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I did not post previous-party time for the druggies

Old 07-21-2007, 01:44 PM
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I did not post previous-party time for the druggies

I am soooooo embrassed over what one would think was my post. I did not post it. Hubby did have access/list to each and everything I did on the computer. "They(his friends from childhood all druggies) had a field day, yesterday. Maxed out my gas card, wiped out my PayPal acct.(he took the camera), got into my checking acct. and now $60 overdrawn-had to call my bank friend at home this am. Changed ever password-and hopefully it is done. This mess really did put me into a tailspin. I did tell him about this site and he hated it-finally faced up to him being a total addict and told him NO! Thanks again for your support!!!!!! LOL
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Old 07-21-2007, 01:50 PM
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I responded to your post... didn't understand the spanish? LOL... so it didn't embarrass me. LOL ... seriously if your hubby is this bad in his addiction, do all you can to protect yourself financially. Don't believe your mind when it tells you he would never do "such and such"... when in active addiction the addict will lie and steal to feed the addiction, no matter if it hurts the ones who love them most.
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Old 07-21-2007, 01:50 PM
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If he posts anything on here, let one of the mods know, and they can remove it! Did you change your password? Also, you could always change your name and start over! I bumped the other thread so that everyone could see what you were talking about! Hope that helps!
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Old 07-21-2007, 01:58 PM
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That explains that, I was going to ask you to repost in German, so I could figure out the post!

Don't worry about it, just do something to protect yourself finacially, change your pin numbers, open a new checking account in your name only, and change your Pay Pal password, like now.

Take care of you!
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Old 07-21-2007, 02:09 PM
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YOU MUST GET TO THE BANK, EITHER BY MAIL OR PHONE OR IN PERSON and CANCEL YOUR ACCOOUNTS, CHANGE NUMBERS AND PROTECT WITH PASS WORDS. NOW.

CANCEL GAS CARDS. CANCEL CREDIT CARDS. GET HIM OFF OF YOU FINANCIALLY.

TODAY. NOW. THIS MINUTE!!!!
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Old 07-21-2007, 02:55 PM
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Momsrainbow, Read this. It will help you to protect yourself!

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ht=tips+addict
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Old 07-21-2007, 02:59 PM
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sorry this has happened, i agree with the others. protect yourself, and i'll be praying for you and yours
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Old 07-21-2007, 08:42 PM
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No need to apologize, we've all been through situations like this, and it is pretty obvious that it wasn't you that posted.

I will remove it now, sorry I missed it earlier.

If you need to change your name, contact a mod and arrangements can be made.

Hugs
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Old 07-22-2007, 04:37 AM
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Thank you all. I did report the gas card as stolen. All accounts are in my name-he had the bank debit card and apparently used it a the machine at the bank-I called a lady bank officer at home-debit card is no longer active. Told her to beware-I am no longer making any bank payments for him. He had talked me into putting the truck in his name last yr. so he could buy a camper. Dummy me. Last week he went to the bank and bought a $6,000 4 wheeler(in his name) and brought it to show me. I imagine he will make a payment or two and then???? Nothing else is in his name nor can he touch it-even if I was to die. Since we married 2 yrs. ago I never used his last name-kept mine.Neighbors changed the house locks over a month ago. All too new and shocking for me-but I keep reading all the posts and they certainly open my eyes and I know I am not alone. I do feel alone, however, but getting stronger every day.
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Old 07-22-2007, 05:02 AM
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If he used the gas card or the bank card you can report either or both as stolen.

If he used them, or attempts to, he can be prosecuted. He can go to jail.

If he bought something in his name and stops paying for it, they may be able to come after you for the debt depending on State Law and how that State views property ownership after people are married. You need to talk to an attorney and get this stuff figured out and straightened out.

If he bought something (like the 4 wheeler) and stops paying for it, do NOT pay anything and let it be re-po'd. If his credit is ruined, that is a consequence of his actions.
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Old 07-22-2007, 05:25 AM
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He totally wrecked my PERFECT credit-trying to pay his bills. I do have an attorney-even he is digusted with the mess. We think we have everything covered but seems like these "street smart" druggies always can figure a way to "get something". He never had credit or knew how to pay a bill until he came home from prison almost 2 yrs. ago. He still does not know how to pay a bill and I simply do not care.... Even if I was to get a "soft heart" there is absolutely not a penny left to pay anything!!!! No alimony or spousal support in this state. Do have a promissary note for $30,000 signed a few yrs. back-lawyer is filing it-(no legal job) but he will end up in contempt of court and his parole officer will be aware of it. Getting better every day thanks to all of you-just feel a tad of revenge or payback. Love is gone-completely!!!
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Old 07-22-2007, 08:32 AM
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good luck with all you're doing, I know it's hard so hang in there.
I"m glad to hear you saying your getting stronger everyday, thats important.
again, good luck
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Old 07-22-2007, 08:48 AM
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Originally Posted by Momsrainbow View Post
Getting better every day thanks to all of you-just feel a tad of revenge or payback. Love is gone-completely!!!

I've done the revenge thing..........in my head. I know how you feel, but it's best to just fantasize about it lol. I've been told by some pretty wonderful people here that the best revenge is to live a good life. There is so much truth to that.

I'm sorry you had to go through all of this. My credit was ruined too. Never say "dummy me" because get this...........I wasn't even married to the shmuck!!

I'm glad you're feeling stronger everyday. You just hang with us sweetpea. You'll be ok I guarantee it.
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Old 07-22-2007, 11:39 AM
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I know what you mean about the fantasizing revenge-I have done that for several yrs. with him. Truly never tried to hurt him-just get help for his addiction. Now I find out he is doing the scrap metal thing-making 400-1200 a day and off city/government property. That should be enough to keep him and his group in "weed, etc". quite comfortably. He was never a thief like this-only with me. I did call the local police friend and he gave me 2 numbers to call Monday. Is this revenge? I feel it is cutting off the $$$$ supply to a ton of druggies. Shmuck is a good word-a lot better than what I have been saying. I will survive this-one way or the other and be a better person!!!!! Thanks to all. LOL
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Old 07-22-2007, 01:38 PM
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Do yourself a favor... keep a record of all this, the posts he put up included. You never know how the marriage is going to go... and this may sound harsh, but tangible evidence is a good thing to have, even between loved ones. You never know when it may come in handy.

Seriously, they broke so many laws last night, it boggles the mind. That's a lot of power he just gave you over him and his friends. You may want to think long and hard what you do with it.
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Old 07-22-2007, 02:05 PM
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Moms...

You have every right in the world to be angry. Try and use the anger to get you where you want to go. I went a long, long, long way on mine. Its kind of like gasoline for the car at the beginning of your seperation from them.

Hang in there. Things can and will get better. You're on your way to a better life whether you realize it or not (but I think you most definitely do...)

Hugs...
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Old 07-22-2007, 05:28 PM
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Such a lot of encouragement from all of you. Got up and off the month long pity potty and feeling sorry for myself. Went outside and looked around the beautiful yard I used to have-he had barely touched it this year. Flowerbeds grown up in weeds and trees. I cried. Then decided to take the anger I feel out of the weeds and lawn. Must have been a lot of anger-neighbor came over and told me how great it was looking. I had to do the front yard with an electric weedeater. Hubby Tweeked" two perfectly good mowers this year-just to get out of cutting the lawn. Yep, think I am going to make it. Will probably have a lot of down days but hopefully most will be up ones. Checked his cell phone calls-he has not used it since early Fri.-Good-what I don't know will not hurt me. Fog is lifting!!!!!! Hope to stay with this site forever!!!!!! LOL
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Old 07-22-2007, 07:01 PM
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you are doing good. what i do if i get upset is,i scrub the kitchen floor, something that takes energy. lol...you will be fine.i am sorry he is still doing all there things.hugs,
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Old 07-22-2007, 07:58 PM
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Originally Posted by hope213 View Post
you are doing good. what i do if i get upset is,i scrub the kitchen floor, something that takes energy. lol...,

Oh yea!!! I got so much accomplished around my place too honey! Looootts of nervous energy going on at that time. I re-painted my house.......twice, re-tiled the living room, Planted a few flower beds and did the whole weed thing like you did today, detailed my car.........oh my....I could go on and on, but I won't lol.

See, we're all alike for the most part. We've all been through this and we're here to help you get through it.
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Old 07-22-2007, 07:59 PM
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The sticky-WHAT ADDICTS DO-kept my sanity early tonight. The end of the sticky-DON'T BE SUPRISED. Found out he is running with all his friends from when he was a teenager(all meth, weed. pill freaks and who knows what else. )the whole pack just not a couple. Also found out he was back with his "meth *****". Not suprised, not shocked, not angry-should have seen it coming and a waste of 5 yrs., tons of money, my truck and a lot of love that could have gone elsewhere. Been here less than a month and finally "got it". He did it ,not me-not my fault. Tried to help when I suspected and he turned away. Such is the life of an addict-especially a hopeless one. THANK YOU ALL!!!! LOL
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