is the case, you need to stay as far away from him as possible.

I know I keep repeating myself here and others are too, but we care about you & some of us (myself included) have seen first hand the deadly results this can end up having.

Prayers,
Judy

Callie

Just to answer a few questions.

I HAVE to keep the auto insurance on him because if I don't and he wrecks the car or kills someone or hurts himself I will be liable. We are still married and until the divorce is final they will come after him for the liability, when they get nothing from him, they will go on to me. Ultimately I will be liable. I'm not going to risk loosing 7 figures in assets because I didn't pay his $500 premium. I have talked with 3 lawyers regarding this so I cannot just drop insurance unless I want to risk being sued.

Coffee drinker - we live in a small town, AH knows the owner of the car lot. He said AH was fine when he came in, he gave him the keys (not uncommon here) and an hour later AH wrecked and was out of his mind.

I would say a bench warrant will probably be issued today because I doubt he'll show up for court. Serenity, I'm praying for something like that too. He's OUT of control. A freight train running full speed ahead taking down everything in his path.

This is a man who loves his kids, yet drained their piggy banks this week. This is a man whom 2 months ago was driving semi's for my dad and has wrecked 3 vehicles in 10 days. This is a man who was ALWAYS respectful to my family, but has tried to con my uncle/aunt and parents in the last 10 days. This is a man who has diligently applied scar cream for the last year because he was ashamed of his track marks, but now has them butchered up again. This is a man who for 22 years was a productive member of society out of high school and always had a job, but is now potentially facing a long time in jail. This is a man whom my family loves dearly, he's broken their hearts.

I guess that's all that I have to say.

cece1960

Callie, you've been given good advise and a lot to ponder.
I think this would be a good time to close this thread, as it has indeed run its course.